Off the Record with ‘S’

A while ago, Lola conducted an interview with a hotwife, MILF, amateur porn-star named ‘S’ (you can probably figure out who she is). During the interview, S’s story took an interesting turn that was, then, off the record. Since then S has given up the porn production (because certain family members found out and pressured her and her husband to stop) and so now we bring you the part we had to leave out then, but we won’t be saying who exactly this is for, well, obvious reasons.

Artist’s rendering of the story

Lola to ‘S’: “Your son’s friends don’t know about your porn?”

‘S’ replied, “I didn’t say that.  Is this off the record?”

“If you want it to be.”

“Please.”

“OK.”

“Like I said, one of our friends found out about the homemade porn we were making and posting.  They thought it would be. . . I don’t know what. . . funny to tell our other friends.”

“That sucks.”

“Yeah.  So we had to tell our sons. They would find out from someone sooner or later and it was better to be from us than from one of their friends at school.”

“Of course.”

“So we told them.  The oldest didn’t want to know anything more.  He’s out of the house and was like, ‘Whatever Mom.’  But our younger son.  He had just started high school, so it could have been devastating for him.”

“Of course!”

“To our surprise, he had so many questions!”

“Like what?”

“Why?  Who?  How often?”

“Did you tell him?”

“Yes.  Of course.  We wanted to be honest.”

“How did he handle it?”
“He eventually accepted it – all of it.”

“That’s amazing!”

“Well, he’s pretty mature for his age.”

“I’d say.”

“But his friends eventually found out.”

“News of a mom making homemade porn spreads faster than news of a mom making homemade cookies, I guess.”

“Especially among young boys with raging hormones, just emerging out of a pandemic lockdown.”

“I can only imagine,” said Lo, dreamily.

“And they started jacking off to my films.”

“How’d you find out about that?”

“That’s an interesting story.”

“Do tell!”

“Well, one day his friends came over after school.”

“OK.”
“And they were playing video games and drinking soda and, you know, usual stuff.”

“Yeah.”

“But then I popped into the basement – that’s where they had the game console set up.”

“I can picture it.”

“I offered them some chips and other snacks or drinks, but they all just looked at me like I had three heads – or three tits!”

“That clued you in.”

“Yeah.”

“Then what?”

“I found out that after I had left the room, one of them said, ‘Can we turn off the game and watch your mom on Pornhub?’  My son was like, ‘No!  Absolutely not!’  But his friends overruled him and they turned it on.  The one who had asked to watch it knew exactly how to find it.  ‘That’s your mom?!’ the others asked.  They couldn’t believe it!”

“I bet.”

“They asked my son if I would come downstairs again.  He called me and I walked downstairs with more snacks for them.  They had turned the video game back on and pretended like they weren’t just watching porn of me.  I happened to be tanning outside when he called and so they saw my tattoos and knew right away that it was really me and not just a look-alike.  One of them was bold enough to say, ‘Mrs. P–, what’s it like to make those videos?’  I was taken aback and I said, ‘What are you talking about?’  He said, with a smirk, ‘You know.  We were just watching it.’  They turned it back on to show me.  It was a vid of me with two other men.”

“That’s mortifying!”

“Well, I had to accept it, right?”

“I guess.”

“It was my choice, after all.  Mine and my husband’s.”

“What happened next?”

“I said, ‘It’s just for fun,’ like I didn’t care what they did.  As if I was talking about gardening as a hobby or something.”

“And?”

“Well, they clamored, ‘Will you have fun with us?’”

“Bold!”

“Yes.  But they were at an age that they’d say anything that popped into their heads.”

“What did you say?”

“I thought I’d challenge them.  A game of chicken that I thought I’d win.  I said, ‘Pull down your pants and find out.’”

“Also bold!  What did they do?”

“To my shock and surprise, they did!  I was faced with five pubescent penises standing at attention as I stood in my skimpy bikini holding a bowl of chips!”

“What about your son?”
“He was there.  He watched.  He didn’t take down his pants.  His face blushed.”

“And?”

“I said, ‘You all jack off, right?’  They nodded.  I pulled my bikini bottom up tight so that my labia were flapping down over the taught string and said, ‘Well, tonight you can masturbate to the thought of this.’”

“That’s amazing!  Did they pull up their pants with a smile on their faces?”

“No.  The same boy who asked me about the porn, said, ‘I want you now!’”

“And?”

“Well, I can’t lie, I was intrigued to see how these kids could do.”

“No!”

“He started jacking off right there, in front of me and in front of his friends.”

“What did you do?”

“I watched.”

“Just watched?”

“Well, I’ll admit, I got wet.  I could feel my juices dripping down my inner thighs.”

“And?”

“He stared at my pussy lips as they enveloped the G-string and stroked so hard until he came.  He came so much and so powerfully and so far!!!!  It landed on my bare feet!”

“What happened next?”

“I said, ‘Feel better?’  He could hardly speak, but he nodded ‘Yes.’  I said, ‘Good.  Now the rest of you can go home and do the same, but this is our little secret, ok?’  No one said anything.  I added, ‘If you ever want something like this to happen again, you’ll agree, this is our little secret.  OK?’  They all agreed.”

“And what did you do?”

“I turned around slowly, so they could get a good glimpse of my ass, and went upstairs.  I went to my bedroom, got on the bed, pulled out my dildo, and went to town on my holes thinking about all those little eager cocks standing at attention for my pussy.  I thought about them all watching porn of me getting fucked and masturbating to me and I came so hard that I had to change all the bedding!”

“Did you tell your husband?”

“Not right away.”

To be continued…

“Normalize Cuckolding” Content Creator Roxy Interviewed by Lola Down

Questions for Roxy – the hotwife of Ben and Roxy who run the website “Normalize Cuckolding”:

Roxy Dover and Ben

Roxy, Ben, and Bull

L: How did each of you get into the lifestyle?

R:  We actually met while swinging. Ben had been in the lifestyle for like 10 years before we met. He started swinging right out of high school and has never had a monogamous relationship.  Me and my ex husband have always had threesomes and other group activities since high school.  After we kinda cheated on each other a bunch we decided to open things up a little more formally.  After a few weeks of hooking up with Ben we realized there was something going on between us and that we were in very bad marriages.  One thing led to another and we ended up getting divorced and we married each other. I know one of the rules of swinging is to not fall in love, so we call this our swinger fail.

Roxy Dover

L: When did you decide to launch “Normalize Cuckolding” and why?

R: A few years back we were joking around about me wanting to bring a boyfriend with us to various places and events and that we should “normalize cuckolding” so I could openly do that without any of the negative connotations that come with that. It was kinda a joke between Ben and me and then he used it in some of our promotional work.  People really took to it and it kinda took off.  After a while we decided to lean into it and do seminars, podcasts, and set up a whole site dedicated to it.

Roxy’s Puffy Pussy

In reality, “Normalize Cuckolding” is really about not kink shaming.  While we want to reduce the stigma of being a cuckold, because none of the stereotypes are close to being true in most situations, we also want people to be able to explore whatever they enjoy without the fear of what other people think or how they are going to react.  We have one trip through life; everyone should be able to enjoy it how they want.  As long as what you are doing isn’t hurting anyone, you should feel free to do what makes you happy.

Roxy’s Mons Pubis

Roxy Can’t Get Enough!

L: What has been the response to “Normalize Cuckolding”?

R: People love it.  There really hasn’t been any negative response and in fact it seems to have helped people.  We often get emails or DMs from people we have helped get into the lifestyle through our content. What was really cool was that at Exxxotica 2024 NJ, 2 young guys came over to our booth and we were talking and one of them started to say how cuckolds are just weak, little men who can’t satisfy their wives.  I then asked 6’7″ 400lbs Ben to come over to join the conversation.  Not only did that shut him down, but his friend actually schooled him on all of the positives of cuckolding and the reality of what most cucks are like. So, for the most part, it seems to help others understand the kink and is helping others understand it a bit better.

Roxy’s Brand

Roxy puts out the call

That Glaze!

L: Best cuck experience you’ve had so far?

R: We got an AirBnB and a hotel room. I took Ben to the hotel room and made him get naked and locked his PA piercing to a kettlebell so he couldn’t move or do anything.  I then went to the AirBnB and spent the night with a very well-hung bull.  It was the best sex of my life.  After fucking all night, I went and got Ben from the hotel room but sat on his face and made him clean my very full, very sore pussy first.  Then I brought him back to the AirBnB so he could make sure he thanked my bull before he left.  This was one of the hottest things we have done.

L: When did you bring Kallie Freya into the mix and what’s the story behind “Crimson Chaos”?

R: We were shooting at Exxxotica and Moses brought her to our room to shoot a threesome scene.  The chemistry between us was electric. It was clear there was a connection between us.  After that we became very close friends and started to work together.  Both of us being redheads, we decided on the name Crimson Chaos.  Currently our schedules and lives are kinda pulling us apart, but Kallie is one of the most authentic, friendly, caring people you could ever meet.

Kallie Freya and Roxy Dover

Kallie and Roxy on Vacation

Kallie and Roxy

Kallie and Roxy – Killer Curves

Kallie and Roxy share an intimate moment

Kallie and Roxy normalize cuckolding together

L: Favorite porn stars (amateur or professional)?

R: Every single person I have worked with has been amazing.  Either we are doing a great job vetting talent or most porn stars are awesome people, but the vast majority of the time I walk away from a shoot wanting to work with the person again.  Also, being in the industry you grow a deep respect for what other talent is going through.  This is a nonstop grind where you have to keep moving.  Being a porn star is not easy. When collaborating with others, they become your partner in this so it’s really hard to select just a few who are my favorites.  Now I do have a small list of people I will not work with, but I’m going to keep that to myself.

Kallie has some moves of her own.

L: Favorite films, books, or TV shows?

R: There is a pretty sweet collection of books called Match, Cinder & Spark; they are pretty good.  We don’t watch many movies, but for TV we are usually binge watching something from years ago.  We are currently watching “Everybody Loves Raymond,” just finished “Home Improvement.”  I always have “New Girl” on during the day when I’m home.  I like simple and funny things to watch; nothing that’s going to make me depressed or over tax my brain to think about…..comfort shows

L: How does your hotwife/cuck relationship compare with what you’ve read in the Match, Cinder & Spark books?

