Mysterious Witt – Very Witty & Sexy

Mysterious Witt
Match, Cinder & Spark

 

This week, please allow us to introduce a wonderful writer, lover, mom, sex worker, and keyboard comedian – Mysterious Witt!

We’ve been following her on Medium for a while, but recently a few things have happened that changed her and her approach. Her partner was diagnosed with a tumor in his neck and she has shed the shame of those who would judge her and revealed her face for all to see.

She has worked as a dominatrix, worked as a sex author at Hustler and Playboy, had kids, and then recently tried to get back in the biz. But mostly her experiences, past and present, make for incredible reading in the articles she posts on Medium. She also has a Twitter handle and an OnlyFans page, Instagram and a few more outlets for her creative mind and body!

Mysterious Witt
Match, Cinder & Spark

But perhaps her greatest talent is, as her name suggests, her wit!  Her Twitter one-liners are so witty that she seems to be the female reincarnation of Nietzsche, bringing back the aphorism!

Here are a few examples for you to enjoy:

I have time for a little drama, but not much.

Good taste is the enemy of art.

A woman’s breasts point outward and are a source of power.

I’m leaning into a woman-led kind of sexual openness that isn’t either shame on one side, or porn on the other. There’s something in the middle but it’s hard to find. Often as women, we move between patriarchal definitions of our sexuality. We have to define our own.
It’s really hard as a recovering people pleaser to acknowledge that not everyone likes me. But whatever.
My DILF just made me pancakes for Father’s Day. Never too late to have a happy childhood, eh?
Here’s where you can find more of her:
Mysterious Witt is a writer and pro-sex educator.
To read her articles about sex, follow her on Medium https:mysteriouswitt.medium.com.
To learn more about her life, follow her on Instagram instagram.com/mysterious_wit.
To hear her speak, follow her on Clubhouse clubhouse.com/@sexwriter.

Mysterious Witt

Free Books Benefit Everyone!

Hey Friends, Fans, and Fiends out there!  As you all know, we had a Valentine’s Day promotion to help people through the difficult times of COVID-19.  We sent a free copy of our books to fans and all we asked in return was that they send back some sexy photos of themselves with our book strategically placed.  Well, the friends with benefits program is paying off.  We are pleased – very pleased – to help promote some of our fans with a Twitter “OnlyFans” account and also present to you other, non-professional, fans who wrote back to us.

First we have the sexy Samantha Massie, a.k.a. Southernbella1.  She is a real Southern belle, hailing from Georgia, raised in a very proper Christian household, she and her hubby, Justin, have three young kids.  Though she’s a certified medical assistant (CMA), she’s trying to make ends meet for the family and to earn enough to go back to college to get her registered nursing degree.  After she asked her friend and professional photographer, Dan, to take some boudoir photos of her as a gift to her hubby, he liked what he saw so much that he encouraged Samantha to monetize her assets on Twitter.  He suggested posting sexy nudes on her OnlyFans page (southernbella1).  He fully supports her in this and, who knows, maybe even wants her to be a hotwife someday like me!  Please go out and support Samantha and her college goals and her family by subscribing to her Twitter OF page.  You will be very glad you did!!!

We will be having more of our promotional stars soon. Write in to us if you would like to be on the list for our May is Masturbation Month promotion!!! downloladown@gmail.com

Samantha Massie and Match, Cinder & Spark

Samantha Massie and Match, Cinder & Spark

Samantha Massie and Match, Cinder & Spark

Samantha Massie and Match, Cinder & Spark

Samantha Massie

Samantha’s sexy feet

Samantha Massie

Samantha Massie

Guest Post: A Birthday Hat Trick

Recently an older hotwife, Nancy Fairchild, sent in this lovely birthday story for us to publish. She is a great writer, a sexy ex-pat, and a kindred spirit. You can find her work on Medium.com. The photos are hers and she asked us to post them.

By Nancy Fairchild

nancy.fairchild@hushmail.com

Nancy Fairchild

I can actually date the start of this true story because it began on my birthday in 2015. I may be dizzy but I usually remember what day I was born on but, as time goes on, I get a little forgetful about the year because in 2015 I decided that I didn’t want to get any older and that complicated things. My husband figured out how to fix that for me, which is why I love him so much. He’s a genius with figures. To give you an example, right now I was born in 1985 but in 2015 I was born in 1980. Brian explained it to me how it works one time, but it was a little over my head.

