Masochistic Humiliation

[Continued from Summertime: Dogs, Wieners, and Buns]

 

Knotty

“You left her there, like that, on the couch, mounted by her pup?”

“Yes,” said Lo, followed by, “Now have me, Daddy.”

“But wait,” I replied.  She walked away down the hallway to the bedroom.  By the time I got there, she was naked on the bed, lying on her tum, her bare feet dangling in the air above her, her legs spread wide.

“Daddy, come, play with my pussy,” she said.

I pulled off my clothes hastily and got on top of her.  To my surprise, she was engrossed in some photos on her phone.

“What are you looking at?” I inquired as I slowly inserted my cock between her dripping wet pussy lips and slid it in right down to the shaft.

She moaned and said, “Is that your idea of foreplay?  I said play with my pussy, not impale it.”

I pulled out.

“I didn’t say stop,” she grunted.

I slid in again.

“I thought your idea of foreplay,” said I, “was mounting my hard cock as I slept.”

“That’s only one idea.  There are a lot of others.”

“What are you looking at?” I asked again, more demanding now since her hands were deliberately covering the screen of her phone.

“Nothing,” she said.

She was lying.  I knew that.  I thought, “OK, let her have her little secrets.  I’ll find out later.”

“Why did you leave Scarlett?” I asked, trying to pump her for information.

“No talk.  Fuck,” she instructed.

I gave up on my curiosity and simply explored her deepest recesses with my prick rather than with my pointed words.

“My ass!” she said, reaching both hands behind her and grabbing her ass cheeks to spread them and give me a clear target.  “I want you to fuck my ass and then my puss and then my ass again – like a dog whose heat-seeking sensor keeps getting confused.”

It was an odd juxtaposition of simile and metaphor, but I was not going to nitpick at that moment.  It was clear that her experience with Scarlett had left a lasting impression.

I gave her what she had requested, back-then-front and back again.  In-out-in-out.  Cunt-rump, cunt-rump, repeat.  She was gushing.

The entire time she was looking down at her screen.

“Now,” she commanded, “ram it home up my ass.  NOW!”

No time to think.  Deep spelunking down her dark cavern.

“FUUUUUUCK!” was the response.  This was the key to unlock the water works as her pussy gushed forth all at once in a deluge resembling the explosion of a water balloon.

Everything was drenched – me, the bed, her legs.

She finally rolled over on her back and, her breasts heaving with her deep breaths, she managed to smile a grin of relief and whisper between inhaling, “Thank you, Daddy.”

I crawled up next to her and, after she regained her equilibrium, she squirmed on the soaking wet bed and took my cock in her mouth.  I was still hard.  I had not cum.  The pressure of performing outweighed the pleasure of putting it in her ass.

She began to lick and to insert my cock deep to the back of her throat as the fingers of her right hand tickled and cupped my testicles.

I took advantage of her preoccupation with insuring that I gain as much pleasure as she to grab her phone and discover what had her so enchanted while I fucked her.

The photos surprised me.  She had found a cache of Irena Ionesco’s photographs of her daughter Eva.  Apparently, the mother-daughter dynamic had appealed to her prurient imagination.

Eva

Eva

Eva

Eva and friend

Eva

Eva

Lola imitating Eva Ionesco’s photo

I wasn’t ready for my exquisite torture to be over just yet.

Reaching down and grabbing Lo’s thick mane – a move she usually loves because I’m usually holding her on my cock in the position that affords the most pleasure to me – I gently pulled her off of the bone she was so eager to fondle with her face.

“Lo, come here,” I whispered.

She looked up at me, disappointed.  She is not satisfied until and unless her fornication friend is satisfied.

“Is everything ok?” she asked.

“Yes,” I said.  “I just want to talk with you.  I want to hear your story.”

“I told you already.”

“No, I want to know more.”

She slid up from my crotch to lie on the pillow facing me as I was lying on my pillow.

“Like what?” she asked.

“Why did you leave Scarlett?”

“She was completely incapacitated.  Reilly had mounted her and was riding her good.  He had already cum – into the pillow – and he was going to take a while.”

“So?  She could have licked your pussy while the dog had his way with her from behind.  You could have been next in line, if Reilly was riled up enough.  You’ve been aching for that again.  Anything could have happened.”

“Is that what you want?  Did I let you down, Daddy?”

“It’s not about me,” I said, a bit sorry that she was taking my comments that way.  “I’m just surprised.  You clearly like this woman.  You’re attracted to her.  And – to have a four-legged friend trained in the art of pleasing its mistress. . .”

I didn’t have to continue because we both knew what sorts of erotic fantasies she dreams up while masturbating; dreams and fantasies of past experiences reconfigured into imaginings of future fun.

“You don’t understand, Daddy.  She looked so, well, the only word I can think of is incapacitated.  She was impaled on his prick and he was like the puppet master, pulling her strings with it.  She seemed so, so. . .” Lo struggled to find the right word, “pathetic.”

“Pathetic?”
“Yes.  I mean, there she was, Collin’s right-hand woman, as she called herself.  Older, sophisticated, sexy, all put-together, and that British accent!  You have no idea what that does to me!  She looks down at me with that haughty, superior look.”

“I’m sure that’s just in your mind,” I said, doubtful that Scarlett, whom I had yet to meet, was looking down at Lo.  Looking at her as a piece of meat to be devoured, maybe, but not looking down at her.

“Maybe, but it doesn’t matter,” said Lo, “that’s how I felt around her.  But when she was being fucked by her furry friend, when she was desperate to have me, when she was completely and utterly debased and degraded like that on the couch, her big breasts hanging down, rocking forward-and-back under the thin, transparent fabric of her blouse, and she was unable to do a thing about it – that’s when I knew I had to go.”

“But why?”

“Because it gave me the upper hand for once.  If I had stayed and let her lap up my labia, let Reilly ram his red rocket down my ravenous vagina like he was doing to her, and be made his bitch as completely and helplessly as she was, well then, I’d have even less self-respect next time I see her than I did the first time.”

“But you wanted her?”

“When she was washing my legs in the bathtub,” she said, her eyes glazed over as the scene played out before her mind’s eye, “and she hopped in, completely clothed, and got between my legs to wash my inner thighs, I was nearly certain she was going to ask me to piss all over her – her beautiful hair, her beautiful face, her red red lips, on her flimsy, sexy blouse and tits.”

“You really think she was going to ask that or. . .”
“Maybe I was hoping she’d ask for that.”

“Because, again, you’d have the upper hand.  You’d be demeaning her, humiliating her by pissing on her.”

“Yeah, probably.  What could be more humiliating?”

“You like it,” I reminded her, though she needed no reminding, I’m sure.

“Yeah, because I’m a masochist.”

“Well, maybe she is too.”

“No doubt,” she said, “but, if she goes about all haughty and holier than thou professionally – like she’s the sadist, at least towards me – then I’m not about to let her soon forget who is in charge in the bedroom.”

“A little sadistic streak in you too, then.”

“Yes.”

“Well, I guess you have met your match.”

“Daddy,” she said, “you’re my match.”

“You’re too young to remember, but a standard matchbox would come with twenty or fifty matches.”

“That’s a lot of fire.”

“Looks like she lit a flame between your legs.”

“Fuck me again, Daddy.  Like a doggy.  In my ass,” she said.  “And give me my phone back, you sneak!”

XXX-mas Party with an image of Lola and friend above the mantle.

 

Interview with Safe Word author: Molly Weatherfield, a.k.a. Pam Rosenthal

If you missed Part I of our two-part interview with Pam Rosenthal, whose erotica pen name is Molly Weatherfield, then you will want to check out THIS POST.

Her award-winning first book, Carrie’s Story, was followed by an even more wild adventure – both in terms of plot, sex, and narrative style – Safe Word.

Here is Lola’s interview with Molly and also an amazing illustration done by our dear friend in Ukraine, Sergii.  The illustration shows Lola, lying down on the floor, reading Carrie’s Story, as Pam Rosenthal (top left) looks on at her fictional author, Molly Weatherfield (top right) and Molly’s fictional character, Carrie looks to her creator with admiration.

Pam, Molly, Carrie, Lola

Questions for Pam Rosenthal, a.k.a. Molly Weatherfield – PART TWO – Safe Word

Lola – I’m so glad you enjoyed the first interview and have agreed to a second for the sequel book, Safe Word! As I said at the end of our last interview, I totally needed a sequel because I didn’t want Carrie’s Story to end – especially not where it did end. But, I have to say, Safe Word did not follow any of the possible narrative sexcapades that I had imagined at the end of Carrie’s Story – and I imagined a lot!

This will be a tricky interview because I don’t want to give away too much of the book for anyone who hasn’t read it yet, but – OMG! – you really took off for the sequel! As in, Safe Word was off to the races!

Compared to Carrie’s Story, this book has a lot of steamy man-on-man sex and BDSM. Where did that come from and, again, were you worried about pushing boundaries or even warping genres?

Safe Word by Molly Weatherfield

Molly – Actually, I was so surprised to be writing it at all, that I never thought about whether I was taking things too far. I mean, I had told everybody that Carrie’s Story was a one-off, and that I was done. And then I found out that I wasn’t, which was such a gift, and so unexpected, that I just ran with it.

As for the man-on-man sex, I don’t remember it as being a conceptual departure from the first book. It’s just that in Safe Word there are more opportunities for variation. Carrie has moved on to a bigger world, with more possibilities, while Jonathan is kind of rediscovering that world. What wasn’t entirely explicit in Carrie’s Story (though Kate is kind of grumpy about it) is that for the year or two when he’s most involved with Carrie, Jonathan has stopped being active in the association and its doings. But with Carrie gone, his old life comes rushing in on him again. What I was going for was a sense that the magnitude and the variety of this hidden world of sexual exchange and domination should be always revealing more of itself to the reader, through Carrie’s and Jonathan’s narratives of the year they’ve spent apart. I used to call this the “Snoopy’s doghouse” approach, but clearly, it was a way to conceptualize my own fantasy life as I explored it. 

Lola – There were a couple of points in the novel where I laughed out loud because the plot went in such an unexpected direction. For instance, the rivalry between Carrie and Stephanie really reminded me of some of the YA books I had read. And then, while in the stable, Carrie befriends her neighbor by clandestinely using a piece of rubber tube to communicate between stalls. That reminded me of a scene from V for Vendetta, which came out much later than your book. And you mentioned to me before the interview that the first scene of the book is right from Little Women. Two more disparate books, I think, could not be found. Was this sort of juxtaposition of texts part of your plan or did it just come out that way and you realized it after?

Molly – I don’t know anything about V for Vendetta. But the Carrie and Stephanie rivalry is very YA, you’re right. And it was inspired by something that happened years ago among a bunch of adults, including me, who were traveling and working together. And because of the pressures of the situation, we found ourselves sometimes acting like bratty teenagers, even to the midnight giggling and whispering. Not proud of it, but there you are.

As for Little Women, thankfully it was only after I’d finished writing the first scene of Safe Word that I realized that I’d copped it from the scene in Little Women when Laurie first catches up with Amy in Europe. In the Greta Gerwig movie the scene is shown from the p.o.v. of Amy in the carriage with Aunt March. But in the novel, it’s very similar to the scene in Safe Word: first a kind of birds-eye view of the setting in the south of France, then focusing in on a very handsome American man who’s being rather ogled by passers-by while he waits for a particular young woman.

Here are some snippets of the passage from Little Women:

At three o’clock in the afternoon, all the fashionable world at Nice may be seen on the Promenade des Anglais, a charming place… Along this walk, on Christmas Day, a tall young man walked slowly, with his hands behind him, and a somewhat absent expression of countenance… which caused sundry pairs of feminine eyes to look approvingly after him… There were plenty of pretty faces to admire, but the young man took little notice of them, except to glance, now and then, at some blonde girl, or lady in blue.

And here are some parallel bits from Safe Word:

The city itself [Avignon] is heavily touristed… On this particular day… however, it was sunny and lively… An American man was sitting at one of the cafes… and he’d been glancing up eagerly whenever a slender young woman, especially one with close-cropped hair, came from that direction… Lots of attractive people were strolling… lots of women he liked looking at… and since he was extraordinarily good-looking… none of this was going unnoticed.

What was so remarkable to me when I finally realized what I’d done, was remembering how much I’d loved the scene in Little Women when I read it as a breathless 9-year-old, just knocked out by what I took to be its elegance and sophistication. The point of view and the rhythm of the phrasing had clearly imprinted itself onto me and yet my conscious mind didn’t remember it at all; when I was writing that part of Safe Word I was focused on the Avignon history (which are themselves copped from Francine du Plessis Gray’s At Home with the Marquis de Sade, the book I’d reviewed for Salon.com). 

But then, in both Carrie books — and really in everything I’ve ever written — I used so much of what I’d read and experienced, even when it might not appear directly apposite to the subject at hand, which I think is awesome evidence of the heavy lifting the mind and memory are capable of during the creative process. Once, at a reading, I was introduced by the author and anthologist Violet Blue, who said to me, jokingly, “I feel that I know you.” To which I replied, about 90% seriously, “You do.”

Lola – Whereas Carrie’s Story was, like many erotica books, a romance novel with kinks and explicit scenes, Safe Word is a much more complex work. I really appreciated the multilayer narrative. On one level you have Carrie, who is in love with life in general and is open-minded and willing to experience all of it. (I love that about her!) But there is always the lingering question in the background of the book (carried over from the first novel) of whether she will get together with her most obvious love interest, Jonathan. But Jonathan is engaged in his own love affair with Kate. And then, because none of these characters are simple, one dimensional, or merely functional for the plot, there is always the possibility that Kate and Carrie will fall in love. I had no idea how it would end, even right up to the last pages! How did this complex plot develop?

Molly – For maybe three quarters of the process, I didn’t know how it would end either. And I guess that I only found my ending when I’d realized that I’d come to the outer limit of my erotic imagination; the feeling that I couldn’t make things any heavier, deeper, or more hardcore and still continue having fun in fantasyland.