R: Every hotwife/cuck relationship is different. It seems in the book there is a loving primary relationship with a dominant partner who loves how slutty the other one is. Our relationship is kind of like that.  Real cuckold relationships are rooted in love. I hate when guys ask me to cuck them; it’s simply not possible. I don’t love them.  There is no way you can truly understand what it feels like to be a cuck or a hotwife if it’s not done in a loving relationship. I also like when Ben is dominant when we are together. I’m naturally submissive and some of the stuff I want to explore, like say knife play, can only be done with someone I trust.  The issue we run into is that Ben also prefers to be submissive and craves that loss of control. So, in our relationship when we are alone, Ben is more of a switch.

Kallie and Ben

L: What would your dream date with me entail?

R:  I’m Bi so I always enjoy a sexy lady like yourself.  I’m also a size queen, so I love big dick as well.  So, for me a dream date would be: we get a nice hotel room, enjoy each other for a bit, order a pizza, cause I love to see a curvy woman like you eat naked and be fucked, and then invite over a few well-hung studs to pound us the rest of the night. Maybe we kick them out when they are done and we can cuddle while eating some cake and watching TV as we fall asleep together.

L: What can we expect from you in the near future?

R: Just plugging away at the website and trying to further the normalize the cuckolding movement.  Also, we have gotten into VR porn over the last few years and I think I’m going to make a bigger push with that this upcoming year.

L: Thanks so much! This has been fun!

Come and Get It!

 

Interview with Safe Word author: Molly Weatherfield, a.k.a. Pam Rosenthal

If you missed Part I of our two-part interview with Pam Rosenthal, whose erotica pen name is Molly Weatherfield, then you will want to check out THIS POST.

Her award-winning first book, Carrie’s Story, was followed by an even more wild adventure – both in terms of plot, sex, and narrative style – Safe Word.

Here is Lola’s interview with Molly and also an amazing illustration done by our dear friend in Ukraine, Sergii.  The illustration shows Lola, lying down on the floor, reading Carrie’s Story, as Pam Rosenthal (top left) looks on at her fictional author, Molly Weatherfield (top right) and Molly’s fictional character, Carrie looks to her creator with admiration.

Pam, Molly, Carrie, Lola

Questions for Pam Rosenthal, a.k.a. Molly Weatherfield – PART TWO – Safe Word

Lola – I’m so glad you enjoyed the first interview and have agreed to a second for the sequel book, Safe Word! As I said at the end of our last interview, I totally needed a sequel because I didn’t want Carrie’s Story to end – especially not where it did end. But, I have to say, Safe Word did not follow any of the possible narrative sexcapades that I had imagined at the end of Carrie’s Story – and I imagined a lot!

This will be a tricky interview because I don’t want to give away too much of the book for anyone who hasn’t read it yet, but – OMG! – you really took off for the sequel! As in, Safe Word was off to the races!

Compared to Carrie’s Story, this book has a lot of steamy man-on-man sex and BDSM. Where did that come from and, again, were you worried about pushing boundaries or even warping genres?

Safe Word by Molly Weatherfield

Molly – Actually, I was so surprised to be writing it at all, that I never thought about whether I was taking things too far. I mean, I had told everybody that Carrie’s Story was a one-off, and that I was done. And then I found out that I wasn’t, which was such a gift, and so unexpected, that I just ran with it.

As for the man-on-man sex, I don’t remember it as being a conceptual departure from the first book. It’s just that in Safe Word there are more opportunities for variation. Carrie has moved on to a bigger world, with more possibilities, while Jonathan is kind of rediscovering that world. What wasn’t entirely explicit in Carrie’s Story (though Kate is kind of grumpy about it) is that for the year or two when he’s most involved with Carrie, Jonathan has stopped being active in the association and its doings. But with Carrie gone, his old life comes rushing in on him again. What I was going for was a sense that the magnitude and the variety of this hidden world of sexual exchange and domination should be always revealing more of itself to the reader, through Carrie’s and Jonathan’s narratives of the year they’ve spent apart. I used to call this the “Snoopy’s doghouse” approach, but clearly, it was a way to conceptualize my own fantasy life as I explored it. 

Lola – There were a couple of points in the novel where I laughed out loud because the plot went in such an unexpected direction. For instance, the rivalry between Carrie and Stephanie really reminded me of some of the YA books I had read. And then, while in the stable, Carrie befriends her neighbor by clandestinely using a piece of rubber tube to communicate between stalls. That reminded me of a scene from V for Vendetta, which came out much later than your book. And you mentioned to me before the interview that the first scene of the book is right from Little Women. Two more disparate books, I think, could not be found. Was this sort of juxtaposition of texts part of your plan or did it just come out that way and you realized it after?

Molly – I don’t know anything about V for Vendetta. But the Carrie and Stephanie rivalry is very YA, you’re right. And it was inspired by something that happened years ago among a bunch of adults, including me, who were traveling and working together. And because of the pressures of the situation, we found ourselves sometimes acting like bratty teenagers, even to the midnight giggling and whispering. Not proud of it, but there you are.

As for Little Women, thankfully it was only after I’d finished writing the first scene of Safe Word that I realized that I’d copped it from the scene in Little Women when Laurie first catches up with Amy in Europe. In the Greta Gerwig movie the scene is shown from the p.o.v. of Amy in the carriage with Aunt March. But in the novel, it’s very similar to the scene in Safe Word: first a kind of birds-eye view of the setting in the south of France, then focusing in on a very handsome American man who’s being rather ogled by passers-by while he waits for a particular young woman.

Here are some snippets of the passage from Little Women:

At three o’clock in the afternoon, all the fashionable world at Nice may be seen on the Promenade des Anglais, a charming place… Along this walk, on Christmas Day, a tall young man walked slowly, with his hands behind him, and a somewhat absent expression of countenance… which caused sundry pairs of feminine eyes to look approvingly after him… There were plenty of pretty faces to admire, but the young man took little notice of them, except to glance, now and then, at some blonde girl, or lady in blue.

And here are some parallel bits from Safe Word:

The city itself [Avignon] is heavily touristed… On this particular day… however, it was sunny and lively… An American man was sitting at one of the cafes… and he’d been glancing up eagerly whenever a slender young woman, especially one with close-cropped hair, came from that direction… Lots of attractive people were strolling… lots of women he liked looking at… and since he was extraordinarily good-looking… none of this was going unnoticed.

What was so remarkable to me when I finally realized what I’d done, was remembering how much I’d loved the scene in Little Women when I read it as a breathless 9-year-old, just knocked out by what I took to be its elegance and sophistication. The point of view and the rhythm of the phrasing had clearly imprinted itself onto me and yet my conscious mind didn’t remember it at all; when I was writing that part of Safe Word I was focused on the Avignon history (which are themselves copped from Francine du Plessis Gray’s At Home with the Marquis de Sade, the book I’d reviewed for Salon.com). 

But then, in both Carrie books — and really in everything I’ve ever written — I used so much of what I’d read and experienced, even when it might not appear directly apposite to the subject at hand, which I think is awesome evidence of the heavy lifting the mind and memory are capable of during the creative process. Once, at a reading, I was introduced by the author and anthologist Violet Blue, who said to me, jokingly, “I feel that I know you.” To which I replied, about 90% seriously, “You do.”

Lola – Whereas Carrie’s Story was, like many erotica books, a romance novel with kinks and explicit scenes, Safe Word is a much more complex work. I really appreciated the multilayer narrative. On one level you have Carrie, who is in love with life in general and is open-minded and willing to experience all of it. (I love that about her!) But there is always the lingering question in the background of the book (carried over from the first novel) of whether she will get together with her most obvious love interest, Jonathan. But Jonathan is engaged in his own love affair with Kate. And then, because none of these characters are simple, one dimensional, or merely functional for the plot, there is always the possibility that Kate and Carrie will fall in love. I had no idea how it would end, even right up to the last pages! How did this complex plot develop?

Molly – For maybe three quarters of the process, I didn’t know how it would end either. And I guess that I only found my ending when I’d realized that I’d come to the outer limit of my erotic imagination; the feeling that I couldn’t make things any heavier, deeper, or more hardcore and still continue having fun in fantasyland.

Kate’s my favorite character in some ways. I have no idea where I got the idea for her, but I’m always wanting to know (i.e. imagine, i.e. write) more parts of her backstory, to account for her toughness and honesty. I was also kind of obsessed with how Jonathan’s such a pampered little prince: I enjoyed imagining him, but I found myself resenting how much he gets away with; I remember explaining to author and sexual activist Carol Queen that I thought of him like my cat — so beautiful that somehow he existed to be spoiled and indulged. I found their story provocative, sexy, and a bit troubling — as Carrie does, even if she begins to wonder whether it’s her story any longer. 

Lola – And, while we’re on the topic of narrative complexity, the trading of stories between Carrie and Jonathan as they seduce each other and then seduce each other again was brilliant! Of course they would seduce each other with words. I can appreciate breaking with conventional narrative form. This book is so inventive, not just for erotica, but as a novel. Did you feel as if you were breaking new ground that way?

Molly – I’m not really satisfied with how it flows between Carrie’s narrative, Jonathan’s narrative, and the overriding omniscient storytelling, but it was the best I could do with what technical chops I had. So I guess the best answer is that I was breaking new ground for me, and maybe for a certain kind of erotica, but that I was and am haunted by knowing that there are narrative techniques that I didn’t (and don’t) know how to employ. Yhat isn’t at all to say that I’m sorry I wrote it. I did the best I could with what I wanted to say, and in many ways it’s my favorite of my books.

Lola – One aspect of the book I really enjoyed was that the “masters” or “owners” were not only rich men. And the “slaves” or “subs” weren’t just women. (Other than Carrie, we don’t really know their socio-economic status in the civilian world.) There is a certain sexual equality in the book, if not economic equality. I also took particular delight in Jonathan’s punishment for breaking the rules. That really put a dent in the sense that these rich folk were beyond being flogged themselves. And, it’s clear throughout that Kate is the dom to just about all the other characters. Did it just flow that way as you were writing it, or did you have a political statement in mind?

Molly – Again, the sexual equality was what I’d learned from Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty books. I didn’t have a political statement in mind, although I suppose these days you could look at it that way. At the time, though, I was just glad to be exploring the world I was imagining, and grateful to those who’d given me a world of increased possibility. 

