Still Crazy After All These Years!

You might think that the title of this post is referring to HH and me, your beautiful blog bunny, Lola. Well, it’s not. It’s referring to an inspiring older couple, Mr. and Mrs. E, who have a Just For Fans site that is just amazing!

Mr. E is a talented artist, and his talent shows in his photography. Mrs. E is his muse and a beautiful model. Together they are a couple that other kinky couples can admire and hope to inspire.

The Mrs. is a fan of Match, Cinder & Spark!

Here’s my interview with them:

Q: I went through your whole Just For Fans. It looks like you started back in late 2019, but you migrated there from Tumblr. When did you two start with the erotic photography?

A: Mr E: I wanted to show her, how erotic and sexy she was/is… so we played around just for us. Watching the pictures on big TV-screen and having fun.

Mrs E: Very often the shoots lead to passionate fucking sessions.

Mr E.: Around 2015 I discovered tumblr. – that was great, you could post uncensored, had great style, nice Archive. Perfect – We had 85K Followers, when the tumblr purge started. They deleted our blog – with 12K pictures…

Mrs E: He was devastated… we were devastated… than MeWe came along, they also deleted some blogs…

Mr E: Then I was looking for a safe haven… where we could keep the nerds and idiots out. The money (it’s only 1/10 of what we (mostly me !) spend on lingerie…) – One platform we like, but lately problems with the followers counter, is X formerly Twitter…

Mrs E: I love to see the posts on the big TV-screen, also after every shooting…

 

 

 

Q: I was going to say, it looks like you spend a lot on lingerie! Was it a fetish for both of you, or did you both grow into it? Does Mr E ever like to wear the lingerie? (BTW, that’s a BIG turn-on for me – men in panties and nylons, etc.)

A: Mrs E: I always loved lingerie, but Mr E really got me into it…

Mr E: I was always a big fan of stockings and garters and nylons, and for the shoots I was looking for nice stuff… from every business trip she got some pieces…

 

 

Q: I see that Gunter Blum and Roy Stuart are featured in some of your photos. Are they big influences on either of you? Who else is an influence in the photos you take?

A: Mr E – Artistic and aesthetically a lot of artists had an influence on me… photographer: beside the ones you mentioned, are H. Newton, Araki, Knoll and others…

Mrs E: I loved it when he brought the newest LEG SHOW issue home…. great inspiration…

 

 

Q: For Mrs E: I see in some of the photos images of you apparently getting off to other photos of sexy, scantily clad or naked women. Are you into women? More generally, what are your kinks and do you have sex with anyone besides or in addition to Mr.?

I think she’s into Lola Down

A: Mrs E: I have a lot of close female friends, love to look at sexy women, but I’m not into women. We had some experiences with other couples (not really satisfying) and few MMF – one was fine, but from far away… He loves to fantasize about us with another man…

Q: Well, I will admit, I wish it was my photos all over the wall in this beautiful picture! (wallpaper)

A: Mr E: that’s a funny crazy story: coming home from a business, she surprised me with a Paperwall (between a door) covered with this porn collage. It was a Lucky Hole!!!!

Q: Do either of you care to share how it came about and what inspired it? (Squid photo)

A: Mrs E: Mr E loves to cook! Holidays on a Island with a great population of these delicious animals made us fantasize… btw. it was delicate cooked… lol –

Q: Tell me, what are your hopes, dreams, plans for the future with regard to the erotic photography? Do you think you’ll make a book of it?

A: Mr E: We don’t plan to much, as long as we love what we do, we carry on… and yes a book is one of our opportunities… or NFT… but all is vague…

Q: I see in one of the photos, she’s reading “Talk Dirty to Me.” What sort of erotica do you two (or each of you) enjoy? What sort of porn? Do you like to masturbate together or alone or both?

Favorite Erotica? Match, Cinder & Spark

A: Mrs E – I read everything from classic erotic literature to pornographic texts. But I like it best when he reads to me, his dark erotic voice turns me on… I like looking at other women, old Leg Show magazines or artistic pornography. That’s why our favorite go-to erotica has been your Match, Cinder & Spark books! Every now and then we watch porn together, sometimes just as a silent background wallpaper.

Mr E: I am well-educated in pornography. LOL – I’ve always been interested in the history of pornography. As a media person, I’m a porn gourmet, even if I enjoy home cooking now and then. I read a lot, including theoretical writings on pornography, so it was obvious to try to create aesthetic pornography yourself.