Kate’s my favorite character in some ways. I have no idea where I got the idea for her, but I’m always wanting to know (i.e. imagine, i.e. write) more parts of her backstory, to account for her toughness and honesty. I was also kind of obsessed with how Jonathan’s such a pampered little prince: I enjoyed imagining him, but I found myself resenting how much he gets away with; I remember explaining to author and sexual activist Carol Queen that I thought of him like my cat — so beautiful that somehow he existed to be spoiled and indulged. I found their story provocative, sexy, and a bit troubling — as Carrie does, even if she begins to wonder whether it’s her story any longer. 

Lola – And, while we’re on the topic of narrative complexity, the trading of stories between Carrie and Jonathan as they seduce each other and then seduce each other again was brilliant! Of course they would seduce each other with words. I can appreciate breaking with conventional narrative form. This book is so inventive, not just for erotica, but as a novel. Did you feel as if you were breaking new ground that way?

Molly – I’m not really satisfied with how it flows between Carrie’s narrative, Jonathan’s narrative, and the overriding omniscient storytelling, but it was the best I could do with what technical chops I had. So I guess the best answer is that I was breaking new ground for me, and maybe for a certain kind of erotica, but that I was and am haunted by knowing that there are narrative techniques that I didn’t (and don’t) know how to employ. Yhat isn’t at all to say that I’m sorry I wrote it. I did the best I could with what I wanted to say, and in many ways it’s my favorite of my books.

Lola – One aspect of the book I really enjoyed was that the “masters” or “owners” were not only rich men. And the “slaves” or “subs” weren’t just women. (Other than Carrie, we don’t really know their socio-economic status in the civilian world.) There is a certain sexual equality in the book, if not economic equality. I also took particular delight in Jonathan’s punishment for breaking the rules. That really put a dent in the sense that these rich folk were beyond being flogged themselves. And, it’s clear throughout that Kate is the dom to just about all the other characters. Did it just flow that way as you were writing it, or did you have a political statement in mind?

Molly – Again, the sexual equality was what I’d learned from Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty books. I didn’t have a political statement in mind, although I suppose these days you could look at it that way. At the time, though, I was just glad to be exploring the world I was imagining, and grateful to those who’d given me a world of increased possibility. 

Lola – “Feminism” means something different to just about each person who uses the word. I could picture some self-proclaimed feminists (especially Second Wave Feminists) getting their panties in a bunch about your erotica. But one aspect of Third Wave Feminism that I really embrace is the sex positivity – the notion that we all have our little kinks and there’s nothing wrong with living them out loud. So much sexual repression is a function of patriarchy and a healthy sexuality can look and feel all different ways for different people, including Male Dom/Female Sub relationships. Such relationships are not necessarily symptoms or results of patriarchy, or not simply so, at least. Did you receive a lot of criticism from other women/feminists for your writing?

Molly – No criticism at all from women or feminists. I know, it’s weird, right? But true nonetheless.

Lola – I’m sorry for my ignorance, but I wasn’t even born when this book was published. So, can you indulge me a little? The pony play. Where did that come from? If I do a Google search now for “bdsm pony girl race” I will get hundreds of images of women in various states of dress (leather, buckles, naked but for the harness, etc.) with bits in their mouths pulling little rickshaws with doms ready to whip them. I lack the historical knowledge to know if all this porn was inspired by your book (was it the first of this sort?), or if there was already a sub-culture of cosplay or other BDSM play that inspired you.

Molly – Pony play was around before I wrote Carrie’s Story, but I didn’t know about it. I only found out about it after I’d finished a short first draft and was looking for ways to extend it to novel length. Visiting a San Francisco leather/fetish store for inspiration, I found a glossy magazine containing an extensive photo shoot of some real-girls’ pony farm somewhere — or maybe it was all staged, I don’t know. Anyway, I leafed through it in kind of a fearful fever dream, jammed the magazine back onto the rack, stumbled out of the store, and drove home. Only to turn around, get back in the car, drive back, buy the magazine, read it over a few times, and write the Sir Harold chapter in a crazy burst of words that I’ve never been able to equal. It wasn’t writing, exactly: it was copying, as fast as my fingers would go, what my frenzied imagination was dreaming up as fast as it could. And then I retrofitted the earlier chapters around it.

Lola – Since our last interview, you mentioned that you wanted to post a link to the interview on your Facebook page, but were concerned that the censors might punish you for it. Along the lines of historical reference, can you talk about what sorts of shifts you’ve seen politically and artistically in tolerance and censorship with regard to erotica? There seems to be a growing movement in England and America to reduce access to certain material. I know we, with our blog, have been constantly challenged by censorship. I get my social media zapped on the regular and certain companies that transfer money refuse to send us funds because the money is made through sexually explicit material. What have you seen over the years?

Stroll?

Molly – First about censorship: Honestly, it’s been such a long time since I’ve written or actively promoted myself that I don’t have any specifics, but friends who are still writing are always dealing with it, and though I know stuff is always being challenged on Amazon, I’m sorry that I really don’t have any insights to share. I posted the link on my Molly Weatherfield page, which Facebook said it was going to take down. But they haven’t yet, so I’m totally confused. But I didn’t paste a link from my Pam Rosenthal page because I use it to connect to old friends and extended family, and I don’t want them to shut that down, so I’m more circumspect about erotic posts there.

As for shifts in standards, a few wildly unrelated points: 

  • I’m guessing that these days there’s a lot of really intense stuff out there, of a sensibility to appeal to readers of a different generation than mine. I’m told that my teenage granddaughters read stuff that’s crazy explicit (not my stuff, but who could blame them?). But I’m shy to pry too deeply, so I don’t know much. 
  • I’ve always objected to any pornography that tries to locate kinky sensibility in childhood trauma; it seems to me that when you do that you delegitimize freedom of choice and imagination by pretending to be on the side of the “victims” while at the same time scapegoating some nasty “victimizers” by blaming them for your own fantasy life. To the extent that Fifty Shades was coherent, it seems to me that it played that nasty trauma card while going all swoony over private jets and diamond bracelets — but since I found the book a dreary, disorganized read and wound up skipping long passages, who knows what she was getting at? 
  • What most troubles me right now is a kind of eroticizing of totally illegitimate power, as described in this powerful, smart, and scary essay: https://slowcivilwar.substack.com/p/thats-bait. If there’s anything I’ve tried to be clear and consistent about in these interviews it’s that I always situate my fantasies within a framework of total consensuality and freedom to say no. I really hate erotic fantasy that’s in any way based on coercion, and my imagination tends to shrivel up in horror when I don’t feel safe; which I don’t, these days — less as an erotic writer than as an ordinary American who cherishes democracy and the rule of law.

Lola – Lightning round of questions: Favorite erotica author? Favorite book (of any genre)? Favorite poet? Favorite movie? Favorite porn star? Favorite play of Shakespeare’s? Favorite sex toy? Favorite age (meaning, did you love your 20’s, 30’s, 80’s the most) and why?

Molly – Pauline Réage, who wrote Story of O, has got to be at the top of the list. Erotic authors I’ve admired over the years are Michelle Tea, Aaron Travis, Thomas Roche. I’ve mentioned Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty books, but I need to add that the direct inspiration for the association comes from the opening chapter of Rice’s book Exit to Eden. Actually, I’ve been reading more erotic poetry than fiction lately. Natalie Diaz’s book, Postcolonial Love Poem, has some really hot writing in it and won the 2021 Pulitzer Prize for Poetry; and you should run-not-walk to buy The Poetry of Sex, edited by Sophie Hannah.

I don’t have a favorite porn film, but the most smoking hot movie I’ve ever seen is Ang Lee’s Lust, Caution, starring the sexiest film actor I’ve ever seen, Tony Leung. 

All-time favorite pieces of writing: Grace Paley’s short story, “Friends”; The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (imo the great American novel); and Proust’s epic In Search of Lost Time, which is kind of my basic spiritual discipline.

Favorite play of Shakespeare? When I was young it was Much Ado About Nothing, clearly the first romcom. Now it’s absolutely King Lear, particularly in this version: https://www.ntathome.com/king-lear/videos/king-lear-trailer

No favorite sex toy, just some simple basics.  

As for sexual decades: it was pretty great when I was writing Carrie in my 40s, but as we approach 80, there’s a new kind of beauty to it, for which we are profoundly grateful.         

Lola – I don’t know if you have kids or grandkids, but, if you do, do you have any regrets about writing erotica since they will probably eventually be reading your work? Do you ever look back and think, “That was fun to write, but, OMG! I should have never published that!”?

Molly – Our very smart son, a literature professor, has managed to be entirely circumspect about my erotica for the last 30 or so years. I have no idea whether he’s read them or not, which is just fine by me. And I’m guessing that his two astonishingly literate daughters will be pretty much the same.

Still, I do sometimes have second thoughts about my books — again, because they’re still out there, in a world where cruelty has been instrumentalized and eroticized. So sometimes I have to pick up one or the other of them and reassure myself that that’s not what I was doing — far from.

Lola – Last question. Not sure if you have had a chance to read or listen to any of HH’s writings about me/us, but if you have, any thoughts?

Molly – Only a few sentences, so I can’t comment. But I love the idea of you guys sharing an erotic and a creative life as a single enterprise. Way to go and wishing you all the best.

Lola – Thank you so much! This has been a rare treat!!!

Molly – Thanks to you as well. I’ve been kind of grieving the fact that I’m not writing any more. But your smart, engaging questions have helped me sum things up and to own the astonishing experience of writing these books.

Molly Weatherfield, author of Carrie’s Story and Safe Word, a.k.a. Pam Rosenthal Interview

Dear fans of erotica and romance, today we have a very special interview for you:

Pam Rosenthal, a.k.a. Molly Weatherfield – PART ONE – Carrie’s Story

 Pam/Molly is an award winning author in both the genres of romance and erotica! That  doesn’t happen to just anybody! I had just finished reading her first published erotica novel, Carrie’s Story, and I felt such a kinship with both the titular character and the author. I looked her up, reached out, and – to my great luck – she was willing to chat! Then she was willing to do an interview. Now, if you haven’t heard of her (and, I admit, I had only heard of her in passing about a year ago), you totally should have! Why? Because her writing – style, plot, characters, and basic command of the English language – put that other ho-hum popularizer of erotica/BDSM fiction to shame! That’s right, 50 Shades should have been called “50 Degrees Not-As-Good-As Molly Weatherfield!” Or maybe, “16 Years Late!” No, really! Anything that pale best seller had to offer was there in Carrie’s Story, and more – whoa so much more! Don’t take my word for it. Read both for yourselves and get back to me.

Luckily, some have seen the quality in Molly/Pam. In October of 2006, Playboy called Carrie’s Story one of the top 25 sexiest novels ever written! Number 12, in fact – just after Lolita (which, in HH’s humble opinion is the best erotica ever written) and just before Erica Jong’s Fear of Flying. Not too shabby!

Playboy’s 25 Sexiest Novels Ever Written

Number 12 – Top 50 Percentile

That’s not the only list she’s made. There’s also “33 of the Best Erotic Novels of All Time.” Now, if you read that list, you’ll see that it is hardly “of all time.” I mean, there’s nothing prior to Lady Chatterley’s Lover from 1929 on the list. But hey, “33 of the Best Relatively Recent Erotic Novels” just doesn’t have the same pizazz.

Speaking of lists, one particular author I know (in a Biblical way) made the list of ranker.com‘s “Best Sensual Fiction Writers” (even though HH isn’t writing “fiction”). We’d both appreciate it if you’d take a moment to vote us up on the list. Thanks!

Classic and Updated

Now, let’s get to the interview!

Carrie’s Story (updated cover)

Lola – OMG! It is such an honor to interview you! However, I have to be honest, so far I have only read your BDSM erotic novel, Carrie’s Story.  That’s why this interview is PART ONE.  I look forward to reading Safe Word and then having a second interview. And, maybe, when I can, reading some of your Romance work, like A House East of Regent Street, which you published under your own name, Pam Rosenthal. But tell me, what’s your background?  How did you get into writing?

Molly – I’ve always thought of myself as a lifelong English major, in love with reading and writing, and a little shaky in terms of earnings potential. For most of my life I managed to pay the bills as a computer programmer, which was hard, though also stimulating, pretending to have technical chops. Before Carrie, I never considered writing fiction; what writing I did was lit-crit or wonky nonfiction stuff, often about computers and science fiction, published in obscure leftwing venues, but pretty exciting to me intellectually and even artistically (I got the name Molly, for example, from the mirror-shades girl in the classic cyberpunk novel Neuromancer).

I’ve also been a feminist since I came to adulthood in the late 60s (I’m pretty old, as anybody who did the math can figure out). And I also had a secret passion for SM erotica, at least since high school when I somehow glommed onto the Marquis de Sade. Which two parts of my belief system weren’t easy to reconcile, especially since 60s-70s second-wave feminism was particularly disapproving of anything smacking of sexual “objectification.” 

But it was my great good fortune to be in the right place at the right time to begin to resolve my dilemmas. I don’t know if your readers will know this history, but in the early 1980s there was a big split among feminists called “the sex wars,” where some devastatingly brilliant women began to challenge feminist orthodoxy, and to insist that their erotic and affective lives, their role-playing, style of dress, (even their lipstick) didn’t invalidate their personal power. This might sound quaint to you, but for me it was huge when feminists started theorizing about sexuality, writing erotica, plumbing the boundaries of autonomy and desire. There was a lot of backlash; a friend, the late Amber Hollibaugh, was thrown off a panel at Barnard College for talking about butch/femme lesbian roles. But I was inspired, and had the good luck to meet legends like Susie Bright and many others, and to read great, smart erotic stuff — fiction and non-fiction both, which probably got my writing instincts going, though I didn’t know it yet.  

Lola – Carrie’s Story is. . . how should I say?  It pushes so many limits.  How did you hit on this story?  Did the character of Carrie come to you first or did the deep, dark adventures just unfold as you went along?  What was the creative process?