Brian not only has excellent taste in women but a fashion sense that is out of this world and a wallet large enough to spoil me silly. How many women are married to men who get hard when they buy something for their wife? I don’t ‘let’ my husband spoil me; I actively encourage it because it makes him happy. The Sunday Times writer, Adrian Gill, who unfortunately passed away a year ago, said some straight men are born with a gay gene in them that translates into a style sense that few heterosexual men possess. That’s Brian, in a nutshell: straight as an arrow but with the fashion and style sense of a gay fashion designer.

In 2015 I transformed myself from a naughty wife to an art slut and I attribute that to a few factors, not least of which was the shopping spree Brian took me on in Bond Street on my birthday. First there were the three pairs of Louis Vuitton shoes, all heels in different shades of patent leather. Three pairs of 7 for all Mankind jeans, very tight fit and very slutty. Two black cashmere turtleneck sweaters from Hugo Boss and finally a three quarter’s length black leather jacket from Zadig & Voltaire. I didn’t look at the price and I didn’t even try it on, Brian just knew it would work on me and bought it. The lingerie, which he bought for me at Agent Provocateur, was just the icing on the cake.

Brian likes me to have a ‘look’ and what he was going for was sort of like a rock groupie look circa 1980s but updated to be more modern. I like it when Brian does this to me because it takes away my underlying reluctance to change. Knowing he has impeccable taste; I trust his judgment entirely and just let him do his work.

Nancy Gives Head

Brian could work in a top London hair salon. He doesn’t. He works on legal briefs for American law firms which pay him a fortune and that allows him to spoil me. But Brian taught himself how to be an excellent stylist and he always does my hair and on that day in 2015 he had an idea that became my trademark for the entire winter and up to this day. Brian cut off two inches of my shoulder length blonde hair and added a hot pink streak to the left side of my part. After the dye set and he washed and blew dry my hair, he helped me get dressed in my outfit of expensive lingerie, tight blue jeans, cashmere black turtleneck, pink patent heels and the pièce de résistance, the black leather three quarter length leather coat. When I looked at myself in the full-length mirror, I was initially too shocked to tell Brian I didn’t really like the look at all. It didn’t feel like it was me, I looked like someone else entirely.

It took me about thirty minutes to completely change my mind. The nice thing about having a lover living in the same building is a second opinion is always at hand. I told Brian I was going to nip over to see Adrian to find out what he thought of my new look. Of course, Brian knows Adrian had been fucking me for the last five years, as did everyone else in the entire building. When I saw the disappointed look on his face, I told him not to fret, I’d be back in 30 minutes.

I crossed the courtyard in the center of our apartment building. I knew Adrian was home because the lights were on in his apartment. When I knocked on the door and he opened it, he had a startled expression on his face that quickly broke into a smile.

“You look hotter than I’ve ever seen you,” he said as he drew me inside and locked his lips on mine. “I want to fuck you right now.”

He had the leather coat off in seconds and my jeans pulled down to my knees. He didn’t bother taking my knickers off, he just pushed them aside as he bent me over and fucked me from behind. No foreplay at all, just a hard cock in my pussy within a minute. Adrian fills my pussy entirely. I need well endowed lovers. My pussy isn’t made for underendowed men. I sort of lost track of time and just enjoyed being ravaged by Adrian but I could tell he was super turned on and he was going to cum quickly. He reached his arm around my back and his fingers found my clit which he rubbed until I came with a moan. His moan came shortly thereafter as he pumped me full of his hot cum. Then he did something he had never done before and slapped me briskly on my bare ass.

“Ouch, what’s that for?” I cried out.

“It’s for being the slut you are,” Adrian said, with a hint of anger in his voice. “If you walk around like that, dressed the way you are, every man is going to want you.”

I was a bit pissed off at Adrian as I pulled up my jeans and zipped them, but I was inwardly very pleased he was jealous. After numerous affairs since our marriage and the move from New York to London, Brian had lost the ability to be jealous, which is probably a good coping mechanism for him, but it made me feel a bit disappointed sometimes. Making Adrian jealous was a good substitute, though.

“That’s too bad,” I replied with a smile. “Because I’m just beginning to really like this look. I think I will have Brian buy me some shorter skirts to wear for the winter. I love my hair too. Brian is going to take me out for my birthday. I hope I get some attention tonight.”

“Every horny man will get hard as a rock when they see you,” Adrian said, with an irritated look on his face. “You won’t make it home tonight. Brian will, alone as usual.”

Adrian’s prediction was quite prescient, but I didn’t know it at the time. It was 6:30 pm when I was walking across the courtyard, once again, back to my apartment this time. The night was young, and I had already been fucked once. I opened the door and found Brian in the kitchen and kissed him on the lips.