Lola – “Feminism” means something different to just about each person who uses the word. I could picture some self-proclaimed feminists (especially Second Wave Feminists) getting their panties in a bunch about your erotica. But one aspect of Third Wave Feminism that I really embrace is the sex positivity – the notion that we all have our little kinks and there’s nothing wrong with living them out loud. So much sexual repression is a function of patriarchy and a healthy sexuality can look and feel all different ways for different people, including Male Dom/Female Sub relationships. Such relationships are not necessarily symptoms or results of patriarchy, or not simply so, at least. Did you receive a lot of criticism from other women/feminists for your writing?

Molly – No criticism at all from women or feminists. I know, it’s weird, right? But true nonetheless.

Lola – I’m sorry for my ignorance, but I wasn’t even born when this book was published. So, can you indulge me a little? The pony play. Where did that come from? If I do a Google search now for “bdsm pony girl race” I will get hundreds of images of women in various states of dress (leather, buckles, naked but for the harness, etc.) with bits in their mouths pulling little rickshaws with doms ready to whip them. I lack the historical knowledge to know if all this porn was inspired by your book (was it the first of this sort?), or if there was already a sub-culture of cosplay or other BDSM play that inspired you.

Molly – Pony play was around before I wrote Carrie’s Story, but I didn’t know about it. I only found out about it after I’d finished a short first draft and was looking for ways to extend it to novel length. Visiting a San Francisco leather/fetish store for inspiration, I found a glossy magazine containing an extensive photo shoot of some real-girls’ pony farm somewhere — or maybe it was all staged, I don’t know. Anyway, I leafed through it in kind of a fearful fever dream, jammed the magazine back onto the rack, stumbled out of the store, and drove home. Only to turn around, get back in the car, drive back, buy the magazine, read it over a few times, and write the Sir Harold chapter in a crazy burst of words that I’ve never been able to equal. It wasn’t writing, exactly: it was copying, as fast as my fingers would go, what my frenzied imagination was dreaming up as fast as it could. And then I retrofitted the earlier chapters around it.

Lola – Since our last interview, you mentioned that you wanted to post a link to the interview on your Facebook page, but were concerned that the censors might punish you for it. Along the lines of historical reference, can you talk about what sorts of shifts you’ve seen politically and artistically in tolerance and censorship with regard to erotica? There seems to be a growing movement in England and America to reduce access to certain material. I know we, with our blog, have been constantly challenged by censorship. I get my social media zapped on the regular and certain companies that transfer money refuse to send us funds because the money is made through sexually explicit material. What have you seen over the years?

Stroll?

Molly – First about censorship: Honestly, it’s been such a long time since I’ve written or actively promoted myself that I don’t have any specifics, but friends who are still writing are always dealing with it, and though I know stuff is always being challenged on Amazon, I’m sorry that I really don’t have any insights to share. I posted the link on my Molly Weatherfield page, which Facebook said it was going to take down. But they haven’t yet, so I’m totally confused. But I didn’t paste a link from my Pam Rosenthal page because I use it to connect to old friends and extended family, and I don’t want them to shut that down, so I’m more circumspect about erotic posts there.

As for shifts in standards, a few wildly unrelated points: 

  • I’m guessing that these days there’s a lot of really intense stuff out there, of a sensibility to appeal to readers of a different generation than mine. I’m told that my teenage granddaughters read stuff that’s crazy explicit (not my stuff, but who could blame them?). But I’m shy to pry too deeply, so I don’t know much. 
  • I’ve always objected to any pornography that tries to locate kinky sensibility in childhood trauma; it seems to me that when you do that you delegitimize freedom of choice and imagination by pretending to be on the side of the “victims” while at the same time scapegoating some nasty “victimizers” by blaming them for your own fantasy life. To the extent that Fifty Shades was coherent, it seems to me that it played that nasty trauma card while going all swoony over private jets and diamond bracelets — but since I found the book a dreary, disorganized read and wound up skipping long passages, who knows what she was getting at? 
  • What most troubles me right now is a kind of eroticizing of totally illegitimate power, as described in this powerful, smart, and scary essay: https://slowcivilwar.substack.com/p/thats-bait. If there’s anything I’ve tried to be clear and consistent about in these interviews it’s that I always situate my fantasies within a framework of total consensuality and freedom to say no. I really hate erotic fantasy that’s in any way based on coercion, and my imagination tends to shrivel up in horror when I don’t feel safe; which I don’t, these days — less as an erotic writer than as an ordinary American who cherishes democracy and the rule of law.

Lola – Lightning round of questions: Favorite erotica author? Favorite book (of any genre)? Favorite poet? Favorite movie? Favorite porn star? Favorite play of Shakespeare’s? Favorite sex toy? Favorite age (meaning, did you love your 20’s, 30’s, 80’s the most) and why?

Molly – Pauline Réage, who wrote Story of O, has got to be at the top of the list. Erotic authors I’ve admired over the years are Michelle Tea, Aaron Travis, Thomas Roche. I’ve mentioned Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty books, but I need to add that the direct inspiration for the association comes from the opening chapter of Rice’s book Exit to Eden. Actually, I’ve been reading more erotic poetry than fiction lately. Natalie Diaz’s book, Postcolonial Love Poem, has some really hot writing in it and won the 2021 Pulitzer Prize for Poetry; and you should run-not-walk to buy The Poetry of Sex, edited by Sophie Hannah.

I don’t have a favorite porn film, but the most smoking hot movie I’ve ever seen is Ang Lee’s Lust, Caution, starring the sexiest film actor I’ve ever seen, Tony Leung. 

All-time favorite pieces of writing: Grace Paley’s short story, “Friends”; The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (imo the great American novel); and Proust’s epic In Search of Lost Time, which is kind of my basic spiritual discipline.

Favorite play of Shakespeare? When I was young it was Much Ado About Nothing, clearly the first romcom. Now it’s absolutely King Lear, particularly in this version: https://www.ntathome.com/king-lear/videos/king-lear-trailer

No favorite sex toy, just some simple basics.  

As for sexual decades: it was pretty great when I was writing Carrie in my 40s, but as we approach 80, there’s a new kind of beauty to it, for which we are profoundly grateful.         

Lola – I don’t know if you have kids or grandkids, but, if you do, do you have any regrets about writing erotica since they will probably eventually be reading your work? Do you ever look back and think, “That was fun to write, but, OMG! I should have never published that!”?

Molly – Our very smart son, a literature professor, has managed to be entirely circumspect about my erotica for the last 30 or so years. I have no idea whether he’s read them or not, which is just fine by me. And I’m guessing that his two astonishingly literate daughters will be pretty much the same.

Still, I do sometimes have second thoughts about my books — again, because they’re still out there, in a world where cruelty has been instrumentalized and eroticized. So sometimes I have to pick up one or the other of them and reassure myself that that’s not what I was doing — far from.

Lola – Last question. Not sure if you have had a chance to read or listen to any of HH’s writings about me/us, but if you have, any thoughts?

Molly – Only a few sentences, so I can’t comment. But I love the idea of you guys sharing an erotic and a creative life as a single enterprise. Way to go and wishing you all the best.

Lola – Thank you so much! This has been a rare treat!!!

Molly – Thanks to you as well. I’ve been kind of grieving the fact that I’m not writing any more. But your smart, engaging questions have helped me sum things up and to own the astonishing experience of writing these books.

Interview: Breastfeeding and Lactation with Grey Desire

Grey Desire – NOT how she feeds her baby.

If you don’t know about Grey Desire – the sexiest yoga instructor on the internet – then go back and read Lola’s interview with her from a few weeks ago.

Early Nude Yoga Instructional Video of Grey Desire

She just had her second child and has been posting all sorts of sexy stuff about lactating and breastfeeding. She agreed to talk to Lola about it!

Preggo Yoga with Grey Desire

Lola – First of all, congratulations on the birth of your second child! I’m so glad all went well and both baby and mommy are healthy! Also, thanks for agreeing to do an interview on lactation and breastfeeding. As a hotwife without kids, but with a lot of curiosity, this is something I’m very interested in and after seeing your posts, it seems like you’re into it too! A lot of my friends have been having babies, so breastfeeding has just become part of my social life experience. As you know, I’ve been a fan of yours since the early days of your homemade naked yoga videos. I’m amazed at the posts you make of yoga while really, really pregnant. How has yoga and your life-style helped you with pregnancy, delivery, and now with breastfeeding?

Nude yoga is all about stretching

G.D. – Thank you so much, I am so grateful for how smoothly everything went! I honestly credit a lot of that to my regular yoga practice. Keeping the body moving and strengthening key areas are so crucial to keeping up with the physical changes of pregnancy and preparing for the intense workout that is giving birth. I also worked perineal stretching into my yoga flows which is likely why I only pushed for four minutes during this delivery & had no tearing! My postpartum recovery has also been amazing and quick, I was back to feeling like my normal self and doing gentle exercises two weeks postpartum! All thanks to my regular yoga practice throughout this pregnancy!

Keeping the perineum limber

Deep downward dog

The key to yoga is to keep hydrated

Lola – Tell me about your thought process with regard to posting (and posting a lot) during pregnancy and now during your lactation. I mean, you post pee vids, squirt vids, and now vids and photos of your breasts leaking, squirting, and dripping. Not every sex-positive content creator would do that. What made you decide to go ahead and post during these times? Is it body-positivity? The money that can be made from these otherwise taboo and kinky aspects of women’s bodies? Or something else?

Grey Desire, self-proclaimed “Hucow”

The milk bar

G.D. – I think my thought process is just that I am a horny kinkster at heart 😉 All of these types of things turn me on and are my personal kinks so why not share them with the world?!

From a Grey Desire Queef video

Lola – This is your second child, right? Does the first want to get in on the meal-train when the boobs come out to feed the newborn? There’s a lot of debate out there about the proper time to stop breastfeeding. A lot of women – and it’s mostly women for some reason – shame other women when they breastfeed past a certain point. What’s your take on it?

Breastfeeding in the news

G.D. – The breastfeeding world is filled with so much shame and way too many opinions! I produced milk for a full year with my first and intend to do the same this time. Breast milk for the first year of life is the most widely recommended approach so that was my goal. Then I found that the toll creating milk took on my body was way too heavy to continue past that point, otherwise I likely would have.

Strong Opinions on breastfeeding

Lola – Just like there’s a lot of debate about the cutoff point for breastfeeding, there’s also a heated public debate about where and how it’s appropriate to breastfeed in public. Should you cover up? Should you not do it at all? People seem to be made uncomfortable by it and, instead of owning their feelings, they shame moms. What’s your take on it?