Molly – I remember the first time I tried to write an SM story. It was a lazy, sunny Sunday after sex, and I was feeling really good and loosey-goosey, which I guess freed up my thoughts in some way. So, when my mind drifted to SM fantasies — and then to the fears of fascism that sometimes also flowed in along with the sexual stuff — I felt a little braver than usual, a little less guilty and a little more adventurous. Maybe sex-positive feminist thinking had actually started to penetrate; in any case, I began to wonder whether I was really the sicko I feared I was. What would happen, I wondered, if I actually let the fantasies rip? What would they look like if I wrote them down (what a concept)? So I sat down to find out.

For hours. There I sat in my ratty pink terrycloth bathrobe, scribbling and smiling and just… happy. I totally didn’t know what I was doing — I even had to run to the bookshelf to see how to punctuate dialogue. And when I wrote COMMA CLOSE QUOTE HE SAID PERIOD, I felt like God.

The story stank, though it did have a character sort of like Jonathan and a few characters who found their way into Safe Word. But it was such fun, and I felt so much myself, that I was determined to keep writing, and maybe even trust my own moral sense. Because I found that in my fantasies, I was totally turned on — obsessed really — by the idea of mutual consent, and the subtle, interesting places that can take the imagination and the relationship. I’m interested in people playing power games, exploring strange places, but from a position of mutual agreement as to the boundaries of the fantasy space. I am absolutely not interested in sex where deep down (in like reality, like in government or the economy, or like on Jeffrey Epstein’s private island) the power is unequal. 

What was missing, of course, was Carrie. The smart-girl voice who’d been in my head since Jo March, and in western fiction since Elizabeth Bennet and Jane Eyre. The brave girl who fights the power with words and wit, and who can own the experience through her smarts. I realized I needed her to tell the story I was evidently dreaming up when I “heard” that voice in a fantasy novel called Beauty, by Sheri S. Tepper.

Anyhow, once I realized that Carrie would be telling the story, and that it was a story — that is, that she feels a need to tell us how she got to where she is when she’s telling it (which we don’t know yet, except for the auction, but which suggests a lot of SM tropes), I felt like I was cleared to go. That compulsion to tell how you got where you are is a powerful narrative engine, and I began to see how you could apply this to BDSM, with its tropes of training and discipline. Even if I didn’t know the ending, I felt that it would emerge in the telling. And oddly, the first publisher, Masquerade Books, caught the mood perfectly with the cover of the first edition: something about those wide light eyes, those parted lips (other Masquerade editions went way downhill from there).

Carrie’s Story – Original Masquerade Publishing Cover

Carrie’s Story, Most Recent (and Tame) Cover

Lola – You published this in ʼ94, so you must have been writing it earlier than that. Just to be clear – that was well before 50 Shades of Grey and its imitators took BDSM into the mainstream. Were you scared by what you had written? Did you think you’d ever find a publisher for it, or an audience? What was it like to be writing this stuff at that time?

Molly – I probably started writing it in ʼ91 or so. I was in no hurry, because it felt like its own reward to be exploring my fantasy life, opening up my imagination and sharing it with my husband, who began to share his as well. I don’t usually think of myself as brave, but I did while I was writing, and that felt amazing. And yeah, sure I was scared. “Always scared,” as Carrie says at some point. Because isn’t that what bravery is, to be willing to go where it’s scary? Isn’t that how we always get where we’re going, to find our limits as we go?

Still, I wasn’t writing in a vacuum. I was breathing the air of the San Francisco sex-positive feminist community, standing on the shoulders of giants, if you will. I was playing catch-up, reading lots of erotic fiction and theory, and adding a lot of stuff from my own reading over the years. And of course, since Carrie’s a brilliant, prodigy student intellectual, it all kind of fit together for me. 

As to whether I’d find a publisher: at first I really had no idea whether the thing was publishable. I thought the writing was good; I have a fair amount of confidence in my voice. But I didn’t know if my particular take on how body and mind work together would resonate with anybody else — and of course there’s always the fear of revealing oneself and grossing people out. “It’s a pure act,” I kept telling myself. “It’s its own reward.” And — certainly compared to Fifty Shades of Grey — the Carrie books are clearly a niche taste. But as the years go by, and as still, after 30 years, every so often I open my email to read some absolutely amazing, deeply thought communication from one or another reader, the thrill of making connection never gets old.

Carrie’s Story as I imagine it

Lola – The book, and its smart, sensual, and masochistic titular main character make frequent reference to erotica classics, most notably, Story of O by Pauline Réage.  What were the books that influenced you the most in writing this one and why?

Adaptation of Story of O

Molly – I’ve already mentioned the Marquis de Sade, who was in many ways a dreadful person, but I read bits and pieces when I was a teenager, and it stayed with me. A couple of years after that I read Susan Sontag’s essay, “The Pornographic Imagination,” and she talked about how porn is often funny, which gave me permission, years later, to make Carrie funny. Anyway, Sade is funny, in a weird, cold, whacked-out way (for more on this, for anybody who’s curious, you can read the piece I wrote for Salon.com, which is still kicking around the internet at https://www.salon.com/1998/11/19/feature_459/).

Histoire d Lo

Then, of course, Story of O, which came out in English in 1966, the same summer as Bob Dylan’s record Blonde on Blonde, which was the summer I connected with the guy I’ve been married to for more than 50 years now. We passed his copy of Story of O back and forth in bed. (And many years later I wrote about it, also for Salon, https://www.salon.com/1998/08/06/feature_12/)

Blonde on Blonde?

The next, important books came years later: Gayle Rubin, the brilliant queer theorist and cultural anthropologist, recommended Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty books, and I ran-not-walked to get hold of them. I think I’d find them unreadable now (all that spanking!), but at the time, I just gobbled them up, because I loved the equal-opportunity sexuality (women as tops and bottoms; gay and straight combinations cheerfully intermingling). And I loved the Disneyland fairy-tale setting. It was so light-hearted, so technicolor: I was totally energized by the idea of this sexual magic kingdom. 

Sleeping Beauty

There were also small-press books written by local (often queer) authors, that were super hot. Pat (now Patrick) Califia, Aaron Travis, Carol Queen, Thomas Roche, and Simon Sheppard are names that spring to mind, but there were lots more: San Francisco in the 80s and 90s was bursting with creative erotic imagination; I met Tristan Taormino at an open mic, for example. And this week I went to a Zoom memorial for the recently-deceased Dorothy Freed, a stalwart at erotic writers groups, whose memoir of her longtime, loving marriage to her BDSM partner, Life After Promiscuity, I totally recommend (I copy-edited it).

Perfect Strangers by Dorothy Freed

Lola – Though the story-line is fanciful, many of the scenes are ones that could have a basis in reality.  Were any of the sexy scenarios drawn from your real-life experience?

Molly – No. Sorry. My real-life experience is much more about subtle signals and shared imaginings. A funny thing, though, is that some people I used to work with as a programmer are sure they know who I took as my model for Carrie — and they won’t tell me who!

Porn inspired by Carrie’s Story

Lola – Did you dare show the novel to any of your friends, lovers, or family when it was still in manuscript form?  If so, how did they react?  And how did they react when it got published?

Molly – I’ve always been ridiculously, naively open about this stuff. There were some people who totally didn’t get it, but in general I received remarkably little pushback, and incredible help from friends who agreed to be beta readers, including the guy who corrected a quote from the Latin somewhere. My husband, in particular, is a tough, brilliant editor who pulls no punches and always helps me improve whatever I write. I even came out to my mother about it (a long story how that happened), though I strenuously warned her not to read the stuff. But when a piece of Safe Word got into some iteration of Best American Erotica, of course she read it anyway – the word “best” just being too much for her. “What did you think?” I asked her somewhat grimly. “It was Very. Well. Written,” she replied, through a jaw that might have been wired shut. And that was that.

Lola in her collar

Lola – Before this interview, you told me that the story never got optioned by any film companies.  It’s so cinematographic.  I could totally picture everything in my mind.  I am surprised no one offered that to you, especially after the box-office killing that the ho-hum 50 Shades pulled in. Any ideas why not?

Carrie’s Story definitely inspired many movies

Molly – I’m so flattered you think that, and I do think that one of the things I do well is move characters through imagined space. But as for actually making a movie out of it… maybe it’s better that nobody has. Carrie goes through a lot of stuff that would be far less engaging if you had to look at it rather than imagine it as told through her smart-ass commentary. Or as a leatherman friend once said to me, “Pam, pain hurts!”

Pain Hurts, but degradation?

Lola –  I’m sorry for the comparison and any spoilers, but, it seems to me the whole boring premise of 50 Shades is “Will she or won’t she?” sign the contract, that is. In Carrie’s Story, there is a contract, but the joke is that it’s all just cosplay, though the pain, degradation, abasement, and humiliation are real. However, Carrie can say no at any time. As I read it, I found it interesting to wonder, “How far will she go?” And it seemed to me like this was Carrie’s question too: “How far will I go?” And she goes pretty damn far! How did the plot drive the novel for you?

Molly – I think you’ve intuited what I’m going to answer. That the energy that makes the plot go was my energy, my curiosity about how far my fantasy life would go. You can’t fake that energy — or at least can’t.

Lola – I was so glad to learn that there was a sequel because, if I have any criticism of the book, it’s that it ended prematurely.  I wanted it to go on – so badly!  Just like I want this interview to go on.  I guess I have to get reading.  But, quick question, the audio book, narrated by Shana Savage, is just fantastic! Were you involved in choosing her for that format?

The only way to fly is listening to erotica

Molly – I was involved, and it is fantastic. Susie Bright, who produced the audio, let me choose between 3 finalists, and I chose Shana. And I’m so proud that in 2014 the audio book won an Audie award for best erotica — first time they gave an award for erotica.

Eargasms

Lola – Thanks again! We will continue this soon, I hope!!!!

Molly – Thank you, and hope to speak again.

Pam Rosenthal/Molly Weatherfield

 

 

The Golden Girls – Candi Annie

Cute Candi Annie

We’re starting a new category for this blog – “The Golden Girls” – that will feature sexy mature women (and their men).  This week we’re going to begin with a woman who has been in the lifestyle before it was called that.  Candi Annie was introduced to poly relationships real early and she hasn’t let up.  She’s in her sixties now and still going strong. If you like what you read and see, leave her a sweet comment.

Here’s the interview:

LOLA – Tell us about yourself. Where’d you grow up? Where’d you go to school? What did you do for most of your life? And how did you get into taking sexy photos and making sexy films?

Candi Annie in red

C.A. – I grew up in a small town in upstate New York and went to college in Boston- to a long gone, all girls college- Bay State Junior College. Getting away from all the limitations of a small town was an eye opener for me especially when it came to sex. I wanted to do it all and let all inhibitions go away. I tried everything I could think of sexually. A married couple that I actually “dated” at the time opened me up to not only the lifestyle having sex with other women which was great and sex on-camera. They actually arranged my first venture into hardcore porn for my eighteenth birthday where they bought me a ticket to LA to be in a “professional” porn shoot. It was so exciting and fun! My life took a turn after college and I had one bad relationship after another and my sexuality was put on the back burner for a number of reasons.

Unfortunately, the “professional porn shoot” pics are lost, but Candi Annie has tried to make up for it in later life.

Candi Annie with AARP volunteers.

Candi Annie getting off

LOLA – Where did you meet your husband and how did you two grow into the lifestyle you lead now?

C.A. – I met Al on the island of St. Croix where he was living and I was getting away from a cold New York winter and another bad relationship. We hit it off immediately! We talked for hours just walking around under the warm tropical night it was so amazing to find someone that I could tell everything to and he did not judge me. That openness is what solidified our relationship from the beginning. He never thought of me as a slut or anything like that, neither of us were virgins, what BS! He was excited to know of my previous experiences and was always wanting to know what made me feel good. The first time he went down on me it was electric, my most amazing orgasm in years! The sex just kept getting better and we were like 20 yr olds having sex 4-5 times a day. We never really thought of the lifestyle since our sex lives were already great, we just didn’t need it. But early on erotic photos did add some excitement and kept that “spark” alive.

Candi Annie with a friend at home.

Candi Annie likes to dress up to go out.

Candi Annie hitting on the staff.

LOLA – I can’t believe you’re sixty! You look great! Any special hints for preserving that beauty – both in terms of your face and also your great body?

C.A. – I am getting older and I certainly see the wrinkles more and more but I have always believed in good fast paced walks 3-4 times a week, nothing crazy and frankly speaking we still have sex every day- usually wake up sex that is usually all oral. I wake up to Al licking my pussy and after I reach my orgasm, Al brings his cock to my mouth and I “milk” him. Maybe that has something to do with all over health too, a big mouthful of cum everyday! I have to admit I crave the taste!

Candi Annie says, “A load of cum in the morning keeps me looking young!”

Candi Annie, “Next!”

Candi Annie is an inspiration to Lola Down

LOLA – I’ve noticed that most of your posts are with men and mostly older men. What are you into – men, women? Would you enjoy being with a younger man or woman?

C.A. – Older men just seem to be more caring and sensual. Ever since I visited those adult theaters in College where older men surrounded me and fondled me in such an erotic and respectful manner that I never felt uncomfortable. I would enjoy one after another but they were never forceful or disrespectful. They wanted to see me enjoying myself as much as they wanted to get off! That theater is where I met the male half of that couple I mentioned earlier. They took me under their wings and introduced me to so many exciting sexual things. Age did become an issue as we went along since I was actually only 16 when I met them but we had a great couple years and all involved had a great time. I have absolutely zero regrets!

Candi Annie camping

Candi Annie greeting the neighbors at the campground

Candi Annie has been around since before women shaved the bush

LOLA – What are your kinks, fetishes, and taboo interests?

C.A. – I think I have done them all! At this point meeting fun, interesting couples to explore with is all that is left on the bucket list. To have other couples that are well traveled open, loving but are sensual, compassionate, respectful and more on the professional and quiet side is our primary interest now. We are beyond the wild loud parties and really tired of rude, crude and pushy guys.

Candi Annie working from home

Candi Annie ready for her next Zoom meeting

Candi Annie prepping for that big presentation.

Candi Annie waiting for your call

LOLA – How long have you done this – the sex posting – and how long do you hope to keep it up?