“Don’t worry, I didn’t suck his cock,” I said playfully, growing more pleased at how jealous I had made Adrian. “He thinks my look is too hot and every man will want me, so he’s worried that he will lose his place in line.”

“Your look isn’t too hot,” Brian said as he held me. “I wasn’t going for that. You look ultra-cool and hip. That’s the look I wanted. You look far too hip to be with an American lawyer tonight.”

Once again, another prescient prediction, but this time from my husband. Of course, I brushed it aside. Brian is handsome in a drop dead sort of way and he’s younger than me and makes a fortune, and he’s completely and totally faithful to the point that I have never seriously worried about what goes on behind my back. Being by his side makes me sort of sparkle and the security he provides, both emotionally and financially, allows me to be the woman I am.

I went back to the full-length mirror and looked at myself again. Brian was right. I looked younger and edgier. I just didn’t appreciate it at first. That was the point I fell in love with the look and changed forever the way I dressed.

Here’s an unsolicited tip for naughty wives who like younger men: dress hip. It is an ageless look. Don’t wear frocks that shows off your ‘decolletage’ unless, of course, you’re interested in the village vicar. I’ve seen 50-year-old women that have a couple of 20 year old studs in tow because they’re smart enough to know that men crave hip women.

“Where are we going for dinner?” I asked Brian when I returned to the kitchen. I was glowing because I had just been bent over and fucked very recently and was really beginning to love the way the new woman Brian had created looked.

Sexy Nancy

“We’re going to Launceston Place,” Brian said. “We have reservations at 8:00 pm. We can go out for a drink at a pub nearby because there aren’t any pubs around the restaurant.”

Ten minutes later we were at the Phoenix pub on Moscow Road, just a hundred meters from our apartment. It was crowded and Brian couldn’t locate a table. We were just about to leave when I heard my name called out and saw a familiar face waving us over to a table for four that had two unoccupied chairs.

“God, you look fucking fantastic,” Stuart exclaimed when Brian and I neared the table. “I love your look. Did you have an army of stylists around you today? You could have come right off a fashion shoot.”

Stuart and I had known each other for a few years because I have bought some art from his gallery, which was on Chepstow Road, just across from our apartment building. I had mistakenly always assumed he was gay. I wasn’t thoroughly and completely disabused of that notion until about thirty minutes later. He had a friend with him who he introduced as the next Lucien Freud of the London art scene. Stuart was handsome in an aristocratic manner and his young friend, Kurt, was sort of beautiful. Slim of frame, I thought he was sort of asexually attractive at first. I’d find out the real truth at the same time that Stuart’s true sexuality was revealed.

“Not really,” I replied with a smile. “I just have a husband who has impeccable taste and he transformed me for my birthday. We’re out for a quick drink before we have dinner.”

I could speak freely because Brian had gone off to buy a bottle of wine and procure a couple of glasses at the bar. Stuart had a little bit of knowledge about my scandalous past and was always eager to get more dirt from me.

“Are you still fucking the professor?” he asked with a smile. “You could really do much better. You are the hottest women in this pub by a longshot. Look around, nobody can keep their eyes off you. I could fuck you here and now.”

I did a quick glance around the bar and noticed I was getting an undue amount of attention which was beyond flattering and egged on my naughty streak even further. I saw Brian trying to fight his way to the bar and knew he would be a few more minutes and I could talk openly for a bit longer with Stuart.

“I thought you were gay,” I replied to Stuart with a laugh. “I’m sorry if that sounds presumptuous of me, but I thought you liked boys.”

“That’s an act I play for the art scene,” Stuart said in a more serious tone. “No, I’m straight and I wanted to fuck you from the day I saw you, and I’m sure Kurt does as well.”

“Agreed,” Kurt chimed in. “You are very, very hot and I got hard when I first saw you. Stuart has talked to me often about you. He’s wanted to fuck you for years.”

“Why don’t you ditch your husband now and come back to my place with Kurt,” said Stuart with a mischievous grin. “Let’s celebrate your birthday with a bang.”

“That would be tremendously rude of me,” I replied, although against my somewhat limited better judgment, I was actually considering it, just because it came out of the blue and I wanted to change my lifestyle and lovers to match my new look. I needed some great spark to embark on a new journey in life. I have been rude to Brian before and disappointed him numerous times because I can do that and not worry he will be shocked and hurt beyond belief. He expects the unexpected out of me.

“I hope you don’t mind that I was fucked not so long ago,” I said as I stood up from the table. “Don’t worry, it wasn’t my husband.”