Lola: Thank you both for this interview – it was such a turn-on to talk with you and to learn from you!!! We both wish you two the best with your erotic adventures!

Go check out Mr. and Mrs. E at stillcrazyafteralltheseyears on Just For Fans!

Interview with Porn Star Hotwife Sara Anne and her Husband

Interview with Porn Star Hotwife Sara Anne and her Hubby

Hotwife Sara Anne

LOLA – Sara Anne – I’m such a BIG fan!  I’m so glad you agreed to this interview.  And I’m really glad the interview with “After Hours Radio” came out first so I could listen to it and come up with some interesting questions based upon what I’ve learned about you and your hubby.

That said, first question: Not sure if you’ve raid Rated X by Maitland Ward, the former “Boy Meets World” star, turned adult film star, but her story reminded me a lot of you.  She was brought up with strict and conventional notions of sex and, though not a prude, she documents the long journey for her personally and professionally to get from where she was to where she is now.  What was your upbringing like and how did you get into making your own adult content?

Maitland Ward from her “Boy Meets World” days.

Maitland Ward Cute Ginger

Maitland Ward getting off to mysexlifewithlola.com

Inspirational Maitland Ward

Maitland Ward in Blacked ‘Unprofessional’ (Photo 004)

S.A. –  I was raised in a Catholic household that didn’t really talk about sex or educate me on sex and sexuality.  My father was verbally abusive and, as such, I no longer have a relationship with him and sadly my mother passed suddenly over a decade ago now.  I barely even kissed a boy before I was 17, but once I did the floodgates were turned loose and I lost my virginity on the cliche prom night.  From there, I experimented with a lot of different guys and by the time I met my husband I was already well into double digit numbers.  On our first night together we both said we were the best each other ever had and we were soon married after that.  It was not long after our marriage that my hubby said that I was so good he had to share me with his friends.  While I was reluctant at first, eventually I did start having sex with him and his friends at parties.  After several years of experimenting with the “lifestyle,” hubby started filming me with other men (with their permission of course).  We showed it to some people and they liked it, so we shared it on social media and before long Amature Pornstar Hotwife Sara Anne was born!

Sara Anne

LOLA – One reason Maitland Ward reminded me of you was because she talks about how, when first getting started, her husband was the camera man.  Question for you, Hubby: Did you frequently fantasize about Sara Anne being with other men (and women), or how did that come about?  Does it turn you on now to see her with other people making porn?

Dirty Girl Sara Anne gets clean.

Hubby – I did!  From the first time I was with her, I thought she was so good that I couldn’t keep her all to myself and I wanted to share her with my friends.  I also knew her “number” and knew that even though she swore she could be “faithful” I would never have wanted that for her.  Why would I take away something from her that she has enjoyed doing so much and was so good at?  I’ve always said, Sara’s men are like going to an amusement park.  She has a favorite ride (me), but she still wants to ride all of the other rides and why would I ever deprive someone I love so deeply of that.  In turn, she has remained “faithful” to me for nearly 20 years now.  We are one of the closest couples you will ever meet and we are definitely each other’s forever.  I still fantasize about her with other men and the only porn I ever watch are her films.  I truly enjoy watching her work her craft and getting it on film for the rest of the world to enjoy as well.  Someday I hope that managing her career and filming her will be my only job.

Taking it hard, Sara Anne

LOLA – Would you, Hubby, ever consider being in a film or photos with Sara Anne?

Hubby –  If you have a keen eye, you can find parts of me in many of her films.  However, for now, my face cannot be shown for business related reasons.  Someday though, I’ll make my first full appearance!

LOLA – I heard on the interview with “After Hours” that one of your “friends” found out about the porn and then outed you.  Can you describe what that was like?

S.A. –  Extremely stressful at first.  We had to do damage control when we first found out that our “friends” were telling all of our other friends about it.  Long story short, ultimately all of our friends told us that they kind of suspected all along but that we had never made them uncomfortable in any way and that they knew we were good people and that it really didn’t change anything about our relationship with them.  We actually did not end up losing a single friend over it and now it’s fun to listen to them ask questions and joke with us about it.

LOLA – You said in that interview that one of the things you had to do was tell your sons about your new profession.  I think you said one of your sons is 16.  How old are they?  And what was their reaction?