C.A. – We started posting erotic photos about twenty years ago and without doubt it has kept the spark in our relationship! Truthfully I think this may be my last year unless perhaps the financial side improves, our sex life is great and I think the couples – swingers resorts and cruises etc will be our focus moving beyond this year. Not everything has to be on camera.

Candi Annie camping again.

Keep going Candi Annie!

LOLA – Top bucket-list sex fantasy?

C.A. – Tops is to find those elusive perfect couples to explore with! They should both be Bi, as well as the previously mentioned prerequisites. Age is irrelevant as long as everything else comes together, but it will take a “mature” couple to hit it off with us- that is an attitude not an age.

Candi Annie looking great!

LOLA – Books, movies, TV shows, and other porn stars you like?

C.A. – As far as pornstars- Nina Hartley is my long time crush and with her age she just gets more impressive. I am somewhat of a John Grisham fan and read most his books . Love erotic tales as well and of course Match, Cinder & Spark books! For TV shows I love comedy!!

Nina Hartley back in the day

Nina Hartley looking hot!

Nina Hartley timeless!

LOLA – What’s your relationship with your fans?

C.A. – I have some amazing on-line lovers! It is such a turn on for me to know the men masturbate as they watch me and cum as they think of me. If that is not some kind of LOVE I don’t know what is! My biggest thrill is to receive video tributes that show them masturbating as they watch my video and end with a huge flow of cum going all over the screen! As far as meeting in person, I am very careful and let Al deal with that. I like the fantasy that I share with my lovers on-line and living up to that in person does not always work out. They have thoughts of what I am like and I love to share and let their fantasy continue but meeting the real me can let them down and that frankly terrifies me. It happened once many years ago where we met a couple in Newport, RI where we were living at the time they wanted to get together with the point to see about moving forward with an intimate relationship. The female in that couple backed out saying I was too old and not what she expected. I was devastated and that put our swinging hopes on hold for years. I now hope to just be at a resort or on a cruise where we just happen to met the right couple that we hit it off with! As for single men – it is even more difficult – rude and crude scare me! – in person anyway… on-line it is fine!

Show us some love! Send your cumtributes for Candi Annie and Lola Down to me: downloladown@gmail.com

LOLA – What’s next for you?

C.A. – More of those cruises and hope that destiny will show us the swinger way!

LOLA – Where can we see more of you?

C.A. – My main content site is: https://candiannie.com
it is forwarded to sheer currently: https://www.sheer.com/Candi-Annie
most free content: https://www.xvideos.com/candi_annie_official
latest videos and custom work: https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/437396/candi-annie/Store/Videos
always some here: https://xhamster.com/users/newbiecpl4u
others would be newbienudes and adultism plus…

social sites:
Twitter “X” – https://x.com/anniecandi73578?lang=en
Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/candiannie.bsky.social
Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/user/newbiecpl4u/?rdt=48390
MeWe: https://mewe.com/candiannie.27/posts
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61557639365527
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/candi_annie69/

If you want Candi Annie to keep doing what she’s doing into her 70’s, support her content!

Thanks so much Candi!!!!

Bye for now Candi Annie

A Woman’s Touch

Lola came home from the sperm donation clinic in a very horny mood, as you might expect.  She told me all about it as I pounded her from the top, her legs spread, both hands down between her legs spreading her pussy as wide as it would go, inserting her eight fingers on either side of my cock in order to feel as full as possible, and squirting nearly continuously the entire time, soaking the bed and me.

Lola Bed Spreading panties on

Lola Bed Spreading no panties

When we were done and she had caught her breath, she relayed a little coda to the story.  When she returned inside the clinic to grab her coat, she spoke to the receptionist about the possibility of. . . well, you know what?  I don’t want to spoil the surprise, so I’ll just cut to the next time Lo met Terence at the clinic.  Oh yes, there was a next time.  Did you think there wouldn’t be?

They met in front of the clinic just like the first time.  She greeted him, taking his hand in hers, standing on tiptoe, giving him a kiss.  In the cold air, their breath created a small cloud before their faces.  She let him see her breasts under her coat.  This time she was wearing a turquoise blouse.  It wasn’t transparent, but it was thin.  No bra.  Hard nipples in the winter chill.  He liked what he saw.  They entered the clinic and were greeted by a different, yet also attractive, receptionist.

The Masturbatorium Staff, Ellie, second from right in front.

Terence gave his name, received the specimen cup, and was told to proceed to room #3 again.  Lo said, “Wait here,” as she removed her coat and hung it up on the coat rack, just like last time.  She rejoined her companion and they walked together into the collection room.  This time Terence was immediately set on his heels by two framed posters of Lola hanging on the white walls of the small room.  They were exactly where the posters by Roy Stuart hung last time they were in room #3.  The poster right in front of them was of Lo, bent over, heaps of cum dribbling out of her well-used pussy.  The second poster was to their left and it was nearly all a classic black-and-white.  Lo was lying on her back, her legs spread, copious cum dripping out of her pussy, as her manicured fingers rubbed her clit and her other hand played with her nipples.  The poster was artistically accented with the pink of her fingernails and the pearls of her bracelet popping in color against the desaturated shades of grey.

Lola Poster

Lola Poster Cream Pie

“Is, is, is that who I think it is?” asked Terence.

Lola smiled mischievously.  “Who do you think it is?”

“I think it’s you.”

“You would be correct.  Do you like?”

“Very much,” he said, nearly panting.  “But. . . ?”

“Remember, last time, when I asked what you thought of the poster and you said. . .”

“Oh, I remember,” he interrupted.  Lola didn’t need to remind him.

“Well, I just thought the place could use a little bit of a woman’s touch.  You know?”

“But how did you. . . ?”

“I just flirted with the girl behind the desk a little and then asked her for a favor.”

“Really?”

“Yep.  Apparently it’s pretty popular.”

“Your poster?”

“Yes.”

“How do you know?”

“You see, it has the name of the blog on it?”

“Oh yeah.”

“A number of guys who have jacked off in this very room have contacted me.”

“Why?”

“To send me cumtributes of course.”

“A cumtribute?”

Lo couldn’t believe his naïveté.

“A cumtribute is a photo that a man or woman, or sometimes a couple or more, take where they show themselves getting off to my pics.”

“Oh,” he said, surprised.  “Do people do that?”

“A lot of people.”

Tribute photo from Purple’s Gem

“It’s like a kink?”

“Yes.  You have your kinks, they have theirs.”

“I could probably learn to like that kink.”

“I don’t think it would take you too long to learn.”

“I’m a quick study.”

“Speaking of kinks, let’s indulge in yours.  Ready?”

“Um, yeah!”

Lo put on the latex gloves and this time she had Terence undo and pull down his pants while she lubed up her right hand.

He sat down again and she grabbed his drooping cock in her palm.

“What does HH think of it?”

“Of what?” she asked, looking at him in his face as she absent-mindedly stroked his flaccid meat.

“Of, well, of your poster being up here.  He knows, doesn’t he?”

“Actually, no.  I didn’t tell him.”

“You didn’t tell him?!”

“It slipped my mind.”

“How does a thing like that slip your mind?”

Lola looked down, studying the project at hand.  He was growing, but still not hard.

“I guess I was busy with other things.”

“Does he know about the cumtributes?”

“Oh yeah.  I mean, he knows that I get them.  I suppose he doesn’t know about the ones I received recently from, well, from this room.”

Ellie reading from Match, Cinder & Spark to Terence while she coaxes his cum for a donation

Lola thought of all the guys who had jacked off in this room, jacked off looking at her poster, and the handful of them who had sent her photographic evidence of it.  It turned her on.  It probably turned her on more than Terence was turned on at the moment.

The Donation Station

“He knows you’re here with me right now, doesn’t he?”

“Oh yes.  I made sure of it.”

“What does that mean?”

“I like to tease.  I told him what I was going to do, where I was going to do it and with whom.”

“But he didn’t know that I’d be staring at your naked photos.”

“They don’t seem to be doing the trick.”

“Sorry,” he said, blushing.  “I guess I’m talking too much.”

“Oh, it’s ok.  I like talking. . . about me.”

“Did you pick out the photos?” he asked, looking at them again.

“I did.”

“Why did you choose these?”

“Well, the director specifically instructed Courtney. . .”

“Courtney?”

“The cute brunette behind the reception desk last time.”

“Oh, I know Courtney.”

Courtney

“I’m sure you do.  Anyhow, through her the director was very clear that I was only allowed to put up photos of myself if they included cum in them.”

“In them, or in you?” he asked.

“In, on, whatever.  What do you think of this one?” she asked, pointing to the small framed photo of her bent over in her tight latex pants with a puddle of cum on her ass.

Lola Cum Covered

“I’m hard already!”

“Yes,” she said as she looked at his erect cock, “finally.”

She stroked him as she watched how his stomach muscles flexed.  She added, “I guess the director knew that seeing a woman with cum on and in her can act as a form of encouragement.  I read somewhere. . . now where was it?  Oh yes, in the book Insatiable Wives – have you ever read it?”

“No, I’ve never heard of it.”

“Oh, it’s a great read.  It’s about, well, about hotwives, like me.”

“I’ll pick it up.”

 

 

 

 

Insatiable Hotwife Lola

“Anyhow, I read in that book that studies show men who see other men – or was it apes? – anyhow, males, let’s just say, who see other males fornicating with a female produce more sperm.  I think that’s why the director wanted sperm included in the pictures.”

“Makes sense.”

“Do you feel like you’re going to produce more sperm today?” she asked, looking down again at her hand pumping his hard, but hardly explosive cock.

“To tell you the truth. . .”

“Yes?”

“I’m really enjoying this.”

“Enjoying what?”

“You, touching me, talking to me while you fondle my cock and balls.”

Lo grabbed his left arm with her free hand and turned it to see his wristwatch.  “You’ve got about fifteen minutes.  You going to make it to the finish line?”

“Oh yeah.  I will.  You do this to HH?”

“Frequently.”

“How frequently?”

“Whenever I’m on my period.”

“You going to do it to him tonight?”

“Not if you take your full half hour to cum.  I’ll be getting a wrist massage,” she said, pausing in her pursuit of his happiness and grabbing the lube to lube up her left hand.

“Oh, sorry.  Maybe I should just get down to business,” he said, contritely.

“What will make you cum and cum quickly?”

“Well, if I could see your tits.”

“I guess you can’t see my tits in this poster, huh?”

“Nope.”

“But you can in this one.”

“Yes, but only in black-and-white.”

“OK then.  But my hands must remain sterile, so can you unbutton my blouse?”

“My pleasure!”

Slowly he undid each button, one-by-one, as she continued to manipulate his joystick in her slippery, gloved hand until the two sides of the blouse were hanging freely, as were her breasts.

“Beautiful,” he sighed.

“You like?”

“Yes.  God yes.”

She moved closer to him so the nipple of her left breast was a mere finger’s breadth from his lips.

“You may kiss, if you like.”

“And suck?”

“And suck.”

He latched on and she enjoyed it.  She released a long, guttural moan and the sound of her pleasure brought him to climax.  Unfortunately, Lo was lost in the sensation of his warm lips on her still chilly breast and didn’t immediately react to the ejaculation by having the collection cup ready.  He came on her.  On her stomach and on her black skirt.  Once she felt his hot cum making a mess, she jumped and fumbled with the jar.  She managed to collect just a fraction of the total discharge.  It would have to do.

She sealed up the cup and removed her gloves.  She used her index and middle fingers of her right hand to swipe up a good amount of the ejaculate on her torso and she slowly opened her mouth, stuck out her tongue, and placed the dollop in her mouth.  She swallowed and smiled.

“No one needs to know,” she said with a wink.

She buttoned up, wiped off her stained skirt, and walked to the receptionist’s desk.  She gave the cute receptionist the jar and grabbed her coat.

“Oh, Ms. Down,” said the receptionist, just as Lola was putting her arm through the crook in Terence’s arm to walk out together.

“Yes?”

“The director asked if you would kindly stop in to see him before you go.”

“Me?”

“Yes.”

“Gladly,” she said.  “I mean, if that’s ok with you, darling,” she added to Terence, as if they were a couple.

“The director!  But of course!” he said with great enthusiasm.  “I will miss you at home,” he added, leaning in for a passionate kiss before parting ways.

Are you hear to donate?

Digital Inspiration

It appears that word got out about Lola’s “immoral support” of Ted, the “known donor” for our friends Gina and Cam.  You see, a while back Lo “encouraged” Ted’s selfless sperm donation.  I’m pleased to say that the process eventually proved successful.  Gina and Cam are now the proud parents of a baby boy!

They are so proud that they have told a wide circle of friends and acquaintances all about the method by which they got pregnant, including Lo’s special role in it.  One morning, out of the blue, as Lo was scrolling through her long list of long dongs, micro penises, clits and tits to get herself off, she got a message from a stranger.  That’s not too uncommon, but this stranger knew our friends Gina and Cam and he had an unusual request.

His name was Terence and he was a man in his mid-thirties.  Like most of Cam and Gina’s friends, he wasn’t straight, but he wasn’t out as gay either.  He, like Lola, identified as “queer.”  But he wasn’t just queer, he had a downright perverted side to him.  There were a lot of things that he enjoyed doing to get himself off, but I’ll let those unfold as we get to them.  At this point, the one kink that he revealed to Lo was pertinent to the ask he had of her.

“I go to the sperm bank regularly to make a donation,” he said.

That’s quaint, thought Lo, as first.  A good Samaritan who, like a blood donor, gives of himself for others.  Not quite.  It turns out he likes to go there in order to wank in a public setting.  He likes the thought that the receptionist knows that he is jerking off in the room next to her.

This revelation really turned Lo on.  She had never thought of that possibility before.  Whenever she had thought of a sperm bank, which, given Lo’s predisposition for naughty imaginings she had thought of on occasion, she only thought of guys going in there embarrassed, a little humiliated, and bashful.  She hadn’t entertained the idea of a quasi-exhibitionist being turned on by the thought of everyone knowing from the outset what his particular purpose for visiting the clinic is and that, when done, they all know for certain what he had just accomplished.