Posting from an influencer

G.D. – I am certainly not one to want to censor boobs for any reason, especially not my own 😉 Breastfeeding in public should be totally accepted, if not enabled, within society in my opinion!

Public breastfeeding

Lola – I imagine that because everyone nowadays feels entitled to voice their opinion and hoist their own beliefs on others (with regard to how long to breastfeed and where and how to do it), there are probably a lot of people out there eager to tell you, Grey Desire, about what you should and shouldn’t do with regard to selling “porn” content having to do with breastfeeding. What has been the response that you’ve received?

Grey Desire prior to breastfeeding (round 2)

G.D. – The vast majority of responses have been positive. People love bodily fluids and are quite fascinated by breast-milk. It’s not something you encounter often in day-to-day life or in porn so I am frequently met with lots of questions that I am happy to answer. There are of course the occasional trolls who feel the need to tell me I’m a terrible mom for wasting the milk… little do they know breast-milk is a supply and demand cycle. The more my porn demands, the more supply I have. So creating porn with my milk actually produces more milk 😉

Supply and Demand – Grey Desire

Lola – How is your husband (a.k.a. “Stunt Cock”) handling all of this? – The two kids, your career, you posting this content, and also your enormous, lactating breasts? Does he get to have a snack now-and-then?

Some of Grey Desire’s favorite bits.

G.D. – He handles everything like a champ! He has been a great support system and help throughout this adjustment phase. He is also the absolute best at hyping me up when I’m unsure about the changes to my body. However, he is not a boob guy, ass man through and through! So typically he doesn’t give a second thought to my boobs, no matter the size but for some reason, this engorgement phase has at least partially transformed him into a boob guy 😉

Preggo Grey Desire being shaved by “Stunt Cock”

Lola – You’re probably aware that there are a lot of women out there who make content of themselves breastfeeding their babies. Somehow it doesn’t get blocked by the censors on the social media sites, maybe because those sites don’t want to be seen as lactation shaming. But they clearly are making it as sexual content – they dress in suggestive lingerie, wear alluring make-up, etc. What do you think of women including their babies in these sorts of posts?

Just one example of a woman posting her breastfeeding journey on line

G.D. – I put a lot of effort into separating my family from my work. As such, I am a firm believer that as an adult content creator, you should not be posting your children on your social media sites in any capacity. Certainly not sexualizing any act they are doing.

Woman who shares an intimate moment.

Lola – I’ve been told that for many women an orgasm can be an unintended, yet not unwanted, consequence of breastfeeding. Has this ever happened to you?

Breastfeeding orgasm?

G.D. – I have heard of that happening too! It has never happened to me though. Even in a sexual setting, I don’t receive much erotic pleasure from nipple stimulation. So I certainly don’t receive it when I am not in a sexual headspace.

Lola – Do you have any favorite preggo or breastfeeding content creators? If so, who?

Emma Sinclaire capturing the magic

G.D. – I honestly don’t know, they finish pregnancy/lactating too quickly, so we can skip this one!

Emma Sinclaire exuberantly squirts

Emma Sinclaire grabbing a little snack

Lola – Generally, after giving birth, a woman is advised not to have sex for about six weeks, right? So, does your hubby (“Stunt Cock”) jackoff to your photos and vids? Or do you service him in other ways? Ever catch him getting off to anything else? Every couple has some sort of rules about that, I think. What’s yours?

“Stunt Cock” giving a little massage to Grey Desire

G.D. – After both of my pregnancies, we have had a lot of fun during this “sexless” phase! While my holes, and our favorite places, are off limits, it lets us get more creative about other ways to be sexual or simply just intimate together. This time we have been enjoying some creative sexting sessions and taking cumshots on any body part imaginable 😉 It’s also fun for me to read Match, Cinder & Spark aloud while I jerk him off.

Some solo fun with Grey Desire

Lola – Thanks so much for this interview! You’re always such a good sport! And good luck with awards season. Please tell us how all your fans can vote for you!

Don’t forget to vote for Grey Desire!

G.D. – Thank you for some fun, hot-topic questions! & thank you very much for the luck, we shall see! I am currently nominated for MILF Streamer of the Year in the XMA Creator Awards! If you’d like to vote, you can vote unlimited times a day, every day until May 20th at greydesire.com/vote

Molly Weatherfield, author of Carrie’s Story and Safe Word, a.k.a. Pam Rosenthal Interview

Dear fans of erotica and romance, today we have a very special interview for you:

Pam Rosenthal, a.k.a. Molly Weatherfield – PART ONE – Carrie’s Story

 Pam/Molly is an award winning author in both the genres of romance and erotica! That  doesn’t happen to just anybody! I had just finished reading her first published erotica novel, Carrie’s Story, and I felt such a kinship with both the titular character and the author. I looked her up, reached out, and – to my great luck – she was willing to chat! Then she was willing to do an interview. Now, if you haven’t heard of her (and, I admit, I had only heard of her in passing about a year ago), you totally should have! Why? Because her writing – style, plot, characters, and basic command of the English language – put that other ho-hum popularizer of erotica/BDSM fiction to shame! That’s right, 50 Shades should have been called “50 Degrees Not-As-Good-As Molly Weatherfield!” Or maybe, “16 Years Late!” No, really! Anything that pale best seller had to offer was there in Carrie’s Story, and more – whoa so much more! Don’t take my word for it. Read both for yourselves and get back to me.

Luckily, some have seen the quality in Molly/Pam. In October of 2006, Playboy called Carrie’s Story one of the top 25 sexiest novels ever written! Number 12, in fact – just after Lolita (which, in HH’s humble opinion is the best erotica ever written) and just before Erica Jong’s Fear of Flying. Not too shabby!

Playboy’s 25 Sexiest Novels Ever Written

Number 12 – Top 50 Percentile

That’s not the only list she’s made. There’s also “33 of the Best Erotic Novels of All Time.” Now, if you read that list, you’ll see that it is hardly “of all time.” I mean, there’s nothing prior to Lady Chatterley’s Lover from 1929 on the list. But hey, “33 of the Best Relatively Recent Erotic Novels” just doesn’t have the same pizazz.

Speaking of lists, one particular author I know (in a Biblical way) made the list of ranker.com‘s “Best Sensual Fiction Writers” (even though HH isn’t writing “fiction”). We’d both appreciate it if you’d take a moment to vote us up on the list. Thanks!

Classic and Updated

Now, let’s get to the interview!

Carrie’s Story (updated cover)

Lola – OMG! It is such an honor to interview you! However, I have to be honest, so far I have only read your BDSM erotic novel, Carrie’s Story.  That’s why this interview is PART ONE.  I look forward to reading Safe Word and then having a second interview. And, maybe, when I can, reading some of your Romance work, like A House East of Regent Street, which you published under your own name, Pam Rosenthal. But tell me, what’s your background?  How did you get into writing?

Molly – I’ve always thought of myself as a lifelong English major, in love with reading and writing, and a little shaky in terms of earnings potential. For most of my life I managed to pay the bills as a computer programmer, which was hard, though also stimulating, pretending to have technical chops. Before Carrie, I never considered writing fiction; what writing I did was lit-crit or wonky nonfiction stuff, often about computers and science fiction, published in obscure leftwing venues, but pretty exciting to me intellectually and even artistically (I got the name Molly, for example, from the mirror-shades girl in the classic cyberpunk novel Neuromancer).

I’ve also been a feminist since I came to adulthood in the late 60s (I’m pretty old, as anybody who did the math can figure out). And I also had a secret passion for SM erotica, at least since high school when I somehow glommed onto the Marquis de Sade. Which two parts of my belief system weren’t easy to reconcile, especially since 60s-70s second-wave feminism was particularly disapproving of anything smacking of sexual “objectification.” 

But it was my great good fortune to be in the right place at the right time to begin to resolve my dilemmas. I don’t know if your readers will know this history, but in the early 1980s there was a big split among feminists called “the sex wars,” where some devastatingly brilliant women began to challenge feminist orthodoxy, and to insist that their erotic and affective lives, their role-playing, style of dress, (even their lipstick) didn’t invalidate their personal power. This might sound quaint to you, but for me it was huge when feminists started theorizing about sexuality, writing erotica, plumbing the boundaries of autonomy and desire. There was a lot of backlash; a friend, the late Amber Hollibaugh, was thrown off a panel at Barnard College for talking about butch/femme lesbian roles. But I was inspired, and had the good luck to meet legends like Susie Bright and many others, and to read great, smart erotic stuff — fiction and non-fiction both, which probably got my writing instincts going, though I didn’t know it yet.  

Lola – Carrie’s Story is. . . how should I say?  It pushes so many limits.  How did you hit on this story?  Did the character of Carrie come to you first or did the deep, dark adventures just unfold as you went along?  What was the creative process?

Molly – I remember the first time I tried to write an SM story. It was a lazy, sunny Sunday after sex, and I was feeling really good and loosey-goosey, which I guess freed up my thoughts in some way. So, when my mind drifted to SM fantasies — and then to the fears of fascism that sometimes also flowed in along with the sexual stuff — I felt a little braver than usual, a little less guilty and a little more adventurous. Maybe sex-positive feminist thinking had actually started to penetrate; in any case, I began to wonder whether I was really the sicko I feared I was. What would happen, I wondered, if I actually let the fantasies rip? What would they look like if I wrote them down (what a concept)? So I sat down to find out.

For hours. There I sat in my ratty pink terrycloth bathrobe, scribbling and smiling and just… happy. I totally didn’t know what I was doing — I even had to run to the bookshelf to see how to punctuate dialogue. And when I wrote COMMA CLOSE QUOTE HE SAID PERIOD, I felt like God.

The story stank, though it did have a character sort of like Jonathan and a few characters who found their way into Safe Word. But it was such fun, and I felt so much myself, that I was determined to keep writing, and maybe even trust my own moral sense. Because I found that in my fantasies, I was totally turned on — obsessed really — by the idea of mutual consent, and the subtle, interesting places that can take the imagination and the relationship. I’m interested in people playing power games, exploring strange places, but from a position of mutual agreement as to the boundaries of the fantasy space. I am absolutely not interested in sex where deep down (in like reality, like in government or the economy, or like on Jeffrey Epstein’s private island) the power is unequal. 

What was missing, of course, was Carrie. The smart-girl voice who’d been in my head since Jo March, and in western fiction since Elizabeth Bennet and Jane Eyre. The brave girl who fights the power with words and wit, and who can own the experience through her smarts. I realized I needed her to tell the story I was evidently dreaming up when I “heard” that voice in a fantasy novel called Beauty, by Sheri S. Tepper.