I grabbed my purse and began sauntering towards the door. Stuart and Kurt quickly followed. Thirty minutes later the former had his cock deep inside my pussy while I was trying concentrate on taking the latter deep in my throat. Nothing is perfect but the timing of their orgasms was only seconds apart. After our brief and hurried sex,  I wandered around the apartment, just in my heels, looking at the art Stuart had collected while my two young lovers relaxed nude on the sofa where they had just taken me for the first time. Eventually, I sat between them and touched each of them with my fingers, lightly rubbing their cocks, to see if they had recovered.

“I want both of your cocks in my pussy at the same time,” I told Stuart and Kurt. “I want you both to stretch my pussy. I’ve never done that before.”

I took sideways glances at each of them and they both wordlessly nodded their agreement. I arranged their bodies on the sofa, so their legs intertwined and their cock and balls were touching each other. I sat on top and held both cocks in my hand and lowered myself on them slowly letting my pussy get adjusted to the girth of their combined cocks. After I felt totally comfortable, I held them deep inside my pussy and began riding them, gradually picking up tempo until my body was covered in sweat. I bucked on top of them until Kurt came first inside me and Stuart exploded a few seconds later. I was exhausted, afterwards. I stood up on very shaky legs and fell down between them on the sofa. My pussy was overflowing with warm spunk.

“I hope you don’t think I’m an easy woman, or a slut,” I said playfully. “I did wait until I knew Kurt’s name before I fucked you both. A real slut wouldn’t have bothered asking.”

“By the way,” I added. “How do I go back now to only wanting one cock in my pussy.”

“You don’t,” Stuart replied. “Kurt and I will both be fucking you together a lot from now on. We’ll also be taking you around to enjoy the art scene so that’s less time at home for you in the future and more time here on the sofa between us.”

I looked at the wall clock and noted that it was almost 9:00 pm. I had already fucked three men so far today and I had a chance to make it four. In ice hockey I think I would have already done a hat trick.

“I’ve got to get up and go home to my husband,” I said. “I was really rude to leave Brian in the bar like that.”

“You’re not going anywhere until the morning” Kurt said, with a surprising command in his voice, moving his right hand to my pussy and flicking my clit with his fingers. “We aren’t done fucking you.”

“Wow,” I replied. “I like a man who tells me what to do. I guess I can join my husband for breakfast. Besides, after you both fucked me at the same time, I don’t think Brian would get much pleasure from my pussy.”

“What are we going to do about that tonight?” Stuart asked.

“I guess you’ll have to learn how to fist me,” I replied.

I haven’t always kept the hot pink streak in my hair for the last five years. Brian has changed it to blue, orange, black and back to hot pink again. Hanging out with Stuart and Kurt has been a constant, as well as the wild times on their sofa. Through them I have met Damien Hurst, Tracey Emin, David Hockney and other great contemporary British artists and there are a couple of nude paintings of me hung in some very expensive homes in London.

My self-destructive relationship with Adrian has diminished to very infrequent trysts and I have replaced him with two lovers who are much more exciting and far more devoted to me. Brian has grown even handsomer in the last five years. Running off, as I did, on that night irritated him briefly but I came home the next day happier than I had been in years. He liked that a lot.

Shag Story Interview with Gabi Levi

We’re very excited to bring you this Special Report!

Most of you surely already know the wonderful Kayla Lords of erotic blogging and podcast fame, a.k.a. The Smutlancer.  If you don’t, check her out. She has done amazing work and she continues to do something that all of us need to do more – build kink community!

She has teamed up with Gabi Levi – an artist and writer and, if you ask me, probably a great shag – to create a retro themed, art infused corner of the internet for erotic stories and images called Shag Story.

Gabi reached out to us to get our impression of the new site and we LOVED it! I (Lola) started chatting with her and soon enough, we just put together an interview.  So, without further introduction, my interview with Gabi Levi:

Gabi Levi, self portrait

What is your background in art? 

I went to the Gallatin School of Individualized Study at NYU and essentially developed my own major titled Art and Ethics. It was based on an amazing course I took that took a look at the ethical implications of art that maybe was a little bit risqué in a number of ways. It questions its value to society and I always took the stance that provocative art was incredibly valuable, so I started to make some of it.

Who has influenced you?

So many artists, but Magritte is a big one along with various pop artists, comic book creators, and pulp artists. I also love Playboy.

Rene Magritte – Nude Standing

 

 

 

Lola – Nude Standing

What attracts you about erotica or erotic art in particular?