She was intrigued, to say the least, and she carried on a lengthy correspondence with him.  He told her that he had been doing this on a regular basis at the same collection clinic for months now.  He also mentioned that – by design or happy coincidence – all the nurses at this clinic are very attractive and that he had built a special rapport with one of them named Ellie.

He told Lo how Ellie always works the closing shift.  For convenience, the collection clinic is open from 8:00 a.m. to 9:30 p.m.  They found that they get more people willing to donate after work hours.  She is the only staff on site, except for the security guard, after five.  He had made it a regular habit to donate when she’s working and she has taken some liberties with the rules.  It started out that he noticed her flirting with him.  Then, one week, he found a photo of her on the top of the pile of magazines.  Each week the photo she placed there got a little bit more risqué.  One week, when he exited the collection station room, he apologized to her and said, “I made a little mess.  I missed the target and spilled some semen on your, I mean, the photo in there.”

She gave him a knowing look.  He imagined, but couldn’t confirm, that she went into the room after and got the cum-covered glossy photo of herself and did something with it.  The next week he found she had left a nude photo of herself.  He made sure to make a mess of that too and apologize again.

Within the month, she was in the collection room with him, jerking him off.  She began by merely stroking him.  But then it progressed to her stroking him and reading passages from books and blogs.  At one point, she read to him from Match, Cinder & Spark.  She was already familiar with Lola and me because we had written about her in the post, “Triangles of Sadness.”  After she broke up with Steven, she actually became infatuated with Lola, even though Lola was the cause of her breakup.

Ellie & Steve before the breakup

It was a small world because she also read the story about Lola: “ICI – Home Insemination with a Known Donor.”  Terence realized that this Lola Down was the same person that his friends Cam and Gina had told him about.  Now he had her email address (through the blog) and he reached out to her.  Having learned about Lo’s personality, he wisely included some sexy selfies.

Terence expressed his kinky wish to Lo.  He knew that this donation clinic allowed for wives or significant others to accompany the donor in order to help with the donation process.  He wanted Lola to pose as his girlfriend for that purpose.  And, he wanted to do it during the day shift when his special nurse wouldn’t be there and so the nurses who didn’t know him would now be aware of exactly what he and Lola were up to in that room.  It was an extension and variation on his fundamental kink which was simply jerking off in a room merely a few feet from the nurse who knows what he’s doing and then seeing her face afterwards.

Perhaps unremarkably, the exotic and extravagant nature of this kink turned Lo on.  She spent many nights whispering in my ear, asking me what I thought it would be like for her to do this for Terence because, you see, Terence had just donated and so now needed to wait a couple of more weeks before he could schedule to make his deposit with Lo’s assistance.

Night-after-night she tantalized me by masturbating in the bed next to me, looking at Terence’s photos – which only got more explicit and, according to Lo, more hot, each day – and telling me the narrative of how she would like the session to go.

Lola looking at cumtributes.

Finally, the big day came – and so did Lo, many times that morning before she left our warm bed to meet Terence at the fertility clinic.

It was a bitterly cold day.  We had been in the grip of a cold-snap for two or three days already.  Lo had spent at least an hour prepping for her little lab-assistant role.  She tried on at least five different outfits, asking me each time, “What do you think about this?”  I loved each one, but as soon as I said so, she found it objectionable for some reason and started anew.  Finally, she decided on a short skirt, black nylons under it, no panties.  A black, mostly transparent, crepe blouse, no bra.  Over that incredibly hot outfit, she draped her long, heavy white coat and put on her knee-high leather boots.

Lo getting dressed for “work”

I was desperate to have her.  Every outfit change, she stripped back down to nothing at all and it was too much for me to bear.  I was hard and suffering and she made me sit through the entire process.  Not that I was complaining, but it was a form of sexual torture.

She left me high and dry with the instruction that under no circumstances, was I to masturbate.  That is pretty much a standing rule, but she knew how hot she had made me for her and she knew she’d want all that pent-up energy for herself upon her return.

Just like that she was off!  She was to meet Terence at the clinic.  Separate cars.  This was not a date.  Lo was very clear about that.  This was a clinical assistance project.

Whatever she wanted to call it, she arrived before Terence.

Lo waited in the car.  She could see her breath as she waited.  She touched herself between her legs, gently stroking over the nylons.  She liked the feel of the nylon as it rubbed against her pussy and clit.  She was getting wet.  Her warm wetness and the dropping temperature in the car was stimulating her between her legs.  She knew she wouldn’t be able to wait much longer.  Either he had to arrive or she’d have to “go all the way” with herself.

She saw Terence walking in the parking lot.  “Good,” she thought, “because any longer and I’d cum right here and who knows?  Maybe I’d squirt and it would freeze!”

Lo practically leapt out of the car and met him.

“Hey,” she said, trying to play it cool.

“Hi.”

It was awkward, but only for a moment.  Lola grabbed his hand.  “We’re supposed to be a couple, right?”

“Right,” he said.

They walked together into the clinic.  They stopped at the reception desk.  Terence flashed a cordial but gregarious smile at the woman sitting behind counter.  He introduced himself and said that he had an appointment for noon.  The woman typed something into her computer and then smiled back.

“Yes, room three,” she said, looking at Lola who had opened her long white coat to reveal the transparent blouse underneath it.  For a brief moment, Lola thought she had overplayed her hand.  The receptionist typed something into her computer and then looked up at Terence and Lo.  She said, “Ah yes, I see you have already entered the information about your service assistant.”

Lo tried to smile politely at the woman, but she felt as if “service assistant,” sounded too much like “service dog.”  But then Lo’s mind went to that kinky area (which is about 99% of her mind) and she began to think what it would be like to have a “service dog” to service her in the manner that she was about to service Terence.  Lo was already getting wet.  Or, wetter, I should say.

The receptionist passed a collection jar to Terence and also passed him an individual sized, complementary miniature tube of special lube that would not contaminate the collection sample.

“Do you need instructions?” she asked as she handed the lube to Terence.

“No, I’ve been here before.”

The receptionist gave him a knowing look and then went back to her typing.

Terence casually led Lo down the white, sterile hallway and to room three.  All along the hall were posters of Roy Stuart’s photos.  Terence opened the door and let Lo in like a gentleman.  In the little white room was a sink, a small white shelf next to it, a comfortable chair, a small TV screen with a CD player, some porno mags under the TV and more framed Roy Stuart posters on the walls.  Lo also noticed a large, coffee table book by one of her favorite photographers, Sabrina Dacos.

Roy Stuart Photography

Roy Stuart “Glimpse”

Sabrina Dacos Selfie

Sabrina Dacos tits and shaved snatch

Lo looked around, taking it all in.  She was even more excited now as she imagined all the men who had been in this room and what they were doing there.  Sex, in all its permutations and manifestations, holds a perpetual allure for Lo.

One thing that Lo’s keen observation of the room and its objects didn’t see was a coat rack for her white overcoat.

“You sit down.  Get comfortable,” she said to Terence.  “I’m going to find a place to hang up my coat.”

She turned back around and went out to the receptionist.

“Excuse me,” she said as politely as she could, “but is there a place for me to hang my coat?”

The receptionist pointed her down a different hallway.  “Just to your left,” she said.

Lo walked down that hallway and, to her surprise, she saw framed posters lining it with images by David Hamilton.

David Hamilton’s Laura

Art by David Hamilton

She saw a line of coat hangers along the far wall and she hung up her coat.  Walking back towards the receptionist – the building was shaped like an ‘L,’ with the receptionist at the intersection of the two perpendicular wings – she said, “I didn’t know you had a children’s section.”

The receptionist looked up, blank-faced.  She saw Lo’s prominent breasts, nearly naked, just under the loose-fitting sheer black blouse.  She merely opened her mouth, making a little pout with her lips.  Lo wasn’t sure what to make of it, but she took it as a compliment and walked past her proudly.

Lo breezed by a single man in the hallway who was also on his way to a different room.  Lo made clear and unambiguous eye contact with him.  However, his eyes quickly looked down and settled on Lo’s tits.  Lo could understand the allure to both working there and going there as an exhibitionist like Terence.  There was something exciting and stimulating for Lo knowing that the man she passed in the hall was either about to go jack off or had just finished.  And it excited her for him to know that she was roaming the hallway in search of stimulating some eager altruist ready to selflessly give his essence to some needy couple.  Lo walked briskly, keenly anticipating her part to play with Terence.

Terence was now sitting in the chair.  Lo looked at him.  He smiled at the sight of her in the blouse.  Lo had expected he would be naked, or at least pantless by this point, but he was just sitting there, clothed as he was when Lo went down the hall.  He also wore a wide grin on his face, staring at her tits and then her eyes and back to her tits.

“So,” said Lo, “how do you want to do this?”

“I guess, if you just unzip me, pull me out, lube me up, and I’ll take it from there,” he said.

Lo pulled out two sterile latex gloves from the box on the counter next to the Sabrina Dacos book.  She put them on and then unbuttoned Terence’s pants, unzipped the fly, pulled them down around his ankles.  He was already hard and bulging from under his tight white underwear.

Lo pulled down the underwear and his long, thick dick sprung out like a Jack-in-the-Box.  Lo marveled at its size, shape, and apparent eagerness to donate.

“You like?” he asked.

“MmmmHmmmm,” she moaned.  Her face was only inches away from the specimen and, had they been in another setting, she would have taken the meat in her mouth with relish.  But she could not do that, lest the donation become contaminated and useless.

“Anything in particular that will help you?”

“Can you get naked?”

“No,” said Lo, as if offended.  “This is not for pleasure.  This is a selfless act of generosity to both science and humanity.”

What a load of malarkey!  Did she actually believe that?  No.  It was part of the game.

“Then,” he said a bit disappointed, “can you at least stand close to me?”

In point of fact, she was actually standing right next to him.  He sat.  She leaned over and held his cock in her gloved hand.  She was bouncing it on her fingers to see just how rigid, weighty, and stiff it was.  Then she put a heaping dab of the lube in her palm.  She slowly applied the lube to his shaft, deliberately stroking up-and-down, base-to-tip, a few times before setting to work in earnest.  She began vigorously jerking him off.

“A little slower,” he requested politely.

She shifted into a lower gear.

“Like this?” she asked.

“Yeah.”

“What are you thinking about?”

“Your tits.”

“Say more.”

“I want to suck them and lick them.  Those nipples under your blouse – God!  They look amazing.”

She leaned in a little further so that the apex of her breasts were mere centimeters from his lips.

“How long does it typically take you to cum?” she asked.

“I masturbate a lot,” he said.

“That’s ok.”

“So it takes me nearly the full half-hour.”

The rooms were assigned by half-hour increments, but the staff preferred if donors were faster so they had proper time to clean up and disinfect each room when done.

When he said this, Lola took it as a personal challenge.  How quickly could she get this compulsive masturbator to ejaculate?

“When’s the last time you came?” she asked.

“This morning.”

“What?!  I thought they only allow you to donate once every two weeks because if you did it more often it lowers the sperm count.”

“Yeah, that’s a dumb rule, isn’t it?” he said, looking at Lo, their eyes and mouths very close.  “I mean, they can’t monitor or control what happens at home.”

“What did you cum to this morning?” she asked.

“Thinking about you doing this.”

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“And, in your imagination as you were at home in bed jacking off, what did you think would happen?”

“Can I tell you the truth?”

“Yes, please!”

“I was jacking off in bed next to my sleeping wife.”

“Your wife?!” asked Lo, still stroking up-and-down, “You’re married?”

“Yes.  You didn’t know that?” he said, looking directly at her now.

“No, I didn’t know anything about you except that you heard about me through Gina and Cam and what you’ve told me.”

“Are you upset?”

“No, not at all.  Why should I be?”

“I don’t know.  Maybe you think I’m a perverted, sleazy, creep.”

“Why would I think that?  Because you’re married and go to a sperm bank to get off and you masturbate in bed next to your sleeping wife?”

“Well, uh, yeah.  When you put it that way.”

“Don’t.  Everyone has their kinks, their quirks, their turn-ons and offs.”

“Really?”

“Of course.”

“I mean, I know that, but you don’t think bad of me because of it?”

“Of course not.  In fact, it turns me on that you were jerking off next to her.”

“It does?”

“Yes,” she said, adding pressure to her grip and speed to her stroke.  “It will turn me on more if you told me what you were thinking about as you did it.”  She brought it back to this because he was losing his hard-on with all the conversation.

“I was thinking that you’d get naked and let me feel your body, maybe let me suck your tits, and. . .”

“Now, now,” said Lo, putting a damper on his hopes, “that would be against the rules.”

In point of fact, there were no rules other than not contaminating the sample by coaxing it out either orally or vaginally.  But no rules were in force to stop Lola from getting naked.  She just liked enforcing arbitrary rules.

“Too bad,” he said.

“What do you think of that?” asked Lo, indicating the Roy Stuart poster in front of them.

Terence glanced up at the brunette in the frame and then looked deep into Lola’s eyes and simply said, “I wish it was you.”

That little comment put an idea in Lo’s head and she felt herself gushing from the thought of it.

She started moaning as if she were the one receiving the erotic massage and the auditory stimulation really got Terence going.

“Are you wet?” he asked.

“Yes.”

“You like stroking me?”

“Mmmmm, so much.”

“You want to see me cum?”

She just bit down on her lower lip and this was enough to bring Terence to the brink.

“Quick!  The specimen jar!”

Lo grabbed it as Terence took matters in his own hands and aimed right at the small target.  Out came loads and loads of cum – more than Lo had ever seen before in one orgasm.  If she was gushing just a moment ago, now she was a full-on leaky labiator.

“FUUUUUUCK!” cried out Terence, certainly loud enough for the receptionist to hear.

“That’s a boy,” encouraged Lo, dropping to her knees as if wanting desperately to be the receptacle for his deposit, as if worshiping his cock and potency, as if weak in her knees from the visual excitement.

When he was done, he cleaned up the bit he spilled or dribbled down his leg and then he pulled up his pants, zipped up, tucked in his shirt, and made himself generally presentable.