Anyhow, once I realized that Carrie would be telling the story, and that it was a story — that is, that she feels a need to tell us how she got to where she is when she’s telling it (which we don’t know yet, except for the auction, but which suggests a lot of SM tropes), I felt like I was cleared to go. That compulsion to tell how you got where you are is a powerful narrative engine, and I began to see how you could apply this to BDSM, with its tropes of training and discipline. Even if I didn’t know the ending, I felt that it would emerge in the telling. And oddly, the first publisher, Masquerade Books, caught the mood perfectly with the cover of the first edition: something about those wide light eyes, those parted lips (other Masquerade editions went way downhill from there).

Carrie’s Story – Original Masquerade Publishing Cover

Carrie’s Story, Most Recent (and Tame) Cover

Lola – You published this in ʼ94, so you must have been writing it earlier than that. Just to be clear – that was well before 50 Shades of Grey and its imitators took BDSM into the mainstream. Were you scared by what you had written? Did you think you’d ever find a publisher for it, or an audience? What was it like to be writing this stuff at that time?

Molly – I probably started writing it in ʼ91 or so. I was in no hurry, because it felt like its own reward to be exploring my fantasy life, opening up my imagination and sharing it with my husband, who began to share his as well. I don’t usually think of myself as brave, but I did while I was writing, and that felt amazing. And yeah, sure I was scared. “Always scared,” as Carrie says at some point. Because isn’t that what bravery is, to be willing to go where it’s scary? Isn’t that how we always get where we’re going, to find our limits as we go?

Still, I wasn’t writing in a vacuum. I was breathing the air of the San Francisco sex-positive feminist community, standing on the shoulders of giants, if you will. I was playing catch-up, reading lots of erotic fiction and theory, and adding a lot of stuff from my own reading over the years. And of course, since Carrie’s a brilliant, prodigy student intellectual, it all kind of fit together for me. 

As to whether I’d find a publisher: at first I really had no idea whether the thing was publishable. I thought the writing was good; I have a fair amount of confidence in my voice. But I didn’t know if my particular take on how body and mind work together would resonate with anybody else — and of course there’s always the fear of revealing oneself and grossing people out. “It’s a pure act,” I kept telling myself. “It’s its own reward.” And — certainly compared to Fifty Shades of Grey — the Carrie books are clearly a niche taste. But as the years go by, and as still, after 30 years, every so often I open my email to read some absolutely amazing, deeply thought communication from one or another reader, the thrill of making connection never gets old.

Carrie’s Story as I imagine it

Lola – The book, and its smart, sensual, and masochistic titular main character make frequent reference to erotica classics, most notably, Story of O by Pauline Réage.  What were the books that influenced you the most in writing this one and why?

Adaptation of Story of O

Molly – I’ve already mentioned the Marquis de Sade, who was in many ways a dreadful person, but I read bits and pieces when I was a teenager, and it stayed with me. A couple of years after that I read Susan Sontag’s essay, “The Pornographic Imagination,” and she talked about how porn is often funny, which gave me permission, years later, to make Carrie funny. Anyway, Sade is funny, in a weird, cold, whacked-out way (for more on this, for anybody who’s curious, you can read the piece I wrote for Salon.com, which is still kicking around the internet at https://www.salon.com/1998/11/19/feature_459/).

Histoire d Lo

Then, of course, Story of O, which came out in English in 1966, the same summer as Bob Dylan’s record Blonde on Blonde, which was the summer I connected with the guy I’ve been married to for more than 50 years now. We passed his copy of Story of O back and forth in bed. (And many years later I wrote about it, also for Salon, https://www.salon.com/1998/08/06/feature_12/)

Blonde on Blonde?

The next, important books came years later: Gayle Rubin, the brilliant queer theorist and cultural anthropologist, recommended Anne Rice’s Sleeping Beauty books, and I ran-not-walked to get hold of them. I think I’d find them unreadable now (all that spanking!), but at the time, I just gobbled them up, because I loved the equal-opportunity sexuality (women as tops and bottoms; gay and straight combinations cheerfully intermingling). And I loved the Disneyland fairy-tale setting. It was so light-hearted, so technicolor: I was totally energized by the idea of this sexual magic kingdom. 

Sleeping Beauty

There were also small-press books written by local (often queer) authors, that were super hot. Pat (now Patrick) Califia, Aaron Travis, Carol Queen, Thomas Roche, and Simon Sheppard are names that spring to mind, but there were lots more: San Francisco in the 80s and 90s was bursting with creative erotic imagination; I met Tristan Taormino at an open mic, for example. And this week I went to a Zoom memorial for the recently-deceased Dorothy Freed, a stalwart at erotic writers groups, whose memoir of her longtime, loving marriage to her BDSM partner, Life After Promiscuity, I totally recommend (I copy-edited it).

Perfect Strangers by Dorothy Freed

Lola – Though the story-line is fanciful, many of the scenes are ones that could have a basis in reality.  Were any of the sexy scenarios drawn from your real-life experience?

Molly – No. Sorry. My real-life experience is much more about subtle signals and shared imaginings. A funny thing, though, is that some people I used to work with as a programmer are sure they know who I took as my model for Carrie — and they won’t tell me who!

Porn inspired by Carrie’s Story

Lola – Did you dare show the novel to any of your friends, lovers, or family when it was still in manuscript form?  If so, how did they react?  And how did they react when it got published?

Molly – I’ve always been ridiculously, naively open about this stuff. There were some people who totally didn’t get it, but in general I received remarkably little pushback, and incredible help from friends who agreed to be beta readers, including the guy who corrected a quote from the Latin somewhere. My husband, in particular, is a tough, brilliant editor who pulls no punches and always helps me improve whatever I write. I even came out to my mother about it (a long story how that happened), though I strenuously warned her not to read the stuff. But when a piece of Safe Word got into some iteration of Best American Erotica, of course she read it anyway – the word “best” just being too much for her. “What did you think?” I asked her somewhat grimly. “It was Very. Well. Written,” she replied, through a jaw that might have been wired shut. And that was that.

Lola in her collar

Lola – Before this interview, you told me that the story never got optioned by any film companies.  It’s so cinematographic.  I could totally picture everything in my mind.  I am surprised no one offered that to you, especially after the box-office killing that the ho-hum 50 Shades pulled in. Any ideas why not?

Carrie’s Story definitely inspired many movies

Molly – I’m so flattered you think that, and I do think that one of the things I do well is move characters through imagined space. But as for actually making a movie out of it… maybe it’s better that nobody has. Carrie goes through a lot of stuff that would be far less engaging if you had to look at it rather than imagine it as told through her smart-ass commentary. Or as a leatherman friend once said to me, “Pam, pain hurts!”

Pain Hurts, but degradation?

Lola –  I’m sorry for the comparison and any spoilers, but, it seems to me the whole boring premise of 50 Shades is “Will she or won’t she?” sign the contract, that is. In Carrie’s Story, there is a contract, but the joke is that it’s all just cosplay, though the pain, degradation, abasement, and humiliation are real. However, Carrie can say no at any time. As I read it, I found it interesting to wonder, “How far will she go?” And it seemed to me like this was Carrie’s question too: “How far will I go?” And she goes pretty damn far! How did the plot drive the novel for you?

Molly – I think you’ve intuited what I’m going to answer. That the energy that makes the plot go was my energy, my curiosity about how far my fantasy life would go. You can’t fake that energy — or at least can’t.

Lola – I was so glad to learn that there was a sequel because, if I have any criticism of the book, it’s that it ended prematurely.  I wanted it to go on – so badly!  Just like I want this interview to go on.  I guess I have to get reading.  But, quick question, the audio book, narrated by Shana Savage, is just fantastic! Were you involved in choosing her for that format?

The only way to fly is listening to erotica

Molly – I was involved, and it is fantastic. Susie Bright, who produced the audio, let me choose between 3 finalists, and I chose Shana. And I’m so proud that in 2014 the audio book won an Audie award for best erotica — first time they gave an award for erotica.

Eargasms

Lola – Thanks again! We will continue this soon, I hope!!!!

Molly – Thank you, and hope to speak again.

Pam Rosenthal/Molly Weatherfield

 

 

Golden Girls – Queen Bev

Queen Bev enjoys Match, Cinder & Spark!

Our second Golden Girl and latest member of The Match Book Club, is Queen Bev – “The Super FUPA” (Fat Upper Pussy Area)! She LOVES to post sexy photos of herself and only came to this later in life. No matter! She’s sexy as hell! Here’s Lola’s interview with her. (If you missed our first “Golden Girl” – Candi Annie – you can check her out HERE.)

Queen Bev reads Match, Cinder & Spark

Queen Bev touching her FUPA

All hail the Queen!

Queen Bev Spreads

LOLA: When did you start posing nude and why?

QB: Two years ago now, so 2023, to help boost my confidence.

Bev in Fishnets

Queen Bev FUPA from behind

Queen Bev Supa FUPA

LOLA: I see you actually met up with a few people that look like you originally met them on-line. How did that happen and how’d you like it?

Queen Bev with fan Jamie Reed

Jamie Reed fills the FUPA of Queen Bev

QB: I met up with two different guys from social media. The first guy I met two different times last year. It was amazing. We had a great connection. Too bad he was married. We still talk a little bit. We would do it again, but he is a little ways away and it cost money for me to get there. The second guy is an hour away from me and he has come to see me twice and I went to see him twice. He has a girlfriend and supposedly they’re not good together, but who knows? You never know what guys are telling the truth or not, but he’s really good and he’s actually coming over this weekend.

Actual Bev ad

LOLA: Oooh, nice! So, did posting nudes of yourself increase your confidence?

Queen Bev all-over golden tan

QB: Truthfully, yes and no. Yes because you see the comments and the emojis from the guys. But for me, I had had a bad ex-husband he made me feel not good enough. So I constantly compare myself to the other women. It doesn’t matter if they’re thinner or bigger. If they’re thinner and they have bigger boobs, or have smaller boobs, but they’re bigger, then I feel they’re better or more beautiful. It’s worse when I post my pictures, but I love taking pictures of myself and I like showing, but then I have all these feelings that I’m not good enough.

Queen Bev made this on a bad self-confidence day

What do you think of Queen Bev?

LOLA: Do any of your friends or family know about your sexy posts?