I appreciate the beauty of sex, the human form, and pop culture. As someone who is both an artist and a writer, combining the art with erotica felt natural to me.

Tell us about this new venture, Shag Story (or shagstory.com), that you and Kayla Lords have started. How did you two come up with the idea? Who is your ideal audience?  What sorts of stories do you hope to publish and why?

I wanted to start an erotica site that felt fun and incorporated art. I loved the 70s Playboy aesthetic, so decided to call it Shag Story as a way to allow for some retro art. In terms of audience, it’s anyone who enjoys erotica. Shag Story is a fun place to hang out, embrace eroticism, and enjoy erotic art and writing. I wanted to create a feel-good space.

Why the 70’s theme?

The ’60s-’70s were a time of sexual liberation and revolution. It feels fun, exciting, and like a party.

Who is writing for Shag Story?

Various writers! We always have an open call for submissions that are published upon Kayla’s review.

What is your role at Shag Story?

Along with being one of the founders, I am in charge of the art direction.

What are some of your favorite books and why?

I love Lolita and anything by Elizabeth Wurtzel. Lolita is another great example of a piece of art that is ‘morally corrupt’ but so beautifully written and flawlessly executed. It stirs up mixed emotions, which I think makes something great.

Lola’s Playboy Cover

What are some of your favorite movies and why?

I love Natural Born Killers from an aesthetic and artistic perspective. It’s so jarring, interesting, and beautiful in a sense that isn’t traditional. The acting is also incredible. Watching it is a cathartic experience for me.

If you could meet one person, past or present, who would it be and why?

This answer might be silly, but I’ve always said Eminem. He’s such a genius, so uninhibited, and so talented.

Tell us your most recent or most frequent sexual fap fantasy.

It depends on the day, but most recently it was a fantasy/memory of a time with an ex in the back of his car during summer. Very hot and sticky ;).

I’m allowed one vanity question.  One thing that attracts you about mysexlifewithlola.com?

It’s smart, candid, and sexy!! Who wouldn’t love it?

Lola & Shag Story created by Gabi Levi

 

Open Auditions

Littlegem of PurplesGem reads about Lola Down

 

As I have mentioned in the past, we receive a lot of fan mail.  Most of it is for Lo, of course, but, on occasion, I receive a kind epistle from an adoring fan.  Sometimes, the cursory reader gets confused.  Like the time a guy wrote to Lo saying, “You’re an incredible writer.”

She wrote back, “No, no.  Not me.  My man, HH.  He does the writing, I do the fucking.”

Lo and HH – much younger.

Recently, one fan of my writing wrote in asking if Lo ever gets enough pleasure and, “Do you ever get tired of writing about sex or is it always fresh for you?”

Lo was sitting on the couch reading the email, her bare legs spread as one hand held her phone and the other pleasured herself (she never gets enough pleasure – there’s the answer to your first questions), when she looked up at me, sitting at the other end of the couch, to read to me the fan’s email.

I pondered for a moment, we discussed it a bit, and she responded, “We have these amazing adventures that we just want to share with other people.  I guess it’s like a travel blog, but for sex.  We like to take you on our journeys with us.”

“How about we make it more like a food blog?” I asked Lo.  “I eat you out and then I can write about the four-course meal later.”

“Four courses?”

“Yeah: pussy, ass, mouth, and then you lick my popsicle for dessert.”

“As much fun as that sounds, slide over here and look at this,” she said.

She spread her legs wider and I sat between them.  One of her legs was up on my lap and the other behind my back.  “I like this,” I said, looking at her delectable body.

“You might like this even more because it appeals to your insatiable ego.”

“Oh yeah?  Well, you have my attention now!”

“I didn’t before?”

“Before you had my erection.”

“Let me see,” she demanded.

“No.  First you show me whatever it is that’s going to aggrandize my ego.”

“I said ‘appeal to your ego.’  It’s impossible aggrandize.  I don’t think it could get any bigger.”

“Are we still talking about my ego?”

“Take a look at this,” she said, turning her phone so I could see the photo.

It showed a beautiful naked woman reading, Match, Cinder & Spark, Volume: III, Writing Under Cover.

“Oh my!  Who is that?!”

Littlegem,” she said, referring to one of our blogging community friends across the pond.

“Really?”

“You like?”

“Yes,” I said emphatically.  It’s one thing to be told that my writing turns people on, but to see it happening is quite thrilling.

“And that’s not all,” said Lo, swiping the photo to reveal another.  The second photo was in black-and-white.

“Wow!”

“OK,” said Lo, “I was wrong.  Apparently there was room for your ego to grow.”