Lo and Terence emerged from room #3 and walked to the reception desk.  Terence dropped off the collection container and the receptionist looked up without any expression on her face.

“All set,” said Terence.

“All set,” the receptionist replied with a polite smile.

Lo was holding Terence’s hand as if she was his girlfriend.  She returned the polite smile to the receptionist and the two of them walked out into the freezing cold.  Lo’s nipples became like diamond cutters immediately and she squeezed Terence’s hand and said, “You go on home.  I forgot my coat!”  She gave him a loving kiss, open-mouthed, and squeezed his hand before turning around and going back into the clinic.

Terence waited a bit in the parking lot, but when Lo didn’t come back out for a while, he figured he’d better drive away before he looked like he was stalking her, or someone else at the clinic.  After all, his car was on, the windows were fogging up, and it was clear from the exhaust that he was just idling in the parking lot outside the front doors of the sperm donation site.

Send Lo your cumtribute.

Totally Taboo: Interview with Hani Miletski

WARNING! THIS POST MAY NOT BE FOR YOU. IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT, JUST IGNORE IT.

But, it may also be educational for you.

Statue of “Lola Takes a Lover” surrounded by art of Lola on the Left and Right, and MILF Meri, center.

Totally Taboo

For all you devoted readers of MySexLifeWithLola, you are probably aware that some of our posts are on the more risqué side of sex blogging.  Various of our friends – MILF Meri, Lilly, and even Lo and her sister Robie – engage in sexual practices that are not to everyone’s taste.  We have heard from a lot of you and, for those of you who love these relationships and those of you struggling, we bring you this insightful interview with the pioneer researcher and therapist of some of the most ticklish taboos: bestiality and incest.  Consider this your trigger warning.

Taboos – Popular, Hidden, and Unthinkable – and Interview with Hani Miletski:

In her groundbreaking work on Mother-Son incest, Hani Miletski says about her study that it “provides arguments to support the assumption that the apparent rarity of mother-son incest has more to do with society’s inhibitions and inability to accept the fact that this form of incest exists than with the actual taboo’s strength.  It is as though the taboo is about preventing the belief that mother-son incest exists rather than about preventing it from actually happening.”  Over a hundred years since Freud’s famous “Seduction Theory” shocked the Victorian Age by suggesting that incestuous relationships (mostly involving minors and abuse) happened far more frequently than anyone suspected or was willing to admit, society is still unwilling to admit one form of incest – that involving a desiring mother.

Match, Cinder & Spark on Audible dot Com

Mom & Daughter have “the talk.”

Mom & Daughter

In addition to Miletski’s work, there is also the fine scholarship done in 1992 by Beverly Ann Ogilvie who wrote The Experience of Mother-Daughter Incest, and one earlier work, from 1987, by Karen Louise Kenney, who wrote, Maternal Incest: An Annotated Review of the Literature on Mother-Daughter and Mother-Son Incest.

Desiring Moms

Crime & Punishment

Taking the taboos of society one step further, there is the radical study by Miletski, Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia, in which she engages in primary research with 26 men and 6 women, all of whom engaged in some degree of bestiality and/or zoophilia.  The research was undertaken to understand these people and how they understand themselves.

MILF Meri and son

If you’re interested in this work, then you will want to read this brief interview with Miletski.

  1. You really tackle the most difficult, taboo, and even repressed topics – Mother-Son incest and bestiality. Why? What originally got you interested in these topics?

I like to research topics that I don’t know much about.  It makes any research project much more interesting.

Mother-Son Incest started as my master’s thesis.  I was doing my MSW at Catholic University in DC, and I knew I will be pursuing my certification in sex therapy as soon as I graduate.  So, I wanted my thesis to be about some topic related to sexuality.  But, being at a Catholic university, I couldn’t write about orgasms or erectile dysfunctions, for example, so I chose to write about sexual abuse.  My advisor wanted me to be more specific, so I chose incest.  That was not specific enough for my advisor, so I chose mother-son incest because I had never heard of it at that time, and I was thinking that my thesis will end up being about why mother-son incest never happens, until I started researching it…

Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia started as my doctorate dissertation.  At that time, I was already working as a sex therapist, and one of my clients was into sex with dogs.  I had already started researching the topic because I didn’t know what to do with her, so when it came time to choose a topic for my dissertation, that was an obvious choice, as there was really nothing out there about people who cannot stop thinking of, and wanting to, and having sex with animals.

Lola and Woman’s Best Friend

  1. What was your approach with that patient who was into sex with dogs then and how would it be different after you did your research?

My approach has not changed.  I believe the most important thing as a therapist is to be non-judgmental, open-minded, empathic, curious, attentive, and supportive.  The answers to any questions/problems come from working together with the client, as a team, as we explore various possibilities until we find the best solution.  In my client’s case, she felt extreme shame about her behavior, and she wanted to stop having sex with dogs, but could not.  I helped her realize and accept that this was a sexual orientation that she, obviously, did not choose for herself.  I helped her realize and accept that she was not doing any harm to the dogs (she only had sex with male dogs – they were penetrating her).  And I helped her learn how to be careful so she doesn’t get caught.

Movie Poster from a mainstream movie about bestiality

  1. You mentioned that you had been turned down by at least ten publishers. Did you find it difficult to get your work peer reviewed and published? What sorts of obstacles did you face? What did publishers or even your colleagues say about your work?

I tried to get the book Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia published, but no publisher wanted to touch this subject.  They simply told me that this is not a topic they were interested in, so I ended up self-publishing the book and I have not tried to get it published by a publishing house anymore.   This was 22 years ago.

My colleagues were against my writing my dissertation about this topic, let alone publishing it.  They thought it would pigeon-hole me and it would make potential future clients shy away from seeking my help.  I obviously did not listen to them.  There were probably people over the years who did not contact me for this reason, but the people who did always told me that they felt comfortable telling me all their hidden secrets because if I could deal with bestiality, I could probably deal with everything else.

Art by Pulpbrother

  1. In Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia, you explicitly open up the question as to bestials or zoophiles being a “sexual orientation.” But you don’t ever take that approach with the mother-son study. Do you think that there is a certain contingent of women out there who are only attracted to either their children (sons, daughters), or to young people? In the wake of every sensational news story about women who seduce minors, especially if the perpetrator is attractive, like Debra Lafave, people always ask, “Why would she do that if she could get anyone she wanted because she’s so beautiful/sexy?” But they don’t seem to understand that it’s not merely about getting physical sexual needs met. What do you think?

Debra Lavave and Ex-Husband, Owen Lafave

Debra Lafave

Debra Lafave

Not Debra Lafave, but purported to be.

Tampa, the Novel inspired by Debra Lafave

I believe there are women who are sexually oriented toward minors, just like some men are.  I honestly never thought about a sexual orientation toward one’s own children, but I guess anything is possible.

  1. Have you read the book Tampa? If so, what are your thoughts?

I have not read this book, but just from the write up about it, it looks like a similar story to the Mary Kay Letourneau scandal, in the early 90s.

  1. When you published Mother-Son Incest in 1995, were you aware of or had you read Beverly Ann Ogilvie’s 1992 study, The Experience of Mother-Daughter Incest? If you’re familiar with it, what similarities and differences do you find in the two taboo relationships?

Mom & Daughter Tease

Unfortunately, I have not been aware of this study.  I was aware of Rosencrans’ (1997) study of 93 daughters and nine sons who had been sexually abused by their mothers.  Nine men heard about her study and asked to participate in it.  She ended up adding a chapter in her book (The Last Secret: Daughters Sexually Abused by Mothers) about these nine men.  Although all nine men admitted to having had incestuous relationships with their mothers, 89 percent of the sons (eight men) believed they had a normal childhood, compared to only two percent of the 93 daughters.  All nine men felt they were their mothers’ lovers and did not perceive themselves as victims.

Mom & Daughter

  1. When you did your study on bestials and zoos, you mention a few times about how new the internet is and how new you were to it. Since then, the internet has developed quite a bit. Have you seen what people are posting now depicting bestiality? What are your thoughts?

Knotty Fairy getting off to Lola

Last I checked, it’s all about pornography.  All the online groups/listservs/websites/etc. that used to be around when I was doing my study, they all disappeared.  The ones that came after, came and went.  They always face threats from outsiders and sometimes even from within the community.  It’s a shame.

Fan pic, getting off to Lo

Fan pic, getting off to Lola

Fan Photo Getting off to Lola

Fan Photo, Getting Off to Lo

Fan Photo, Getting off to Lo

Fan Photo, Getting off to Lo

  1. Desiring women have become more prevalent in popular culture, whether we’re talking Frankie Shaw’s character in MILF, Mary-Louise Parker’s character in Weeds, Zooey Deschanel’s character in The New Girl, or Y tu mamá también. All these popular shows include the desirous dimension of women in ways that were taboo not long ago. Do you think that, as a culture, America is ready to explore the famous “dark continent” of women’s sexuality, as Freud called it?

Marie-Louise Parker

Frankie Shaw of SMILF

Frankie Shaw, SMILF scene

SMILF with Frankie Shaw Look Carefully and you’ll see what gets Frankie Shaw off.

Zooey Deschanel

I think this question is too theoretical.  I think the U.S. has come a long way regarding the acceptance of women’s sexuality, but the U.S. is very large, with a huge population, many various cultures, and countless opinions, so I would not attempt to make such a guess.

Art Appreciation 101 – The Minotaur

  1. Both bestiality and mother-son incest are among the more prevalent themes in Greco-Roman mythology. How do you account for that?

Meri and son – very Oedipal

They are among the most taboo in practically every culture.  The more something is taboo, the more curious people are about it.  It’s human nature.  And, by the way, these two themes are also among the most popular pornographic themes and the most visited sites.

  1. One of the most obvious, yet least discussed, images of mother-son incest is in the depiction of Venus and Cupid/Aphrodite and Eros.  They are considered mother and son and often depicted in sexually suggestive poses.  Given that these are the mythical origins of sexual desire, do you think there is something deep in our psyche that ties sexuality with this primary relationship?

There probably is something deep in our psyche that ties sexuality with this primary relationship.  I talk about it in my book.

From the Bible – Lot and His Daughters

Sisters – Lo and Robie

  1. What about mother-daughter incest?  Though you call mother-son incest “the unthinkable broken taboo,” wouldn’t mother-daughter incest, since it is almost never depicted (in myth, legend, art, or psychological studies), be even more “unthinkable” for that very reason?

Very possible.  In my book/thesis I was focusing on mother-son incest, but that does not mean that mother-daughter incest is not, or maybe even more, unthinkable.

MILF Meri

Still Crazy After All These Years!

You might think that the title of this post is referring to HH and me, your beautiful blog bunny, Lola. Well, it’s not. It’s referring to an inspiring older couple, Mr. and Mrs. E, who have a Just For Fans site that is just amazing!

Mr. E is a talented artist, and his talent shows in his photography. Mrs. E is his muse and a beautiful model. Together they are a couple that other kinky couples can admire and hope to inspire.

The Mrs. is a fan of Match, Cinder & Spark!

Here’s my interview with them:

Q: I went through your whole Just For Fans. It looks like you started back in late 2019, but you migrated there from Tumblr. When did you two start with the erotic photography?

A: Mr E: I wanted to show her, how erotic and sexy she was/is… so we played around just for us. Watching the pictures on big TV-screen and having fun.

Mrs E: Very often the shoots lead to passionate fucking sessions.

Mr E.: Around 2015 I discovered tumblr. – that was great, you could post uncensored, had great style, nice Archive. Perfect – We had 85K Followers, when the tumblr purge started. They deleted our blog – with 12K pictures…

Mrs E: He was devastated… we were devastated… than MeWe came along, they also deleted some blogs…

Mr E: Then I was looking for a safe haven… where we could keep the nerds and idiots out. The money (it’s only 1/10 of what we (mostly me !) spend on lingerie…) – One platform we like, but lately problems with the followers counter, is X formerly Twitter…

Mrs E: I love to see the posts on the big TV-screen, also after every shooting…

 

 

 

Q: I was going to say, it looks like you spend a lot on lingerie! Was it a fetish for both of you, or did you both grow into it? Does Mr E ever like to wear the lingerie? (BTW, that’s a BIG turn-on for me – men in panties and nylons, etc.)

A: Mrs E: I always loved lingerie, but Mr E really got me into it…

Mr E: I was always a big fan of stockings and garters and nylons, and for the shoots I was looking for nice stuff… from every business trip she got some pieces…

 

 

Q: I see that Gunter Blum and Roy Stuart are featured in some of your photos. Are they big influences on either of you? Who else is an influence in the photos you take?

A: Mr E – Artistic and aesthetically a lot of artists had an influence on me… photographer: beside the ones you mentioned, are H. Newton, Araki, Knoll and others…

Mrs E: I loved it when he brought the newest LEG SHOW issue home…. great inspiration…

 

 

Q: For Mrs E: I see in some of the photos images of you apparently getting off to other photos of sexy, scantily clad or naked women. Are you into women? More generally, what are your kinks and do you have sex with anyone besides or in addition to Mr.?

I think she’s into Lola Down

A: Mrs E: I have a lot of close female friends, love to look at sexy women, but I’m not into women. We had some experiences with other couples (not really satisfying) and few MMF – one was fine, but from far away… He loves to fantasize about us with another man…

Q: Well, I will admit, I wish it was my photos all over the wall in this beautiful picture! (wallpaper)

A: Mr E: that’s a funny crazy story: coming home from a business, she surprised me with a Paperwall (between a door) covered with this porn collage. It was a Lucky Hole!!!!

Q: Do either of you care to share how it came about and what inspired it? (Squid photo)

A: Mrs E: Mr E loves to cook! Holidays on a Island with a great population of these delicious animals made us fantasize… btw. it was delicate cooked… lol –

Q: Tell me, what are your hopes, dreams, plans for the future with regard to the erotic photography? Do you think you’ll make a book of it?

A: Mr E: We don’t plan to much, as long as we love what we do, we carry on… and yes a book is one of our opportunities… or NFT… but all is vague…

Q: I see in one of the photos, she’s reading “Talk Dirty to Me.” What sort of erotica do you two (or each of you) enjoy? What sort of porn? Do you like to masturbate together or alone or both?