MILF Sara Anne

S.A. –  In attempting to keep my family protected and out of the story as much as possible, I will say one is late teens and the other is mid 20s.  The older was okay with it, but didn’t want to know any more.  The younger had a lot of questions but ultimately is also “cool” with it and now can’t be blindsided by friends finding out and not being prepared with a response.  He has even joked with me a couple of times about it.  It did not change our relationship with our children in the slightest and, in fact, I think they are more open and honest with us now that we have been transparent with them.

LOLA – What do you think of the term “MILF”?  Do you think that your sons’ friends (or their parents) see you that way?

Taking it Doggy Style Sara Anne

S.A. – LOL….  Hubby has always considered me a Mom I Love to Fuck.  I honestly try to stay detached from their friends’ parents because I don’t want one of them recognizing me and making things awkward.  When I do interact with them, I’m usually not as glammed up as  you see me on film or photos so I don’t honestly know if they consider me a MILF or not.

LOLA – What are some of the reactions that you’ve received from friends and family when they found out about your work?

S.A. –  As mentioned before, everyone has been very supportive after asking a million questions.  They have seen how strong our relationship is and how well we get along, so it’s hard to argue that we are doing anything wrong.  It’s been over a year since it all came out and I feel like everything has just gone back to normal. . . other than the occasional joke or question now and then.  We both like that we don’t have to hide it any more.  It’s like a huge weight lifted off of our shoulders.

Hot Wife Sara Anne ready for a hot night

LOLA – Hubby, have your guy friends had any response about what Sara Anne does?  Do they say things to you like, “I wish my wife did that” or “Your wife is so hot!  I saw her in the last video and. . .” ?

Hubby –  Honestly, believe it or not, all of my guy friends have been very nonchalant about it and it rarely comes up.  The plus side is when she or we are trying to pick someone up while we are out, we don’t have to sneak around about it anymore.

Midnight Swim with Sara Anne

LOLA – Any negative or judgmental reactions from friends or family?

S.A. –  Honestly, none.  We had one couple that initially did not want to be friends with us any more, but after about six months they decided they missed us.  Our other friends had told them nothing has changed and they realized they were wrong to react the way they did.  We got together and talked it out and now are back to being good friends again.

LOLA – Ever have a screening at your house for friends and family before the video is released?

S.A. – Never, and I don’t think we would ever try to do that.  Just because they are okay with it doesn’t mean we want to shove it in their face.

LOLA – Do you come out of a session with another man and ever go home and, when having an intimate moment with your hubby, tell him how amazing it was?  What is his reaction?

“Can’t wait to tell hubby about this!” – Sara Anne

S.A. – Oh, one of our rules is that he always wants all the details and I happily oblige him.  I enjoy seeing how much it turns him on to hear me talk about it and when the story is done, both of us love him “reclaiming” me.  Sex is never better than when hubby goes last and I truly don’t feel satisfied until I’ve had him after being with another man.

LOLA – Hubby, do you have a preference to see Sara Anne in a scene with another man, another woman, or with multiple men?

Hotwife Sara Anne Smiling

Hubby –  YES!  LOL.  I just enjoy seeing her have fun and seeing her smile, whatever she is doing, whether it’s sex or riding amusement park rides or singing karaoke, her smile means everything to me.

 

Hot Wife Sara Anne having fun.

LOLA – Sara Anne, who are or were some porn stars you admired or got off to either past or present?

S.A. –  Believe it or not, I don’t watch much porn and never watch my own films.  I enjoy having great sex and getting it on film.  I occasionally will do some light research with hubby for ideas for new material, but in general I prefer to make my own fantasies come true rather than watch other people on film.  We both also prefer to watch it live when we do, which is why we love to attend lifestyle parties and enjoy the show that we get to see.  Live porn is always better than screen porn!

LOLA – Hubby, if you’ve been reading what HH writes about me, and I’m not sure if you have, then you know that one of my kinks is turning on married men who have beautiful wives.  I include you in that category.  Any thoughts about me?

Hubby – I said before, the only porn I ever watch is Sara Anne’s, but that doesn’t mean I don’t read it!  The stories are hot and I think it would be incredible to film you and Sara Anne together.  It would be called MILF and Nymph.

Yes, Hotwife Sara Anne is a Cumtributing member of The Match Book Club!