“Something’s growing alright.”

“Then I shouldn’t tell you what else Littlegem said.”

“Tell, tell!”

“Well. . . she said she wants to do a recording of her reading your writing while having her clit teased.”

“Like Stoya did for ‘Hysterical Literature’?”

Stoya Reading MySexLifeWithLola

“Don’t mention her.”

“Oh, right.  Still, that’s amazing!”

“I think it would be great because I got an email from another fan who is blind.”

“Blind?!”

“Yes, blind.”

“How the hell did he find our blog?”

“Apparently, he has someone read the stories for him.”

“Oh my God!  That is one of the hottest things I’ve ever heard!!!”

“Yeah,” said Lo, “and it got me thinking.  We should totally do an audio book since I’m sure there are lots of long-distance haulers who would like to have me as their companion across the lonely stretches of highway.”

“I’m sure they would.”

“And people who want to hear about my sexcapades on their way to work.”

“The morning drive will never be the same.”

“And insomniacs who could use a good bedtime story.”

“Nothing like a good wank at the end of a long day to induce sleep.”

“So you see, it’s really necessary for everyone’s well-being that we do this.”

“Indubitably.  And are you going to be the one to record the stories?”

“Oh no!” said Lo.  “I’m no actor.  All my orgasms are real.”

“Of course.  Then who?”

“I’ll put out a call for open auditions.”

[Note to reader, if you haven’t checked out PurplesGem yet, you really should. They’re a great BDSM/kink couple. Great writing and photos. Below are some of our favorite photos from them, with permission, of course.]

[p.s.  – If YOU want to audition for our audiobook, then go to ACX.com and look for “Match, Cinder & Spark.”  If you can’t find it, email us: downloladown@gmail.com]

Cake & Bar – Interview with a Kinky Amateur Porn Couple

In the past we have periodically featured some letters and guest posts from some of our readers.  Because we’ve received so much mail in the past year, we are now including a regular feature of kinky letters and write-in questions.  To start us off, we begin with a lovely couple that go by the names of Cake & Bar (you’ll find out why below.) They have a Tumblr and they post short films of their sexy passion for each other:

Q: Let’s begin with the name.  What’s Cake and Bar all about?

A: Well, Bar loves cheesecake (the actual food) and also loves Cake’s ass, so her name came easy. Bar has a very veiny dick and looks like a big Snickers when it’s fully erect, so that was the inspiration. The name is are also a play on us being an interracial couple.

Q: It looks like you started your Tumblr in July 2017.  Is this exhibitionism something new for you two?  How’d you get into it?

A: We started our Tumblr after being suspended from Twitter permanently for some odd reason. Tumblr was another way for us to share our sexuality and advertise for our porn movies on Manyvids. We’ve been on Manyvids for a year now, so yes we guess you could say we’re new to exhibitionism and porn making in general. Bar has always loved taking pictures of Cake, so one day he asked if we could start posting pictures anonymously to see the feedback we would get it from other people and the rest is history. For the most part it has been nothing but positive experiences.

Q: How long have you been a couple?

A: We’ve been together 15 years and been married 5 years and we have 2 children.

Q: Are you currently monogamous?  If not, what’s the relationship like?

A: Yes, we’re monogamous.

Q: How has been the response to your posting pics and films of yourselves?  A lot of Tumblr folks complain of people being rude or having derogatory things to say.  That hasn’t been our experience.  What about you?

A: For the most part we’ve had positive responses to the things we’ve shared. There’s always going to be some negative, but we take it in stride because it’s expected with the internet.

Q: You don’t show your faces in the pics/vids.  Do you worry that you’ll be found out?

A: We don’t worry per se about being found out, but we like anonymity and the masks give us something else to set the scene with.

Q: Do any of your friends/family know about your kinky side?

A: Only 2 of our friends know we make porn and they’re totally supportive of us.

Q: What do you each like (in terms of sex/porn)?

A, Bar: Straight amatuer porn, mostly Interracial and Black. Some professional porn like the Greg Lanskys stuff.

A, Cake: Doesn’t enjoy watching porn as much as she likes shooting it.

HH & Lo: Thanks so much!!!!

Cake & Bar: You’re welcome and thanks for your patience with our response.

Some photos from Cake & Bar getting off to Lola (more can be found at their Tumblr and at loladown.tumblr.com):

 

 

Winky Face and a Smile!

So, a while ago, our dear friend Cara Thereon posted some very sexy selfies and put out a request for fans to suggest poses.