Favorite Erotica? Match, Cinder & Spark

A: Mrs E – I read everything from classic erotic literature to pornographic texts. But I like it best when he reads to me, his dark erotic voice turns me on… I like looking at other women, old Leg Show magazines or artistic pornography. That’s why our favorite go-to erotica has been your Match, Cinder & Spark books! Every now and then we watch porn together, sometimes just as a silent background wallpaper.

Mr E: I am well-educated in pornography. LOL – I’ve always been interested in the history of pornography. As a media person, I’m a porn gourmet, even if I enjoy home cooking now and then. I read a lot, including theoretical writings on pornography, so it was obvious to try to create aesthetic pornography yourself.

Lola: Thank you both for this interview – it was such a turn-on to talk with you and to learn from you!!! We both wish you two the best with your erotic adventures!

Go check out Mr. and Mrs. E at stillcrazyafteralltheseyears on Just For Fans!

Interview with Author, Dominatrix, and F-Girl Emme Witt-Eden

This week our good friend and talented writer, Emme Witt-Eden, a.k.a. “Mysterious Witt,” became a full-fledged author with the publication of her memoir: Confessions of a Middle-Aged F-Girl. (You can read our review here.)

She was generous enough to sit down with us for an interview about the book, writing, marriage, and of course, sex.

Promo for Confessions of a Middle-Aged F-Girl

 

L – Congrats on your new book, Confessions of a Middle-Aged F-Girl! And thank you for letting me (or us – me and my man, H.H.) read it ahead of time to write a review. We loved it! We each devoured it in about three days. When we got together to talk about it, we devoured each other. What a sexy ready. But it’s also so personal – I mean, it is a memoir after all. Since it is a memoir, as opposed to an autobiography, it only portrays a sliver of your life – from the time your marriage fell apart to your emerging as a self-aware, self-confident f-girl. Tell us how you’d characterize yourself in your marriage and before. I mean, in the memoir you say you “claimed” your sexuality, not “reclaimed it,” because you felt like you never actually had it to begin with, but what was your sexuality (real and fantasy life) like before?

EWE – Ha-ha! I wouldn’t characterize myself as a completely self-confident f-girl in my book. I was still suffering from quite a bit of insecurity and was working my way through this throughout the entirety of the book. But I did definitely find myself again through sex, even though I still met with other challenges, such as some bad matches in bed and a guy who totally broke my heart.

But back to the other part of your question. I would say that my sexuality has fluctuated quite a bit throughout my life. I was very prude and full of shame in my younger life, even if I had sex for the first time at 15. I really didn’t enjoy penetration and a lot of it was because I felt like I was doing something bad. I come from a very conservative family and sex was always framed as something that I was giving up to a man who would use me if I wasn’t careful (and prude). And even after I got married, I should still feel shame surrounding sex, because my parents definitely treated their sex life – or what I knew about their sex life – in that way. Sex was something to hide at all costs, they were not going to talk to me about it, and I was not allowed to ask about it. I hate to say, but as I came into my own as a young woman, I suffered quite a bit from the mother wound, meaning my mother had a very negative view of sex, and I, sadly, adopted that.

I only started to open up – sexually speaking – when I became a dominatrix after college (pre-marriage!). But I didn’t see that job as sexual. I thought domming was just about treating men like garbage. (If you’d like to learn more about this era of my life, please read my newsletter The Accidental Dominatrix.) Nevertheless, my job as a pro-domme helped me deal with some of my shame. Little by little, my body image improved, and I started to explore myself sexually. And yet, during that time, I still maintained the belief that I had to keep my body count low or no man would ever want to commit to me. I did not embrace, nor did I completely own my sexuality, in that era, though I was on my way to getting there. This is why I say that I only finally “claimed” my sexuality after I left my first husband, as even when I was working in the sex industry as a dominatrix, I was still quite prude and felt like I was always at the mercy of men whom I let have so much control over me emotionally.

Fortunately, after my divorce, I finally worked through these issues. Finally, I was able to enjoy sex just for sex – and that was incredibly liberating! In that regard, I say that I finally “claimed” my sexuality. I hope that makes sense.

And…. to fully answer your question, I would say that I did have some BDSM fantasies even when I was working as a pro-domme. I had the desire to be dominated, but for the reasons I explained, I wasn’t ever able to experience it in a satisfying way. Back then, kink wasn’t viewed as it is today, as this fun thing that’s pretty benign, just a way to spice up sex. Back then (this was the 90s), kink was seen as a pathology. Though I had kink fantasies, when I would tell my lovers about them, they always thought I had some sort of mental issue. This was extremely painful and I’m very glad that we’re much more open today about the healthy, normal reality of kink.

A little cross-endorsement from Emme Witt-Eden

L – You’ve been in the lifestyle for some time now. As I recall, you used to not show your face in your posts on Medium.com and other social media, but now you do. Does this mean you’re “out” to your friends and family? And, I guess most importantly, does your ex-husband David know about this memoir?

EWE – Yes, you’re right, there was a time when I didn’t show my face because I was very keen on protecting my family from scandal. LOL. But seriously, I have kids whom I wanted to protect. I was also protecting my conservative family from embarrassment and pain. I’ve already been told that I’ve hurt my family. Quite a few of my family members know about my dominatrix past. It’s just so much pressure on me to feel like I’m bringing people so much pain just for exploring and writing about my own sexuality. I know this sounds crazy! But to make everyone happy and to keep the peace I once decided to hide my identity.

Not just that, there’s a part of me that likes privacy. I have a social life with other parents from my kids’ school and I just don’t feel like having to explain some of my life choices to these people. And I think many of us are like this. We have a face we show one set of friends and colleagues and a face we show another. We might have a professional face that we show our workplace friends, but they don’t know what goes on in our bedroom. I’ve happened to have chosen to make a profession out of what goes on in my bedroom and so it’s created this tension. A lot of people are simply not the appropriate recipients of the spicy news of my sex life. So, when they find out about it, I have to first listen to their judgments, and then decide whether we’re going to continue to be friends. This has basically resulted in me having much fewer friends, because, as a rule, people are very close-minded.

A couple of years ago, when I decided to show my face, several things had happened. I realized that I wasn’t going to get ahead in my writing career unless I started revealing what I look like. And when I did, I knew I would lose people. And so I basically had to get to the point where I was so tired of hiding parts of myself that I realized it was better to lose everyone. I’m just not interested in perpetuating the balancing act of ensuring certain people like me by hiding so much of myself. I’m finally ready to own up to who I am and that’s why I started showing my face. Of course, I still write under a pseudonym for now. Part of that is to just protect myself from trolls. It’s a crazy world out there, I’ll tell ya. Oh, and David does know I’ve written about him. He doesn’t care enough about my writing to give a crap, though. God, I’m glad we’re divorced.

L – Are your kids old enough to know about your “alternative” lifestyle? Have you told them or did they find out? Or will you be telling them at some appropriate time?

EWE – My kids still aren’t old enough and it’s really not appropriate for me to talk about it with them. However, my second husband, the man whom I’m currently married to, really applauds the way that I talk about sex with my kids. I’m very open and I talk about sex in a very calm and clinical manner. I don’t clam up and feel shame or tell my kids to stop asking questions. My current husband wasn’t like that with his kids and so he looks at my openness as this wonderful thing. I am able to guide my children as they learn about their sexuality, and I can do this in an open and honest way. And that is the result of the life I’ve led. But when the time is right, when my children older, I will tell them more about my life. I no longer feel shame. I’ve led the life I have because I’m curious and felt like a major part of my humanity was basically off-limits to me because I’m a female. I simply decided to explore those taboo territories. There’s nothing wrong with that.

Emme Witt-Eden

L – In the book you mention taking a creative writing class (and crushing on the professor). Would you workshop your erotic stories in the class, or did you keep it PG for the other students (and the hot professor)?

“Hey Emme, where you going?”
“My creative writing class.”

EWE – Hells no, I never workshopped my erotic stories in class. But I was writing a novel about the implosion of my marriage. It was basically a thinly veiled memoir, and a couple of those chapters did make it into Confessions, though in different form. I published a lot of the other stories under a different account on Medium. Yep, I get around… But no, I have never workshopped my erotic stories, and honestly, even my novelized stories have scandalized people. Sometimes I really hate other writers. I find writers to be the most conservative group of creative people. Musicians and visual artists are so much more chill.

L – What inspired you to turn your shorter works of writing into a book-length memoir?

EWE – Once again, I felt like I could get farther ahead in my career by actually having a book. A book gets people’s attention the way shorter pieces don’t, even though my shorter pieces have been quite lucrative. But writing a book is also a huge risk. If a shorter piece bombs, it’s no big deal, you just write another one. If a book bombs, then you’ve spent quite a while writing it and that sucks. Fingers crossed this project does well.

L – Care to share some of your favorite authors and/or books?

EWE – In the last year, I’ve been reading a lot of Annie Ernaux, Virginie Despentes, and Guadalupe Nettel. In my heart, I’m a literary fiction fanatic. Oh, and Maggie Nelson’s books are the bomb.

L – Care to share some of your favorite erotic authors and/or books and/or porn?

EWE – I like Japanese porn a lot because the actors tend to look like they’re actually enjoying the action, instead of just acting for the camera. American porn is so histrionic with the actors acting so fake, continually looking toward the camera because they know they’re being filmed. It’s obvious it’s a performance, and as a female, that’s a turn-off for me. Men probably don’t notice it, but I do. I’m not sure how you categorize your Match, Cinder & Spark series, but your man, HH, writes some of the best erotica I’ve read! And the photos and art of you are – well, let’s just say “inspiring”!

Emme Witt-Eden getting off to Match, Cinder & Spark, Volume V: Shorter Shorts, in public. An author, avid erotica reader, dominatrix, and exhibitionist!

L – I noticed in the memoir that, with all the f-girl shenanigans you got up to, there was no girl-on-girl, anal, bondage, or water sports. You make it very known in the book what you do and don’t like. Are those not on your kinks list or did you grow into them later?

EWE – Oh, there was a little bit of bondage in the first chapter of Confessions. You’ll have to wait for the girl-on-girl action for the new book I’m writing. In terms of anal, that’s not something that I typically engage in as a hookup, so there wasn’t much in this book. Luckily, my current husband is the one who gets to enjoy having his dick up my ass. In terms of water sports, that’s something I explored as a dominatrix but honestly, I’m not really into that.

L – What advice, if any, would you give to young married mothers who are in committed, but rather unstimulating relationships, somewhat like you were in just at the start of the memoir?

EWE – My advice? Well, they committed to this guy for a reason, so they might as well make the best of it. I would advise doing everything they can not to let the passion die. I would schedule date nights and sex. A lot of people don’t like to schedule sex because they think that’s not romantic. Well, this is just the way it is once you get married and have kids. We can no longer drop everything and have sex whenever we want. So schedule sex. Don’t, and watch the passion fizzle away.

Then again, if you’ve tried everything and it’s still not working out, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with considering a divorce. That or an open marriage. Non-monogamy is no longer perceived as the crazy thing it once was, so I think it’s a great way to deal with mismatched libidos

L – Any bucket list goals you hope to achieve this year?

EWE – I really want to get the sequel of this book done!

L – What can we expect from future publications by you?

EWE – You can expect my second book in this series: Confessions of a Middle-Aged F-girl in Costa Rica. And then my third: Diary of a Middle-Aged Sugar Baby.

L – Thanks Emme! We cannot wait to see those books come out as well as a prequel about your time as a dominatrix!!!

You can find Emme Witt-Eden, a.k.a. Mysterious Witt here:

F-girl dating Instagram: @mysterious_witt

Kinky consultant Instagram: @emmewitteden

www.emmewitt.com

Interview with Porn Star Hotwife Sara Anne and her Husband

Interview with Porn Star Hotwife Sara Anne and her Hubby

Hotwife Sara Anne

LOLA – Sara Anne – I’m such a BIG fan!  I’m so glad you agreed to this interview.  And I’m really glad the interview with “After Hours Radio” came out first so I could listen to it and come up with some interesting questions based upon what I’ve learned about you and your hubby.

That said, first question: Not sure if you’ve raid Rated X by Maitland Ward, the former “Boy Meets World” star, turned adult film star, but her story reminded me a lot of you.  She was brought up with strict and conventional notions of sex and, though not a prude, she documents the long journey for her personally and professionally to get from where she was to where she is now.  What was your upbringing like and how did you get into making your own adult content?

Maitland Ward from her “Boy Meets World” days.

Maitland Ward Cute Ginger

Maitland Ward getting off to mysexlifewithlola.com

Inspirational Maitland Ward

Maitland Ward in Blacked ‘Unprofessional’ (Photo 004)

S.A. –  I was raised in a Catholic household that didn’t really talk about sex or educate me on sex and sexuality.  My father was verbally abusive and, as such, I no longer have a relationship with him and sadly my mother passed suddenly over a decade ago now.  I barely even kissed a boy before I was 17, but once I did the floodgates were turned loose and I lost my virginity on the cliche prom night.  From there, I experimented with a lot of different guys and by the time I met my husband I was already well into double digit numbers.  On our first night together we both said we were the best each other ever had and we were soon married after that.  It was not long after our marriage that my hubby said that I was so good he had to share me with his friends.  While I was reluctant at first, eventually I did start having sex with him and his friends at parties.  After several years of experimenting with the “lifestyle,” hubby started filming me with other men (with their permission of course).  We showed it to some people and they liked it, so we shared it on social media and before long Amature Pornstar Hotwife Sara Anne was born!

Sara Anne

LOLA – One reason Maitland Ward reminded me of you was because she talks about how, when first getting started, her husband was the camera man.  Question for you, Hubby: Did you frequently fantasize about Sara Anne being with other men (and women), or how did that come about?  Does it turn you on now to see her with other people making porn?

Dirty Girl Sara Anne gets clean.