LOLA – Sara Anne, as you know, in my relationship with HH, I’m allowed to play, but he is not.  I get incredibly jealous.  But for you, if the roles were reversed and Hubby was doing the adult films with other women, how do you think that would make you feel?

S.A. –  In the beginning we were strictly a Hotwife couple and I wouldn’t have dreamed of ever sharing him.  I always felt that he would find something better, but over the years he convinced me that he was never going anywhere no matter what.  Eventually we did change to a full-swap couple, although he still prefers to just sit back and sip some bourbon and enjoy the show I put on for him.  While we have made the transition to full-swap, it’s same room only and I can’t imagine a scenario where I would be fully okay with not being there while he was with another woman.  He has and does let me play with other men by myself and perhaps that is just because he has that much faith in us, but in recent years we pretty much only play together.  It’s about enjoying each other’s pleasures together rather than trying to get something from somewhere else.

LOLA – Sara Anne, what was the most fun you’ve had doing this?

S.A. –  Oh wow!  It would be hard to say exactly, as there have been so many different fun experiences.  The first time I squirted, the first time I got DVP’d, my first gangbang. . . and so many more!

LOLA – Do you do this for the money, the fun, or both?

S.A. –  Well Hubby doesn’t see a dime of my income and lets me spend all of my “porn money” on whatever I want.  Of course I use it to buy gifts for him, but mostly it’s to support my “vanilla hobby” (which I will keep private for now).  So yes, the money is nice, but I did it for fun for almost 13 years before I ever made a dime.  It was due to sheer boredom during the pandemic that I found OnlyFans and started my account in May of 2020.  So yeah, it’s always been about fun, but the extra income is really great too and I want to especially give a shout out to my fans who realize that while this is a lot of fun, it’s a lot of work to also bring my films to life.  So, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU to anyone who has ever donated their hard earned money to enjoying watching me do what I love.  It means the world to me and motivates me to keep going for as long as you want to see me having fun with my clothes off!

Sara Anne sucking cock

LOLA – Best part of this job?

S.A. – Being a happily married woman who still gets to experience the entire world of sex that is out there.  I am a proud SLUT and have always said that word stands for “Sexually Liberated Unlike Them!”

L – Worst part of this job?

S.A. –  Trying to find people who are willing to be on camera with me!

LOLA – Would you say you ooze confidence, that this work has made you more confident, or that you struggle with confidence to get naked and have sex with strangers?

S.A. –  I am definitely not a confident girl and that dates back to my upbringing and early boyfriends.  I was also a late bloomer, so no one ever told me I was attractive until I was in my early 20s.  I’m actually extremely shy when you first meet me and am not good at small talk.  That being said, I think I know that I am really great at sex and I’ve been hearing it my entire life, so I honestly have zero issues meeting someone one minute and have them fucking me silly the next.  When it comes to sex, that is where my confidence lies!

LOLA – Gang bang, glory hole, bukkake goals for a film?

S.A. – I have one gang bang in the books (hopefully you have seen it) and another scheduled tentatively for this summer. I’m not opposed to glory hole or bukkake, but again its finding the guys willing!

LOLA – Any kinks or fetishes that are a real turn-on or turn-off for you?

S.A. – I’ll start with turn-offs: anything to do with anal sex.  I’ve tried with professionals, it’s just not a pleasure zone for me.  My pussy is pretty amazing and allows me to orgasm in multiple ways multiple times.  Even the hint at backdoor play turns me off and will get me out of the mood really quickly.  As for turn-ons and fetishes – Oh please creampie me!  I don’t know what it is, but I love when a guy creampies me and especially a new guy!  Sex isn’t complete until I can feel their cock swell inside me just before their cum explodes in my pussy.  I love the new warm wetness its creates and I always orgasm hard instantly as soon as I feel it and it’s the very best way to finish sex with me.

Do not accidentally go in the wrong hole!

Hubby – My biggest turn on is just seeing her naked.  It’s also great watching her with other men and I also love when she adds a new guy to her list.  We have a running joke that when she’s done and the guy has left or we are on our way home, she gets a big hi-five from me.  I know we are always looking forward to the next one!

LOLA – Do you still masturbate and, if so, to what?

S.A. –  I do, at least a few times a week and honestly it’s more about relaxation for me, so I don’t really masturbate to anything in particular.  If hubby is available, I just ask him to fuck me (which he always does), but if he is not around I have my Battery Operated Boyfriends to keep me company.  If anything, it might just be that I saw a hot guy on TV while I was at home alone and if the time is right, I’ll get myself off!