We suggested she do a little “cumtribution” – her getting off to our pics/blog.  She wrote to us and very flatteringly requested some photos featuring HH.  They were duly sent and then today we saw these hot hot hot pics!!!

If you like excellent erotica and very sexy photos of one sexy and smart woman, then definitely check her out.

We have known Cara since the early days of our blogging – back when she used to blush at naughty photos and tell us how she would get too excited looking at porn.  (Is there such a thing as too excited?)  Now look at her, making us too excited.

Thank you, and we are looking forward to the sexy boudoir session next time your in our neighborhood!

xoxoxo,

Lola & HH

p.s. – Here’s the pics we sent her.

holdtight

handjob

lips41lips51

sidekick2

Guest Post – Squirting, Masturbating, Sex

[A big thank you to Laura from The School of Squirt for her short and sweet submission.)

laura school of squirt

What Did I Just Do? Am I Okay?

I was eighteen years old, full of hormones, and still a virgin. I was all but

desperate to experience my first orgasm, and that weekend, it was going to happen!

I had been dating a guy for a couple of months and had finally decided I

was “ready”. We had planned on hanging out that weekend, and though I hadn’t told

him yet that I was ready, he made it very clear that he was willing as soon as I gave

the word. I hadn’t actually told him I was a virgin though. I just kept telling him I

thought we should know each other really well first. Now that I was ready, I was

terrified that I wasn’t going to be able to handle the “pain” of losing my virginity, and

I didn’t want my guy to realize I hadn’t been honest with him. So I concocted a plan.

I would lose my virginity to a dildo.

I had a plan, now I needed the dildo. I hopped in the car and drove to the nearest

adult store. I thought I was incredibly cool and daring. Once I got there, I walked in

on a mission and grabbed the prettiest vibrating dildo I could find, it was pink with a

pearl finish. I had decided it was probably a good idea to pick out an adult film to go

with my ridiculously clever plan. Once I found a movie, I was ready, I was going to

go home and have my way with myself.

I was so excited when I walked into my apartment that my panties were soaked.

I sat everything down, put batteries in the vibrator, popped the movie in, took off all

of my clothes, sat on the couch, and spread my legs wide. My clit was swollen. I was

As the movie played I turned the vibrator on and went to work. So many feelings

and thoughts were running through my mind, and then it happened. Not only did my

cherry pop that day but out of nowhere the most intense, amazing, and satisfying

orgasm I would ever had came shooting out of my pussy. I had squirted everywhere

as my body shook and clenched. The orgasm itself had lasted a couple of minutes

straight and was nothing like anything I had ever heard of. I was immediately scared.

Once my body finally relaxed and I was capable of standing, I went to the

bathroom to examine myself. I didn’t know what to think. I had never heard of

anything like that before, and I had certainly never seen anything like it. I asked

myself, “What did I do? Am I okay?”. I had to talk to someone, but I didn’t want

anyone to know what I had been doing. I called my boyfriend and asked if he would

come over. I told him it was really important and that I absolutely needed to talk to

him. He was on his way.

Once he arrived I explained everything. I told him about my plan, the dildo, the

porn I was watching, about the liquid that had shot out of me, how good it felt, and

how scared I was. Of course, unlike me, he knew exactly what had happened and

wanted nothing more than to see it for himself.

He said, “you’re going to be fine, it was a squirting orgasm. You should feel

pretty happy, most women can’t do that”. Whew, I was okay. But now I wanted

more! Neither one of us could fight it, we were ready, I was ready.

He grabbed me by the hair, pulled me to the bedroom, threw me down and nearly

tore my clothes off. His dick was rock hard and a lot bigger than the dildo. He

climbed on top of me, shoved his cock in and fucked me. Hard and fast, never

stopping, until finally my pussy was ready to explode. My body clenched so hard I

pushed his dick out and then I erupted all over his stomach. As I lay there shaking he

shoved his dick back in until it was his turn and he exploded all over me.

In the thirteen years that have passed since that day, I have never had an orgasm

that intense, that erotic, that amazing. I lost my virginity to a dildo, learned I could

squirt, and had sex for the first time all in the same day. They often say, “you never

forget your first time”, oh how true that is.

“Laid Up” – a Guest Post from Lauren

Today we bring you a hot and steamy story from Lauren.  Please send your well-wishes to her since she’s been recovering in the hospital for a while now, but luckily her boyfriend Aaron knows how to make her feel better.

Thanks Lauren for the guest post!!!