Hubby – I did!  From the first time I was with her, I thought she was so good that I couldn’t keep her all to myself and I wanted to share her with my friends.  I also knew her “number” and knew that even though she swore she could be “faithful” I would never have wanted that for her.  Why would I take away something from her that she has enjoyed doing so much and was so good at?  I’ve always said, Sara’s men are like going to an amusement park.  She has a favorite ride (me), but she still wants to ride all of the other rides and why would I ever deprive someone I love so deeply of that.  In turn, she has remained “faithful” to me for nearly 20 years now.  We are one of the closest couples you will ever meet and we are definitely each other’s forever.  I still fantasize about her with other men and the only porn I ever watch are her films.  I truly enjoy watching her work her craft and getting it on film for the rest of the world to enjoy as well.  Someday I hope that managing her career and filming her will be my only job.

Taking it hard, Sara Anne

LOLA – Would you, Hubby, ever consider being in a film or photos with Sara Anne?

Hubby –  If you have a keen eye, you can find parts of me in many of her films.  However, for now, my face cannot be shown for business related reasons.  Someday though, I’ll make my first full appearance!

LOLA – I heard on the interview with “After Hours” that one of your “friends” found out about the porn and then outed you.  Can you describe what that was like?

S.A. –  Extremely stressful at first.  We had to do damage control when we first found out that our “friends” were telling all of our other friends about it.  Long story short, ultimately all of our friends told us that they kind of suspected all along but that we had never made them uncomfortable in any way and that they knew we were good people and that it really didn’t change anything about our relationship with them.  We actually did not end up losing a single friend over it and now it’s fun to listen to them ask questions and joke with us about it.

LOLA – You said in that interview that one of the things you had to do was tell your sons about your new profession.  I think you said one of your sons is 16.  How old are they?  And what was their reaction?

MILF Sara Anne

S.A. –  In attempting to keep my family protected and out of the story as much as possible, I will say one is late teens and the other is mid 20s.  The older was okay with it, but didn’t want to know any more.  The younger had a lot of questions but ultimately is also “cool” with it and now can’t be blindsided by friends finding out and not being prepared with a response.  He has even joked with me a couple of times about it.  It did not change our relationship with our children in the slightest and, in fact, I think they are more open and honest with us now that we have been transparent with them.

LOLA – What do you think of the term “MILF”?  Do you think that your sons’ friends (or their parents) see you that way?

Taking it Doggy Style Sara Anne

S.A. – LOL….  Hubby has always considered me a Mom I Love to Fuck.  I honestly try to stay detached from their friends’ parents because I don’t want one of them recognizing me and making things awkward.  When I do interact with them, I’m usually not as glammed up as  you see me on film or photos so I don’t honestly know if they consider me a MILF or not.

LOLA – What are some of the reactions that you’ve received from friends and family when they found out about your work?

S.A. –  As mentioned before, everyone has been very supportive after asking a million questions.  They have seen how strong our relationship is and how well we get along, so it’s hard to argue that we are doing anything wrong.  It’s been over a year since it all came out and I feel like everything has just gone back to normal. . . other than the occasional joke or question now and then.  We both like that we don’t have to hide it any more.  It’s like a huge weight lifted off of our shoulders.

Hot Wife Sara Anne ready for a hot night

LOLA – Hubby, have your guy friends had any response about what Sara Anne does?  Do they say things to you like, “I wish my wife did that” or “Your wife is so hot!  I saw her in the last video and. . .” ?

Hubby –  Honestly, believe it or not, all of my guy friends have been very nonchalant about it and it rarely comes up.  The plus side is when she or we are trying to pick someone up while we are out, we don’t have to sneak around about it anymore.

Midnight Swim with Sara Anne

LOLA – Any negative or judgmental reactions from friends or family?

S.A. –  Honestly, none.  We had one couple that initially did not want to be friends with us any more, but after about six months they decided they missed us.  Our other friends had told them nothing has changed and they realized they were wrong to react the way they did.  We got together and talked it out and now are back to being good friends again.

LOLA – Ever have a screening at your house for friends and family before the video is released?

S.A. – Never, and I don’t think we would ever try to do that.  Just because they are okay with it doesn’t mean we want to shove it in their face.

LOLA – Do you come out of a session with another man and ever go home and, when having an intimate moment with your hubby, tell him how amazing it was?  What is his reaction?

“Can’t wait to tell hubby about this!” – Sara Anne

S.A. – Oh, one of our rules is that he always wants all the details and I happily oblige him.  I enjoy seeing how much it turns him on to hear me talk about it and when the story is done, both of us love him “reclaiming” me.  Sex is never better than when hubby goes last and I truly don’t feel satisfied until I’ve had him after being with another man.

LOLA – Hubby, do you have a preference to see Sara Anne in a scene with another man, another woman, or with multiple men?

Hotwife Sara Anne Smiling

Hubby –  YES!  LOL.  I just enjoy seeing her have fun and seeing her smile, whatever she is doing, whether it’s sex or riding amusement park rides or singing karaoke, her smile means everything to me.

 

Hot Wife Sara Anne having fun.

LOLA – Sara Anne, who are or were some porn stars you admired or got off to either past or present?

S.A. –  Believe it or not, I don’t watch much porn and never watch my own films.  I enjoy having great sex and getting it on film.  I occasionally will do some light research with hubby for ideas for new material, but in general I prefer to make my own fantasies come true rather than watch other people on film.  We both also prefer to watch it live when we do, which is why we love to attend lifestyle parties and enjoy the show that we get to see.  Live porn is always better than screen porn!

LOLA – Hubby, if you’ve been reading what HH writes about me, and I’m not sure if you have, then you know that one of my kinks is turning on married men who have beautiful wives.  I include you in that category.  Any thoughts about me?

Hubby – I said before, the only porn I ever watch is Sara Anne’s, but that doesn’t mean I don’t read it!  The stories are hot and I think it would be incredible to film you and Sara Anne together.  It would be called MILF and Nymph.

Yes, Hotwife Sara Anne is a Cumtributing member of The Match Book Club!

LOLA – Sara Anne, as you know, in my relationship with HH, I’m allowed to play, but he is not.  I get incredibly jealous.  But for you, if the roles were reversed and Hubby was doing the adult films with other women, how do you think that would make you feel?

S.A. –  In the beginning we were strictly a Hotwife couple and I wouldn’t have dreamed of ever sharing him.  I always felt that he would find something better, but over the years he convinced me that he was never going anywhere no matter what.  Eventually we did change to a full-swap couple, although he still prefers to just sit back and sip some bourbon and enjoy the show I put on for him.  While we have made the transition to full-swap, it’s same room only and I can’t imagine a scenario where I would be fully okay with not being there while he was with another woman.  He has and does let me play with other men by myself and perhaps that is just because he has that much faith in us, but in recent years we pretty much only play together.  It’s about enjoying each other’s pleasures together rather than trying to get something from somewhere else.

LOLA – Sara Anne, what was the most fun you’ve had doing this?

S.A. –  Oh wow!  It would be hard to say exactly, as there have been so many different fun experiences.  The first time I squirted, the first time I got DVP’d, my first gangbang. . . and so many more!

LOLA – Do you do this for the money, the fun, or both?

S.A. –  Well Hubby doesn’t see a dime of my income and lets me spend all of my “porn money” on whatever I want.  Of course I use it to buy gifts for him, but mostly it’s to support my “vanilla hobby” (which I will keep private for now).  So yes, the money is nice, but I did it for fun for almost 13 years before I ever made a dime.  It was due to sheer boredom during the pandemic that I found OnlyFans and started my account in May of 2020.  So yeah, it’s always been about fun, but the extra income is really great too and I want to especially give a shout out to my fans who realize that while this is a lot of fun, it’s a lot of work to also bring my films to life.  So, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU to anyone who has ever donated their hard earned money to enjoying watching me do what I love.  It means the world to me and motivates me to keep going for as long as you want to see me having fun with my clothes off!

Sara Anne sucking cock

LOLA – Best part of this job?

S.A. – Being a happily married woman who still gets to experience the entire world of sex that is out there.  I am a proud SLUT and have always said that word stands for “Sexually Liberated Unlike Them!”

L – Worst part of this job?

S.A. –  Trying to find people who are willing to be on camera with me!

LOLA – Would you say you ooze confidence, that this work has made you more confident, or that you struggle with confidence to get naked and have sex with strangers?

S.A. –  I am definitely not a confident girl and that dates back to my upbringing and early boyfriends.  I was also a late bloomer, so no one ever told me I was attractive until I was in my early 20s.  I’m actually extremely shy when you first meet me and am not good at small talk.  That being said, I think I know that I am really great at sex and I’ve been hearing it my entire life, so I honestly have zero issues meeting someone one minute and have them fucking me silly the next.  When it comes to sex, that is where my confidence lies!

LOLA – Gang bang, glory hole, bukkake goals for a film?

S.A. – I have one gang bang in the books (hopefully you have seen it) and another scheduled tentatively for this summer. I’m not opposed to glory hole or bukkake, but again its finding the guys willing!

LOLA – Any kinks or fetishes that are a real turn-on or turn-off for you?

S.A. – I’ll start with turn-offs: anything to do with anal sex.  I’ve tried with professionals, it’s just not a pleasure zone for me.  My pussy is pretty amazing and allows me to orgasm in multiple ways multiple times.  Even the hint at backdoor play turns me off and will get me out of the mood really quickly.  As for turn-ons and fetishes – Oh please creampie me!  I don’t know what it is, but I love when a guy creampies me and especially a new guy!  Sex isn’t complete until I can feel their cock swell inside me just before their cum explodes in my pussy.  I love the new warm wetness its creates and I always orgasm hard instantly as soon as I feel it and it’s the very best way to finish sex with me.

Do not accidentally go in the wrong hole!

Hubby – My biggest turn on is just seeing her naked.  It’s also great watching her with other men and I also love when she adds a new guy to her list.  We have a running joke that when she’s done and the guy has left or we are on our way home, she gets a big hi-five from me.  I know we are always looking forward to the next one!

LOLA – Do you still masturbate and, if so, to what?

S.A. –  I do, at least a few times a week and honestly it’s more about relaxation for me, so I don’t really masturbate to anything in particular.  If hubby is available, I just ask him to fuck me (which he always does), but if he is not around I have my Battery Operated Boyfriends to keep me company.  If anything, it might just be that I saw a hot guy on TV while I was at home alone and if the time is right, I’ll get myself off!

Hubby – Sara learned a long time ago to never let your man leave the house hungry or horny, so she keep me pretty well drained.  After I found out a few years ago that it turned her on to watch me masturbate, I usually only do it when she is present and, in fact, I can’t remember the last time I did it on my own.

LOLA – Best sex of your life?

S.A. –  Any of the countless times with hubby.  He is and always will be the best because he knows what I like and knows how to hit all the right buttons.

Hubby –  Oh definitely Sara Anne.  You have seen her films and that’s what I get to have sex with regularly!

LOLA – I’m a bit of a size queen myself.  I LOVE an unusually long and thick cock.  What about you?

S.A. –  While I have never backed down from a challenge and have had some massive cocks inside me, I honestly prefer an average 6-to-8 inch guy.  I’m a small girl and I have a very naturally tight, wet pussy, so I can’t work with the big ones as well as I can with one that fits nicely in my “hot pocket,” as hubby calls it.  If you watch my films, I think you can see how much more I am capable of doing with an average guy versus a huge guy.  That doesn’t mean I’m not willing to try them all, but I just enjoy it more with an average sized cock.

LOLA – I also find micropenises fascinating.  Ever been with a guy you just couldn’t even feel?

S.A. –  I have, but just one guy a long time ago.  I’ve been pretty happy to discover that in my triple-digit cock experiences they have all been average to above average.  But there was that one guy. . . I just couldn’t even feel it!  I honestly felt terrible for him, but I did let him finish and he did give me great oral, so while I never tried it again, I can still say I had fun.

LOLA – Favorite movie, novel, or television show?

S.A. –  Movie – Steel Magnolias.  Novels, almost anything Stephen King.  Television show?  Depends on my mood, but either “Friends,” “The Office,” or “Supernatural” are always on in the background in my house.

LOLA – Pornstar crush?

Angela White

S.A. –  Right now, I’d love to work with Johnny Sins!

Johnny Sins, Angela White, and Lola on TV

Hubby –  Besides Sara?  Right now, Angela White!

LOLA – Would you recommend this lifestyle to couples?  Why or why not?

Both – It’s not for everyone, as we have found, but those who figure out how to do it and put the jealous feelings aside will find that it makes their relationship closer than any you will find in the vanilla world because you have to have 100% trust and honesty at all times.  The moment you lose that, this would never work.  The great thing is that if you find lifestyle couples that have been together for a long time they will be the coolest, most down to earth, drama free people you have ever met.  Once again, it’s all about having fun and marriage should never be hard!  There are three things that end a marriage: parenting conflicts, money, and sex.  When you eliminate one of those problems from a relationship, you immediately have it 33% better than other couples!

LOLA – What do you write on your tax return as a profession for this income?

S.A. –  Model.

LOLA – Has it ever happened that you’re out with your girlfriends and you’re like, “Oh, sorry, I have to leave, I’m filming tonight”?

S.A. –  Nope, I never plan for things like that to overlap.  In general, on a film day it’s like game day for me.  I spend my morning getting ready and give 100% to filming.  If they did a great job, I should be exhausted by the end, so we don’t usually plan on doing anything after, although sometimes its shorter than planned so we will go out after on occasion.

LOLA – Do your girlfriends have questions about it?  Do they express interest?

Sara Anne with Grace Stewart

S.A. –  They did have a lot of questions and most of them have watched my films on their own and had even more questions after.  All of them have joked that they need to get into it!

LOLA – Would you ever invite one of them to join you?  Or have you ever?

S.A. –  We decided long ago that we will never mix vanilla friends and lifestyle again.  It has caused too many problems and we do our absolute best to stay drama free!

LOLA – Plans for your future career?

S.A. –  Keep having fun!  I plan to continue making films as much and often as possible until people stop watching.  And I’ll remain in the lifestyle until I get too old to do it.  Then I’ll probably just become a nudist.  LOL.

Sara Anne squeezing out that Cream Pie