Hubby – Sara learned a long time ago to never let your man leave the house hungry or horny, so she keep me pretty well drained.  After I found out a few years ago that it turned her on to watch me masturbate, I usually only do it when she is present and, in fact, I can’t remember the last time I did it on my own.

LOLA – Best sex of your life?

S.A. –  Any of the countless times with hubby.  He is and always will be the best because he knows what I like and knows how to hit all the right buttons.

Hubby –  Oh definitely Sara Anne.  You have seen her films and that’s what I get to have sex with regularly!

LOLA – I’m a bit of a size queen myself.  I LOVE an unusually long and thick cock.  What about you?

S.A. –  While I have never backed down from a challenge and have had some massive cocks inside me, I honestly prefer an average 6-to-8 inch guy.  I’m a small girl and I have a very naturally tight, wet pussy, so I can’t work with the big ones as well as I can with one that fits nicely in my “hot pocket,” as hubby calls it.  If you watch my films, I think you can see how much more I am capable of doing with an average guy versus a huge guy.  That doesn’t mean I’m not willing to try them all, but I just enjoy it more with an average sized cock.

LOLA – I also find micropenises fascinating.  Ever been with a guy you just couldn’t even feel?

S.A. –  I have, but just one guy a long time ago.  I’ve been pretty happy to discover that in my triple-digit cock experiences they have all been average to above average.  But there was that one guy. . . I just couldn’t even feel it!  I honestly felt terrible for him, but I did let him finish and he did give me great oral, so while I never tried it again, I can still say I had fun.

LOLA – Favorite movie, novel, or television show?

S.A. –  Movie – Steel Magnolias.  Novels, almost anything Stephen King.  Television show?  Depends on my mood, but either “Friends,” “The Office,” or “Supernatural” are always on in the background in my house.

LOLA – Pornstar crush?

Angela White

S.A. –  Right now, I’d love to work with Johnny Sins!

Johnny Sins, Angela White, and Lola on TV

Hubby –  Besides Sara?  Right now, Angela White!

LOLA – Would you recommend this lifestyle to couples?  Why or why not?

Both – It’s not for everyone, as we have found, but those who figure out how to do it and put the jealous feelings aside will find that it makes their relationship closer than any you will find in the vanilla world because you have to have 100% trust and honesty at all times.  The moment you lose that, this would never work.  The great thing is that if you find lifestyle couples that have been together for a long time they will be the coolest, most down to earth, drama free people you have ever met.  Once again, it’s all about having fun and marriage should never be hard!  There are three things that end a marriage: parenting conflicts, money, and sex.  When you eliminate one of those problems from a relationship, you immediately have it 33% better than other couples!

LOLA – What do you write on your tax return as a profession for this income?

S.A. –  Model.

LOLA – Has it ever happened that you’re out with your girlfriends and you’re like, “Oh, sorry, I have to leave, I’m filming tonight”?

S.A. –  Nope, I never plan for things like that to overlap.  In general, on a film day it’s like game day for me.  I spend my morning getting ready and give 100% to filming.  If they did a great job, I should be exhausted by the end, so we don’t usually plan on doing anything after, although sometimes its shorter than planned so we will go out after on occasion.

LOLA – Do your girlfriends have questions about it?  Do they express interest?

Sara Anne with Grace Stewart

S.A. –  They did have a lot of questions and most of them have watched my films on their own and had even more questions after.  All of them have joked that they need to get into it!

LOLA – Would you ever invite one of them to join you?  Or have you ever?

S.A. –  We decided long ago that we will never mix vanilla friends and lifestyle again.  It has caused too many problems and we do our absolute best to stay drama free!

LOLA – Plans for your future career?

S.A. –  Keep having fun!  I plan to continue making films as much and often as possible until people stop watching.  And I’ll remain in the lifestyle until I get too old to do it.  Then I’ll probably just become a nudist.  LOL.