Laid Up

            What do you do when you’re stuck in the hospital for weeks, unable to walk and recovering from a spinal injury and back surgery, with limited feeling in your ass and vagina, yet are incredibly fucking horny?
I had limited feeling to my clit and labia, but inside my vagina, I had enough feelings to get dripping wet when my boyfriend, Aaron, would come and visit me. One night when he came to visit, both of us were ungodly horny, making out so passionately and breathing heavily and feeling the chemistry that has drawn us together since the first day we met.

The nurses were at their stations and, given the hour, wouldn’t be by to check on me until summoned.

I began by licking up his neck and kissing along his jawline as I reached down into his pants and found his hard, pulsing cock. His perfect seven inch thick cock. As I did so, he moaned and I watched as his eyes rolled back into his head.

I kissed, licked, and bit my way up to his ear and flicked my tongue inside, listening to his moans increase in volume. I whispered seductively in his ear, “Please put your cock in my mouth.” Again Aaron moaned and grabbed my hair to pull me back to crush his lips against mine. His tongue pushed and danced against mine and delved deep towards the back of my mouth, making me release my own moan. As he continued to move my lips with his own, he reached down to grab my double D breasts, letting out a gasped breath, saying “Oh, those tits.”

The nurses were away, but the door was ajar and anyone could walk in at any time. The danger of discovery made the stolen kisses and caresses more intense.

Moving his mouth down from mine, he begin kissing and sucking until he found my nipple, where he nibbled oh so gently, but the sensation was strong enough to make me let out a cry of pleasure and arch my back. I could feel my pussy tingle and begin to become wet and ready for him. Aaron caressed my breasts as my moans grew louder. His lips pressed against my ear and he murmured, “You wet, baby?” His hands began to travel down my breast and down my stomach toward my wet pussy. I brought my legs up and spread them open, revealing my tight wet pussy. He quickly slipped his fingers in, letting me know he was as excited as I was.

We both moaned at the sensation and he whispered “I can’t wait to put my cock in, baby.” I moaned at the dirty talk as he began to wiggle his longest finger right on my g-spot. It didn’t take long before I was moaning louder than before and grasping tightly onto his shirt. I know my orgasm was coming. And so did Aaron. As his finger began to fluttered inside of me faster, he started speaking to me in a voice thick with passion: “Cum baby, cum for me. Lauren, fucking cum. Cum all over my fingers, baby. Cum, Lauren, cum.” With all the dirty talk and the increase in motion within me, I came with a loud cry and gasp. I buried my face into his shoulder to try and quiet myself, and stayed there as my breath came in short gasps. Aaron stayed where he was as well, with his one arm wrapped around me, embracing me. The other was still in my soaking wet pussy. He released a quiet moan, and brought his head up to kiss me, whispering, “I love you” into the side of my neck.

I gripped the back of his neck and brought his head up to stare into his eyes to say “I love you too, but now it’s your turn.”
Before he could reply, my mouth came crushing down onto his and I slipped my tongue deep into his mouth as he moaned and pulled me closer. We continued to make out aggressively, with lip biting and sucking, until Aaron pulled back and said “Suck my fucking cock, baby.”

I quickly began to move my hands down to his pants to feel the huge bulge within. My hands fumbled as I undid his belt. His huge cock is still intimidating to me. Aaron helped and slipped his pants down enough for me to fit my hand into his boxers to feel his warm cock. “Oh God, you’re so hard baby,” I murmured, slowly moving my hand up and down his shaft. Aaron moaned again, and I quickened the motion as his member grew bigger and harder. “Please put your cock in my mouth,” I said as I moved to look into his arms.

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With a quick tongue kiss, Aaron moved to bring his dick closer to my face. I leaned down and lay on my side and began by licking from the bottom of his shaft all the way to the tip. Then I was deep throating him. Keeping my lips tightly wrapped around his pulsing member, I moved my way up to his tip and began to flick the tip quickly with my tongue, moaning as I did so. Aaron answered my moans with moans of his own, assuring me that he was enjoying himself. He then gasped and grabbed the side of my head to hold me and began thrusting his cock into me. I knew he was close to cumming, so I let him fuck my face quickly.

“Ah, baby, I’m gonna cum!” Aaron said as I grasped and squeezed the base of his shaft for extra pleasure. With a loud sigh, combined with a moan, I felt the warm, saltiness of Aaron’s cum shoot into my mouth. I began to swallow and slowly rub his shaft as Aaron continued to breathe heavily as he came. When he finished and I swallowed the last bit of his cum, I let Aaron’s cock slip out of my mouth. A little cum had slid down my lip, which I quickly licked up as I looked up to see Aaron looking down at me with a smile. Pleasuring him was even more fun than having him pleasure me.