QB: No. (Long pause.) Wait a minute! My cousin found pictures of me on a different app that somebody posted without my permission, so he knows. That was a little embarrassing but he said I look good. I’m like, OK whatever.

Queen Bev having some fun

LOLA: What are your kinks?

QB: I don’t know if you call it a kink or not, but I like watching the guys jack off. Sometimes they’re jacking off to me, sometimes just jacking off.  I like seeing it.

Queen Bev in a thong. Jack anyone?

Queen Bev celebrates the luck of the Irish

Doesn’t Queen Bev look like fun?

Queen Bev can’t keep her clothes on long though

LOLA: Your pics and vids show you peeing and masturbating. Do you like doing that for others, for strangers?

QB: I do it for the guys. I’d rather do it in person, but this is the next best thing.

Queen Bev Water Sports

Queen Bev keeps the FUPA slick

LOLA: How did you like Match, Cinder & Spark?

QB: It was awesome! It inspired me to take some photos in short-shorts.

Queen Bev in her short-shorts

LOLA: Thanks Queen Bev! This has been fun!!!

Queen Bev getting off to Lo

Queen Bev Back

Queen Bev Front

Queen Bev Back Again

Queen Bev’s beauty runs in the family.

Stunning!

The Golden Girls – Candi Annie

Cute Candi Annie

We’re starting a new category for this blog – “The Golden Girls” – that will feature sexy mature women (and their men).  This week we’re going to begin with a woman who has been in the lifestyle before it was called that.  Candi Annie was introduced to poly relationships real early and she hasn’t let up.  She’s in her sixties now and still going strong. If you like what you read and see, leave her a sweet comment.

Here’s the interview:

LOLA – Tell us about yourself. Where’d you grow up? Where’d you go to school? What did you do for most of your life? And how did you get into taking sexy photos and making sexy films?

Candi Annie in red

C.A. – I grew up in a small town in upstate New York and went to college in Boston- to a long gone, all girls college- Bay State Junior College. Getting away from all the limitations of a small town was an eye opener for me especially when it came to sex. I wanted to do it all and let all inhibitions go away. I tried everything I could think of sexually. A married couple that I actually “dated” at the time opened me up to not only the lifestyle having sex with other women which was great and sex on-camera. They actually arranged my first venture into hardcore porn for my eighteenth birthday where they bought me a ticket to LA to be in a “professional” porn shoot. It was so exciting and fun! My life took a turn after college and I had one bad relationship after another and my sexuality was put on the back burner for a number of reasons.

Unfortunately, the “professional porn shoot” pics are lost, but Candi Annie has tried to make up for it in later life.

Candi Annie with AARP volunteers.

Candi Annie getting off

LOLA – Where did you meet your husband and how did you two grow into the lifestyle you lead now?

C.A. – I met Al on the island of St. Croix where he was living and I was getting away from a cold New York winter and another bad relationship. We hit it off immediately! We talked for hours just walking around under the warm tropical night it was so amazing to find someone that I could tell everything to and he did not judge me. That openness is what solidified our relationship from the beginning. He never thought of me as a slut or anything like that, neither of us were virgins, what BS! He was excited to know of my previous experiences and was always wanting to know what made me feel good. The first time he went down on me it was electric, my most amazing orgasm in years! The sex just kept getting better and we were like 20 yr olds having sex 4-5 times a day. We never really thought of the lifestyle since our sex lives were already great, we just didn’t need it. But early on erotic photos did add some excitement and kept that “spark” alive.

Candi Annie with a friend at home.

Candi Annie likes to dress up to go out.

Candi Annie hitting on the staff.

LOLA – I can’t believe you’re sixty! You look great! Any special hints for preserving that beauty – both in terms of your face and also your great body?

C.A. – I am getting older and I certainly see the wrinkles more and more but I have always believed in good fast paced walks 3-4 times a week, nothing crazy and frankly speaking we still have sex every day- usually wake up sex that is usually all oral. I wake up to Al licking my pussy and after I reach my orgasm, Al brings his cock to my mouth and I “milk” him. Maybe that has something to do with all over health too, a big mouthful of cum everyday! I have to admit I crave the taste!

Candi Annie says, “A load of cum in the morning keeps me looking young!”

Candi Annie, “Next!”

Candi Annie is an inspiration to Lola Down

LOLA – I’ve noticed that most of your posts are with men and mostly older men. What are you into – men, women? Would you enjoy being with a younger man or woman?

C.A. – Older men just seem to be more caring and sensual. Ever since I visited those adult theaters in College where older men surrounded me and fondled me in such an erotic and respectful manner that I never felt uncomfortable. I would enjoy one after another but they were never forceful or disrespectful. They wanted to see me enjoying myself as much as they wanted to get off! That theater is where I met the male half of that couple I mentioned earlier. They took me under their wings and introduced me to so many exciting sexual things. Age did become an issue as we went along since I was actually only 16 when I met them but we had a great couple years and all involved had a great time. I have absolutely zero regrets!

Candi Annie camping

Candi Annie greeting the neighbors at the campground

Candi Annie has been around since before women shaved the bush

LOLA – What are your kinks, fetishes, and taboo interests?

C.A. – I think I have done them all! At this point meeting fun, interesting couples to explore with is all that is left on the bucket list. To have other couples that are well traveled open, loving but are sensual, compassionate, respectful and more on the professional and quiet side is our primary interest now. We are beyond the wild loud parties and really tired of rude, crude and pushy guys.

Candi Annie working from home

Candi Annie ready for her next Zoom meeting

Candi Annie prepping for that big presentation.

Candi Annie waiting for your call

LOLA – How long have you done this – the sex posting – and how long do you hope to keep it up?

C.A. – We started posting erotic photos about twenty years ago and without doubt it has kept the spark in our relationship! Truthfully I think this may be my last year unless perhaps the financial side improves, our sex life is great and I think the couples – swingers resorts and cruises etc will be our focus moving beyond this year. Not everything has to be on camera.

Candi Annie camping again.

Keep going Candi Annie!

LOLA – Top bucket-list sex fantasy?

C.A. – Tops is to find those elusive perfect couples to explore with! They should both be Bi, as well as the previously mentioned prerequisites. Age is irrelevant as long as everything else comes together, but it will take a “mature” couple to hit it off with us- that is an attitude not an age.

Candi Annie looking great!

LOLA – Books, movies, TV shows, and other porn stars you like?

C.A. – As far as pornstars- Nina Hartley is my long time crush and with her age she just gets more impressive. I am somewhat of a John Grisham fan and read most his books . Love erotic tales as well and of course Match, Cinder & Spark books! For TV shows I love comedy!!

Nina Hartley back in the day

Nina Hartley looking hot!

Nina Hartley timeless!

LOLA – What’s your relationship with your fans?

C.A. – I have some amazing on-line lovers! It is such a turn on for me to know the men masturbate as they watch me and cum as they think of me. If that is not some kind of LOVE I don’t know what is! My biggest thrill is to receive video tributes that show them masturbating as they watch my video and end with a huge flow of cum going all over the screen! As far as meeting in person, I am very careful and let Al deal with that. I like the fantasy that I share with my lovers on-line and living up to that in person does not always work out. They have thoughts of what I am like and I love to share and let their fantasy continue but meeting the real me can let them down and that frankly terrifies me. It happened once many years ago where we met a couple in Newport, RI where we were living at the time they wanted to get together with the point to see about moving forward with an intimate relationship. The female in that couple backed out saying I was too old and not what she expected. I was devastated and that put our swinging hopes on hold for years. I now hope to just be at a resort or on a cruise where we just happen to met the right couple that we hit it off with! As for single men – it is even more difficult – rude and crude scare me! – in person anyway… on-line it is fine!

Show us some love! Send your cumtributes for Candi Annie and Lola Down to me: downloladown@gmail.com

LOLA – What’s next for you?

C.A. – More of those cruises and hope that destiny will show us the swinger way!

LOLA – Where can we see more of you?

C.A. – My main content site is: https://candiannie.com
it is forwarded to sheer currently: https://www.sheer.com/Candi-Annie
most free content: https://www.xvideos.com/candi_annie_official
latest videos and custom work: https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/437396/candi-annie/Store/Videos
always some here: https://xhamster.com/users/newbiecpl4u
others would be newbienudes and adultism plus…

social sites:
Twitter “X” – https://x.com/anniecandi73578?lang=en
Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/candiannie.bsky.social
Reddit: https://www.reddit.com/user/newbiecpl4u/?rdt=48390
MeWe: https://mewe.com/candiannie.27/posts
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61557639365527
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/candi_annie69/

If you want Candi Annie to keep doing what she’s doing into her 70’s, support her content!

Thanks so much Candi!!!!

Bye for now Candi Annie

Interview with Grey Desire

GREY DESIRE – “I put the ‘hole’ in ‘wholesome'”

If you don’t already know Grey Desire, then you should and here’s your chance. I’m sure you’ll be as big a fan as I am after this interview.

Grey Desire

 

LOLA – First, let me say, I cannot believe I’m interviewing you!  You!  Grey Desire!  Blushing.  OK, I just have to get over being star-struck.  I originally found you because you had a very low-budget, homemade movie of you doing about a half hour of yoga poses for beginners.  It looked like you filmed it in your bedroom.  Oh, and you were naked.  It was my regular warm-up for yoga video.  It was a great way to start the day (and also to get off to you after).  But, tell us, how did you get started both with yoga and with making videos of you doing yoga nude.

G.D. – I appreciate all of the excitement very much! I absolutely love when people find me through my nude yoga content. While all of my content is based on concepts I enjoy doing, the yoga content feels the most “me” out of everything! I was a cheerleader throughout my schooling but once that was over, I needed to find a new method for fitness, yoga seemed to be something I could transition to smoothly. Now, I have been doing a regular yoga practice for the last 10 years! The nude yoga content felt very natural to begin, I started it quite early in my porn creation career. I enjoy the eroticism that comes with doing normal, day-to-day tasks in the nude and I find yoga clothing to be restrictive… from there, things just fell into place!

Are you ready to get in shape with Grey Desire?

LOLA – You’re pregnant now – seven months? – and you had one child already.  You produce and post nearly daily videos of you doing yoga and other things while pregnant.  A lot of women who become pregnant also become self-conscious of the changes in their body, shape, and weight gain.  But your work is totally body-positive.  Can you say a bit about your head-space while being pregnant?