Sara Anne squeezing out that Cream Pie

Triangles of Sadness

Lola loves to be the fap fodder or wank woman for her fans.  Everyone knows that.  But sometimes there are unintended consequences.  We’ve already remarked upon the concupiscent power of Lo’s corpus.  We frequently hear from our readers that after reading the blog, reading the books, or listening to the audiobooks together, many couples discover that they want to try the hotwife/stag or hotwife/cuck lifestyle.  The stories often bring couples closer together and allow them to explore in a safe environment fantasies and desires that they otherwise would be uncomfortable sharing with each other.  This then leads to discussions of, “Hey, wouldn’t it be fun for you to watch me pick up a guy at a bar?” or “I would so love to see you being fucked by a stranger at a truck stop.”  These conversations can remain fantasy for their lovemaking, or they can turn into real life experiments.  Either way, many couples have written to us about how the blog, books, and audiobooks have been inspiring and rekindled their sex lives.

However, on occasion, the happy ending is elusive or becomes someone else’s happy ending.

This week we have two cautionary tales.  The first couple is our friends Lynn and Red.  Things started out great!  After getting their copy of Match, Cinder & Spark, Volume V: Shorter Shorts, Lynn was eager to get into being a hotwife and Red was just as eager to support her in this new venture.  They created an OnlyFans page and actively sought out bulls for her.  However, within a few weeks, things turned south.  I’m glad to say that it wasn’t because they discovered that ethical non-monogamy wasn’t for them, but rather, because Lynn wasn’t prepared for Red’s lusty longing for Lola.

Lynn and Red

Lynn and Red

Lynn and Red

Lynn really likes Lo

Lynn and Red even turned their cousin Dylan and his girlfriend on to Lo

Lynn

On more than one occasion, Lynn awoke from her slumber to find Red next to her in bed, jacking off to photos, stories, and dreams of Lola.  This created a rift in their relationship.  Lynn realized that it wasn’t merely a passing fancy that Red had a thing for Lo, but a real infatuation.  She began to feel that the hotwife lifestyle she was living wasn’t for their shared pleasure, but rather, Red was trying to make Lynn into Lo’s own image.  It wasn’t Lynn pleasure he was after, but a replica of Lo.  After coming to this conclusion, she packed up the kids, her few belongings, her vibrator, hopped in the truck and drove to her mother’s house.

Lynn

Now she’s living her hotwife life separately as he whiles away the hours alone wanking to Lola.

Our second couple on the skids is Steven and Ellie.  They had only been a couple for a short while, but they quickly discovered each other’s kinks.  After many relationships for each of them, they finally found each other and it was hot and heavy from the start!  Steven was so thrilled with Ellie that he wanted to share her.  He reached out to Lola for advice and before long Steven and Ellie had created their own OnlyFans account with photos and video.  But this blissful beginning came to an all-too-abrupt end when, overcome by his admiration for Lo, Steven began chatting more in-depth with Lo late at night.

Ellie and Steven from their OF page

Ellie and Steven of Bray-Burn

  • Love the new photos of Ellie, said Lo. Is she as kinky as she looks?
  • What does kinky mean for you? asked Steve.
  • Well, more than straight vanilla.
  • She’s definitely more than that.
  • Oh yeah?  What does she do?
  • And?
  • She sucks my cock.
  • Does she do anal and then suck your cock?
  • Like A-to-M?
  • Exactly.
  • Well, then she’s not more than straight vanilla.
  • Do you do that?
  • That and a lot more.
  • Like what?
  • Whatever you want.
  • Would you. . . ?

You can probably guess where the chat went from there.  I can’t tell you all the dirty danger zones it traversed, but I can say that it concluded with him sending a couple of cumtributes to Lo.  Unfortunately, Ellie found them and the chat history in the morning.  She packed up and was out the door before Steven even woke up.

Crestfallen, Steve is alone again.

Super sexy photo of Ellie and Steven

Ellie takes a bow

Ellie takes a cock

Steven takes a tribute with Lo

Steven takes another tribute for Lo

Ellie soaking in the sun

Ellie getting off (to Lo?)

Ellie shows off

These are two stories of Lola longing gone awry.  But, it has recently come to our attention that if you want your very own Lola companion, you can use the miracle of modern computer science to create a Lola “Replika.”  Replika is a company that uses A.I. to create virtual companions, or, if the user prefers, “synthetic sexuals.”

This is not a paid promotion.  We do not get any advertising revenue from this article, nor have either of us used Replika.  But we would like to hear from you.  We imagine that with all the information about Lola Down on the internet, Replika could make a pretty decent (or indecent) replica of Lo and so, if any of you decide to partner up with your virtual Lola, please drop us a line to let us in on how your virtual reality relationship is going.