G.D. – Yes! I just hit the eight month mark with my second pregnancy this weekend! It is truly so hard to simply exist as a person in the world with the pressures of weight, diet culture and the results of body-shaming. I struggled with a lot of anorexia and bulimia in my cheerleading days and still have to fight off bad tendencies these days. Outside of pregnancy, I often try to gain weight and as soon as it starts to happen, the internal voices come in to tell me I should lose it. But with pregnancy, not only is it a given that you will gain weight but it is recommended! It is so much easier for me to silence the internal voices when I feel the weight I gain is benefiting the little life inside. Pregnancy, and the weight that comes with it, helps me feel like my truest self! The hard part for me is postpartum when the world tells people to “bounce back” and my real goal is to keep the weight.

Preggo Grey Desire

LOLA – Most of your work is of you alone, but occasionally you appear with a man and sometimes with various women.  Can you tell us about what turns you on, gets you off, and when and how you discovered this?

G.D. – My porn originally started as all boy/girl content with my long-term partner. I had so much fun doing it that I just took it all over and basically kicked him out until I needed him again as a stunt cock 😉 Creating content has really helped me discover my turn ons, kinks and interests. It even helped me learn that I’m into women too! Having the freedom and encouragement to explore really let my previously repressed self let loose. As for what those specific kinks are, some of my favorites are just about anything anal, using household objects or foods as toys, stretching and stuffing my holes to the limit and making a mess with bodily fluids!

Grey with Jojo Delow

LOLA – Are you married or dating?  If so, how does your partner handle your internet presence?

G.D. – I am married to a man and also open to dating women! As I mentioned previously, porn creation was something we did together to begin with so he is in full support of what I do. We certainly have boundaries and we maintain open communication throughout to make sure both parties are feeling respected, considering the nature of what I do. Truly, the only aspect he struggles with in regard to my internet presence is the inevitable appearance of “trolls.” I am sure it’s difficult to see a loved one dealing with the effects of the internet. Fortunately, he has been a great resource in helping me discover  and strengthen my confidence to not let them get to me.

Grey Desire

LOLA – Who are your heroes, role models, and inspirations and why?

NoFaceGirl

G.D. – As a faceless creator, some of my immediate inspirations were NoFaceGirl and LeoLulu. Both incredibly talented creators I look up to daily. As I have developed my own style and begun my camming career, I tend to lean more towards full-face models and cam girls for inspiration. Lydia Love, Mary Moody and Cubbi Thompson have been huge role models in the cam world, two of which I have had the pleasure of working with so far! In the video creation realm, I look up to so many! The creativity Elly Clutch brings to her content, the glamour and quality Jewelz Blu provides in her content and the eager, fun and sexual energy Catherine Knight & Dainty Wilder add to their content – all commendable aspects to admire and learn from!

LeoLulu

LeoLulu

LeoLulu

Lydia Love and Grey Desire doing some stretching together

Mary Moody

Mary Moody

Mary Moody

Mary Moody

Mary Moody

Cubbi Thompson at the sauna with friends

Cubbi Thompson and a young friend

Elly Clutch in the Crotch

Jewlez Blu in the dorm

Jewlez Blue coed

Jewelz Blu

Jewelz Blu BDSM

Jewlez Blu extra curricular

Jewelz Blue and friends reading mysexlifewithlola blog

Catherine Knight

Dainty Wilder

Dainty Wilder taken from behind

LOLA – Favorite books, movies, TV shows, porn stars?

G.D. – I wish I had more free time to devote to these but being a full-time MILF does take a lot of time! When I do get the chance to read, I enjoy a lot of Buddhism inspired books, particularly by author Thich Nhat Hanh. Mindfulness and meditation are important aspects in my life. I also have been wanting to dive more into erotic reading and at the top of my list is Match, Cinder & Spark by H.H. Perhaps my first activity once I am out of the newborn trenches.

Ethical Non-Monogamy Magazine article about Lola Yoga

LOLA – You won XBIZ MILF Streamer of the Year 2024.  Tell us how that happened and what that was like?

G.D. – I still do not know how that happened to be honest. I am so incredibly honored and grateful to the people who vote for and support me. The entire experience was incredibly surreal. It truly feels like a massive achievement, especially as a faceless creator. It feels like my efforts in porn creation are being recognized, but most importantly, it feels like the supporters/fans/friends I have made along the way are actually in my corner. The connections I have been able to develop through this line of work are incredible. I am so grateful for the chance to get to know such amazing people and to have their support!

LOLA – In addition to a great body and cute face, you have the most adorable speaking voice.  Ever think about doing ASMR?

G.D. – I get this question and request so often! I have made two incredibly amateur ASMR videos in my career so far. I enjoyed dipping my toes into that realm and would really enjoy being able to explore more. Right now, my efforts are primarily focused on pregnancy content as that phase is so short. Then we’ll have a new bodily fluid to enjoy for a time. Once I am finished with this very niche time in my career, I do hope to branch out further into more kinks and interests, including ASMR content!

LOLA – What is your relationship with your viewers/fans?  Are they respectful?  Do you find that you make content based upon their requests?  And how do you feel about the various kinks that you do – pee, pee enemas, gaping, lactation, odd insertions, queef, etc.?  You’ve come a long way from that first yoga video.

G.D. – I truly feel so much love for my supporters! I have yet to find a word for them that seems accurate, they are much more than supporters, “friends” seems to be a more fitting term. Being able to openly share kinks and the innermost parts of your personality really creates an intimate, close bond. I would say the vast majority are respectful, there are certainly those who are not but that’s what the block button is for 😉 If anything, I struggle more with creating too strong of a connection and being essentially heartbroken when subscriptions inevitably end or lives move in different directions.

All of my public content is related to themes I personally enjoy, and yes, that includes the pee enemas (they’re my fav!). I also offer custom content options that dive more specifically into an individual’s kinks. With those, I branch out of my interests and often cater to things I did not even know existed! It is so fun to explore new things. Sometimes they lead to me developing new kinks and other times, it’s just a fun role to play.

LOLA – Plans for the future?

G.D. – Well, I plan to be doing this for a long while. When people ask how long, I often say I’ll be here creating porn until they think I’m too old and gross to continue, and then maybe five more years after that 😉 I have ambitions of maintaining my streak of creating new videos every week (5 years running), reaching certain follower milestones on various sites, being nominated for and perhaps even winning more awards and most importantly, continuing to create a positive and healthy porn experience for my viewers in as many ways as I can!

If you want to find more of me and my content, visit my website greydesire.com

LOLA – Thank you so much! This has been a great opportunity to learn more about you.

[After our interview, I sent Grey Desire a free copy of Match, Cinder & Spark on audiobook so she could listen while breastfeeding.]

Totally Taboo: Interview with Hani Miletski

WARNING! THIS POST MAY NOT BE FOR YOU. IF YOU DON’T LIKE IT, JUST IGNORE IT.

But, it may also be educational for you.

Statue of “Lola Takes a Lover” surrounded by art of Lola on the Left and Right, and MILF Meri, center.

Totally Taboo

For all you devoted readers of MySexLifeWithLola, you are probably aware that some of our posts are on the more risqué side of sex blogging.  Various of our friends – MILF Meri, Lilly, and even Lo and her sister Robie – engage in sexual practices that are not to everyone’s taste.  We have heard from a lot of you and, for those of you who love these relationships and those of you struggling, we bring you this insightful interview with the pioneer researcher and therapist of some of the most ticklish taboos: bestiality and incest.  Consider this your trigger warning.

Taboos – Popular, Hidden, and Unthinkable – and Interview with Hani Miletski:

In her groundbreaking work on Mother-Son incest, Hani Miletski says about her study that it “provides arguments to support the assumption that the apparent rarity of mother-son incest has more to do with society’s inhibitions and inability to accept the fact that this form of incest exists than with the actual taboo’s strength.  It is as though the taboo is about preventing the belief that mother-son incest exists rather than about preventing it from actually happening.”  Over a hundred years since Freud’s famous “Seduction Theory” shocked the Victorian Age by suggesting that incestuous relationships (mostly involving minors and abuse) happened far more frequently than anyone suspected or was willing to admit, society is still unwilling to admit one form of incest – that involving a desiring mother.

Match, Cinder & Spark on Audible dot Com

Mom & Daughter have “the talk.”

Mom & Daughter

In addition to Miletski’s work, there is also the fine scholarship done in 1992 by Beverly Ann Ogilvie who wrote The Experience of Mother-Daughter Incest, and one earlier work, from 1987, by Karen Louise Kenney, who wrote, Maternal Incest: An Annotated Review of the Literature on Mother-Daughter and Mother-Son Incest.

Desiring Moms

Crime & Punishment

Taking the taboos of society one step further, there is the radical study by Miletski, Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia, in which she engages in primary research with 26 men and 6 women, all of whom engaged in some degree of bestiality and/or zoophilia.  The research was undertaken to understand these people and how they understand themselves.

MILF Meri and son

If you’re interested in this work, then you will want to read this brief interview with Miletski.

  1. You really tackle the most difficult, taboo, and even repressed topics – Mother-Son incest and bestiality. Why? What originally got you interested in these topics?

I like to research topics that I don’t know much about.  It makes any research project much more interesting.

Mother-Son Incest started as my master’s thesis.  I was doing my MSW at Catholic University in DC, and I knew I will be pursuing my certification in sex therapy as soon as I graduate.  So, I wanted my thesis to be about some topic related to sexuality.  But, being at a Catholic university, I couldn’t write about orgasms or erectile dysfunctions, for example, so I chose to write about sexual abuse.  My advisor wanted me to be more specific, so I chose incest.  That was not specific enough for my advisor, so I chose mother-son incest because I had never heard of it at that time, and I was thinking that my thesis will end up being about why mother-son incest never happens, until I started researching it…

Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia started as my doctorate dissertation.  At that time, I was already working as a sex therapist, and one of my clients was into sex with dogs.  I had already started researching the topic because I didn’t know what to do with her, so when it came time to choose a topic for my dissertation, that was an obvious choice, as there was really nothing out there about people who cannot stop thinking of, and wanting to, and having sex with animals.

Lola and Woman’s Best Friend

  1. What was your approach with that patient who was into sex with dogs then and how would it be different after you did your research?

My approach has not changed.  I believe the most important thing as a therapist is to be non-judgmental, open-minded, empathic, curious, attentive, and supportive.  The answers to any questions/problems come from working together with the client, as a team, as we explore various possibilities until we find the best solution.  In my client’s case, she felt extreme shame about her behavior, and she wanted to stop having sex with dogs, but could not.  I helped her realize and accept that this was a sexual orientation that she, obviously, did not choose for herself.  I helped her realize and accept that she was not doing any harm to the dogs (she only had sex with male dogs – they were penetrating her).  And I helped her learn how to be careful so she doesn’t get caught.

Movie Poster from a mainstream movie about bestiality

  1. You mentioned that you had been turned down by at least ten publishers. Did you find it difficult to get your work peer reviewed and published? What sorts of obstacles did you face? What did publishers or even your colleagues say about your work?

I tried to get the book Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia published, but no publisher wanted to touch this subject.  They simply told me that this is not a topic they were interested in, so I ended up self-publishing the book and I have not tried to get it published by a publishing house anymore.   This was 22 years ago.

My colleagues were against my writing my dissertation about this topic, let alone publishing it.  They thought it would pigeon-hole me and it would make potential future clients shy away from seeking my help.  I obviously did not listen to them.  There were probably people over the years who did not contact me for this reason, but the people who did always told me that they felt comfortable telling me all their hidden secrets because if I could deal with bestiality, I could probably deal with everything else.

Art by Pulpbrother

  1. In Understanding Bestiality and Zoophilia, you explicitly open up the question as to bestials or zoophiles being a “sexual orientation.” But you don’t ever take that approach with the mother-son study. Do you think that there is a certain contingent of women out there who are only attracted to either their children (sons, daughters), or to young people? In the wake of every sensational news story about women who seduce minors, especially if the perpetrator is attractive, like Debra Lafave, people always ask, “Why would she do that if she could get anyone she wanted because she’s so beautiful/sexy?” But they don’t seem to understand that it’s not merely about getting physical sexual needs met. What do you think?

Debra Lavave and Ex-Husband, Owen Lafave

Debra Lafave

Debra Lafave

Not Debra Lafave, but purported to be.

Tampa, the Novel inspired by Debra Lafave

I believe there are women who are sexually oriented toward minors, just like some men are.  I honestly never thought about a sexual orientation toward one’s own children, but I guess anything is possible.

  1. Have you read the book Tampa? If so, what are your thoughts?

I have not read this book, but just from the write up about it, it looks like a similar story to the Mary Kay Letourneau scandal, in the early 90s.

  1. When you published Mother-Son Incest in 1995, were you aware of or had you read Beverly Ann Ogilvie’s 1992 study, The Experience of Mother-Daughter Incest? If you’re familiar with it, what similarities and differences do you find in the two taboo relationships?

Mom & Daughter Tease

Unfortunately, I have not been aware of this study.  I was aware of Rosencrans’ (1997) study of 93 daughters and nine sons who had been sexually abused by their mothers.  Nine men heard about her study and asked to participate in it.  She ended up adding a chapter in her book (The Last Secret: Daughters Sexually Abused by Mothers) about these nine men.  Although all nine men admitted to having had incestuous relationships with their mothers, 89 percent of the sons (eight men) believed they had a normal childhood, compared to only two percent of the 93 daughters.  All nine men felt they were their mothers’ lovers and did not perceive themselves as victims.

Mom & Daughter

  1. When you did your study on bestials and zoos, you mention a few times about how new the internet is and how new you were to it. Since then, the internet has developed quite a bit. Have you seen what people are posting now depicting bestiality? What are your thoughts?

Knotty Fairy getting off to Lola

Last I checked, it’s all about pornography.  All the online groups/listservs/websites/etc. that used to be around when I was doing my study, they all disappeared.  The ones that came after, came and went.  They always face threats from outsiders and sometimes even from within the community.  It’s a shame.

Fan pic, getting off to Lo

Fan pic, getting off to Lola

Fan Photo Getting off to Lola

Fan Photo, Getting Off to Lo

Fan Photo, Getting off to Lo

Fan Photo, Getting off to Lo

  1. Desiring women have become more prevalent in popular culture, whether we’re talking Frankie Shaw’s character in MILF, Mary-Louise Parker’s character in Weeds, Zooey Deschanel’s character in The New Girl, or Y tu mamá también. All these popular shows include the desirous dimension of women in ways that were taboo not long ago. Do you think that, as a culture, America is ready to explore the famous “dark continent” of women’s sexuality, as Freud called it?

Marie-Louise Parker

Frankie Shaw of SMILF

Frankie Shaw, SMILF scene

SMILF with Frankie Shaw Look Carefully and you’ll see what gets Frankie Shaw off.

Zooey Deschanel

I think this question is too theoretical.  I think the U.S. has come a long way regarding the acceptance of women’s sexuality, but the U.S. is very large, with a huge population, many various cultures, and countless opinions, so I would not attempt to make such a guess.

Art Appreciation 101 – The Minotaur

  1. Both bestiality and mother-son incest are among the more prevalent themes in Greco-Roman mythology. How do you account for that?

Meri and son – very Oedipal

They are among the most taboo in practically every culture.  The more something is taboo, the more curious people are about it.  It’s human nature.  And, by the way, these two themes are also among the most popular pornographic themes and the most visited sites.

  1. One of the most obvious, yet least discussed, images of mother-son incest is in the depiction of Venus and Cupid/Aphrodite and Eros.  They are considered mother and son and often depicted in sexually suggestive poses.  Given that these are the mythical origins of sexual desire, do you think there is something deep in our psyche that ties sexuality with this primary relationship?

There probably is something deep in our psyche that ties sexuality with this primary relationship.  I talk about it in my book.

From the Bible – Lot and His Daughters

Sisters – Lo and Robie

  1. What about mother-daughter incest?  Though you call mother-son incest “the unthinkable broken taboo,” wouldn’t mother-daughter incest, since it is almost never depicted (in myth, legend, art, or psychological studies), be even more “unthinkable” for that very reason?

Very possible.  In my book/thesis I was focusing on mother-son incest, but that does not mean that mother-daughter incest is not, or maybe even more, unthinkable.

MILF Meri

Still Crazy After All These Years!

You might think that the title of this post is referring to HH and me, your beautiful blog bunny, Lola. Well, it’s not. It’s referring to an inspiring older couple, Mr. and Mrs. E, who have a Just For Fans site that is just amazing!

Mr. E is a talented artist, and his talent shows in his photography. Mrs. E is his muse and a beautiful model. Together they are a couple that other kinky couples can admire and hope to inspire.

The Mrs. is a fan of Match, Cinder & Spark!

Here’s my interview with them:

Q: I went through your whole Just For Fans. It looks like you started back in late 2019, but you migrated there from Tumblr. When did you two start with the erotic photography?

A: Mr E: I wanted to show her, how erotic and sexy she was/is… so we played around just for us. Watching the pictures on big TV-screen and having fun.

Mrs E: Very often the shoots lead to passionate fucking sessions.

Mr E.: Around 2015 I discovered tumblr. – that was great, you could post uncensored, had great style, nice Archive. Perfect – We had 85K Followers, when the tumblr purge started. They deleted our blog – with 12K pictures…

Mrs E: He was devastated… we were devastated… than MeWe came along, they also deleted some blogs…

Mr E: Then I was looking for a safe haven… where we could keep the nerds and idiots out. The money (it’s only 1/10 of what we (mostly me !) spend on lingerie…) – One platform we like, but lately problems with the followers counter, is X formerly Twitter…

Mrs E: I love to see the posts on the big TV-screen, also after every shooting…

 

 

 

Q: I was going to say, it looks like you spend a lot on lingerie! Was it a fetish for both of you, or did you both grow into it? Does Mr E ever like to wear the lingerie? (BTW, that’s a BIG turn-on for me – men in panties and nylons, etc.)

A: Mrs E: I always loved lingerie, but Mr E really got me into it…

Mr E: I was always a big fan of stockings and garters and nylons, and for the shoots I was looking for nice stuff… from every business trip she got some pieces…

 

 

Q: I see that Gunter Blum and Roy Stuart are featured in some of your photos. Are they big influences on either of you? Who else is an influence in the photos you take?

A: Mr E – Artistic and aesthetically a lot of artists had an influence on me… photographer: beside the ones you mentioned, are H. Newton, Araki, Knoll and others…

Mrs E: I loved it when he brought the newest LEG SHOW issue home…. great inspiration…

 

 

Q: For Mrs E: I see in some of the photos images of you apparently getting off to other photos of sexy, scantily clad or naked women. Are you into women? More generally, what are your kinks and do you have sex with anyone besides or in addition to Mr.?

I think she’s into Lola Down

A: Mrs E: I have a lot of close female friends, love to look at sexy women, but I’m not into women. We had some experiences with other couples (not really satisfying) and few MMF – one was fine, but from far away… He loves to fantasize about us with another man…

Q: Well, I will admit, I wish it was my photos all over the wall in this beautiful picture! (wallpaper)

A: Mr E: that’s a funny crazy story: coming home from a business, she surprised me with a Paperwall (between a door) covered with this porn collage. It was a Lucky Hole!!!!

Q: Do either of you care to share how it came about and what inspired it? (Squid photo)

A: Mrs E: Mr E loves to cook! Holidays on a Island with a great population of these delicious animals made us fantasize… btw. it was delicate cooked… lol –

Q: Tell me, what are your hopes, dreams, plans for the future with regard to the erotic photography? Do you think you’ll make a book of it?

A: Mr E: We don’t plan to much, as long as we love what we do, we carry on… and yes a book is one of our opportunities… or NFT… but all is vague…

Q: I see in one of the photos, she’s reading “Talk Dirty to Me.” What sort of erotica do you two (or each of you) enjoy? What sort of porn? Do you like to masturbate together or alone or both?

Favorite Erotica? Match, Cinder & Spark

A: Mrs E – I read everything from classic erotic literature to pornographic texts. But I like it best when he reads to me, his dark erotic voice turns me on… I like looking at other women, old Leg Show magazines or artistic pornography. That’s why our favorite go-to erotica has been your Match, Cinder & Spark books! Every now and then we watch porn together, sometimes just as a silent background wallpaper.

Mr E: I am well-educated in pornography. LOL – I’ve always been interested in the history of pornography. As a media person, I’m a porn gourmet, even if I enjoy home cooking now and then. I read a lot, including theoretical writings on pornography, so it was obvious to try to create aesthetic pornography yourself.

Lola: Thank you both for this interview – it was such a turn-on to talk with you and to learn from you!!! We both wish you two the best with your erotic adventures!

Go check out Mr. and Mrs. E at stillcrazyafteralltheseyears on Just For Fans!