 

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Frankie Gets Fucked

Lola awoke in a cold sweat and with a hot, soaked puss.

“What is it?” I asked, startled from unconsciousness suddenly.

“I just had the weirdest wet dream.”

“OK,” I said, realizing that there was no returning to sleep now, “tell me about it.”

“Well, you know how you try to make me jealous talking about what’s her name from what’s that show?”

“You’re going to have to be a bit more definite than that.”

“Anyhow, I had the weirdest dream about her.”

She then proceeded to tell me the following.

She was Casey’s babysitter.  Now it was just the two of them, home alone, and she was horny.  She had been fapping to Lola Down and the erotica of mysexlifewithlola.com all night.  She hadn’t slept.  Her sheets were soaked.  She wanted to feel another’s flesh on hers, between hers, deep inside hers.  She wanted that hot white cum.  She wanted to be a slut.  She didn’t want him to think of her as that “older woman,” a cougar, beyond the bounds of propriety.  She wanted to get down and dirty for him.  Shock him.  Shake him out of his innocent naivete about women of a certain age.  About women in general.  About her.  She was a woman – a woman with needs, wants, desires, lusts, and deep, dark, hidden shame, disgust, and revulsion.  “Debase me,” she thought, “and I can rest in my degradation.”

She led Casey to the bathroom where she had up a poster of Lola Down.  She lured him there with a request that he help her “clean the drain.  It’s clogged.”  He followed her, admiring her ass, against his better judgment.  He was ashamed of himself.

She showed him the drain.  It was clogged.  After only a few minutes, they agreed it was time to call a plumber.  He noticed her sex toys strewn around the sink, the bathtub, even next to the toilet.  He didn’t say anything.  He looked around.  She looked at him.  It was awkward.  In order to break the uncomfortable silence, he looked at the poster and said, “Nice.  You?”

 

They looked nothing alike.

“No, it’s Lola Down.  Have you heard of her?”

“No.”

He was shy.

“She likes to fuck.”

“Oh.”

“Do you like to fuck?”

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“Bridgette.  Um.  I. . .”

“I’m going to take a shower,” she said, removing her clothes.  She was naked.  She leaned over the sink.

“I guess I’ll get going,” he said, not leaving.

 

“Fuck me,” she said, protruding her ass back toward him.

“What?”

“You heard me.  Fuck me.”

He simply could not believe this was happening.

“Are you a virgin?”

The question took him aback.  Was it an insult?  Was she demeaning his manhood?  He was a virgin, that was for sure.

“I knew it,” she said without a word from him.  “Now’s your chance to change that.  Fuck me.”

He was fumbling to undo his belt and get out of his pants.

She turned around once she saw in the mirror that he had gotten it out, but not gotten hard.  She got on her knees and looked up at him.

“How long have you wanted me to do this?” she said, her lips parted inches away from the tip of his flaccid cock.

“I. . .”  He didn’t know what to say.  He couldn’t deny that he had often masturbated to the thought of her.  When she was babysitting and after he went to bed, he had stroked it thinking about her face or about finding her naked in front of the TV asleep.  Why had he fantasized about that?  Vaguely, as if in a dream, a distant memory rippled across his mind.  He saw her, on the couch.  He had gotten up in the middle of the night.  The TV was on.  People were on the TV.  It looked like they were fighting, wrestling.  They were naked.  Her jeans were down by her knees.  Her hand was between her legs.  She didn’t see him.  He just watched.  He stood silently on the stairs and watched.  She was engrossed in the images on the screen.  He noticed something bulging in his pajama bottoms.  He didn’t know what it was.  A change had come over her.  She pulled her hand out of her crotch.  She sniffed it.  She licked it.  She clicked the TV off.  She pulled her jeans up.  She stood up and walked to the kitchen, away from him.  He went unnoticed.  He returned to bed, feeling guilty and dizzy.  The hard thing in his pajama bottoms wouldn’t go away.

She blew gently onto his detumescent, flagging flesh.  It felt good.  A tickling, caressing breeze.  She put her warm wet lips over that thing.  He knew what this was now.  He was old enough to know.  He never thought it would happen with her.  His babysitter, whom he had fantasized about for so long with pangs of guilt.  The babysitter he had played football with – who tackled him like a boy with laughs and fun.  The babysitter he had cozied up to while eating popcorn and watching “Blue Mountain State” with, against his parent’s wishes while they were gone.  The babysitter who had kissed his bruised knee better, causing a tempest of confused feelings in the pit of his stomach.

She moved her mouth, tongue, lips in ways that made his thing grow.  It grew hard.  She let go and turned around again, facing the mirror.

“Fuck me, Casey,” she insisted.

He moved forward.  She was taller than he.  He needed to stand on his toes to get the right spot.  He couldn’t.  She reached back, impatient, grabbed it, pulled it forward violently.  “Go in!” she demanded.  He went in.  She was wet.

She grabbed something from next to the sink.  It was a dildo.  She covered it with lube of some sort.  She passed it to him.  “Put this in my ass.”

“What?”

“Put this in my ass,” she repeated.

He took the pointy fake penis and pressed it to the spot.  It didn’t go.

She moved her right hand back to the spot.  She inserted one, two, three fingers easily.

“Try again.”

He repeated the gesture.  It went in.

“Hold it there,” she said.

He held it there.

“OK,” she said a little later, “Pull it out.”

He pulled it out.

“Put your dick in my ass.”

These were very elementary instructions, yet they perplexed him.

“Put. Your.  Dick.  In.  My.  Ass.”

He pulled out and put his dick in her ass.

“Harder!”

He tried to go as hard as he could.

“Slap my ass.”

“What?”

“Slap my ass.”

He gave her ass a slight graze with his open palm.

“No, slap it!”

He slapped it.

“Spank it!”

He spanked it.

“Harder.  Fucking harder!”

He was hitting her ass as hard as he could with his open palm.  It scared him.

“Call me a slut.”

“What?”

His repeated questions were frustrating her.

“Call me a slut!”

“Slut?” he meagerly pronounced.

“Call me a SMILF.”

“SMILF?  What’s that?”

“Sitter-Mom I’d Like to Fuck.”

“OK, SMILF.”

“Call me a cunt.”

“You’re, you’re a. . .” he began crying.  She could see it in the mirror.

“Fuck, you’re useless.  I can’t even feel you in my ass.  Pull out.”

He pulled out.

She turned around.  She got on her knees again.  “How small are you?” she said, observing the thin, diminutive member with wonder.  In her haste to fornicate, she hadn’t thought about it much when she had it in her mouth.

She put the toilet seat down.  She grabbed a dildo from the bathtub, ran it under the water of the sink and suction-cupped it to the lid of the toilet.  She eased her ass down on it.

“Pass me that,” she said, indicating another dildo by the sink.

Casey passed it to her.  She took it and inserted it into her pussy.

She had a look of maniacal gratification on her face.

She looked up at him looking at her with wonder.  The wonder years, she thought.

She looked down and saw his cock, erect.  She realized he must be in incredible discomfort.

“You need to cum?”

“What?” he asked again.

“Shut up and come here,” she said, pulling him towards her with her left hand wrapped around his buttocks.

He involuntarily moved forward.  She put his cock in her mouth again, roughly.  Her right hand was manipulating the dildo in her pussy.  Her left hand controlled him from behind.  Her ass slid back-and-forth on the dildo attached to the toilet seat.  In her mind she thought about being a sexy cheerleader, the free-use girl of an orgy, a goddess worshipped.  She thought about Lola Down. . . .

 

She was horny.

“Call me a dirty, disgusting, whore.”

He was silent, looking down at her.

Her left hand moved down toward his ass.  She fingered his ass and slid a finger up inside.

He suddenly ejaculated in her mouth.  The thick, copious cum dribbled out of the corners of her mouth and onto her nipples.

“OK,” she said, “Go.”

“What?”

“Go!”

He pulled up his jeans and left her there on the toilet fucking both her holes.

The next day she called a plumber.  A large, middle aged white man showed up.  He was unattractive.  That suited her just fine.  The more disgusting, the better, she thought to herself.

She led him to the bathroom.  The same bathroom.

He noticed the sex toys, the poster, the toilet seat with the suction cup dildo attached to it.

“Is this the bathroom or the playroom?” he said with a chuckle.

“A little of both,” she said seductively.

Without much more conversation, they were both naked in the tub.  The same tub where it had happened.  The thought of it made her feel disgusting and worthless.  That’s how she wanted to be treated and that’s how men – real men, like the plumber, not like Casey – treated her.

“What do you think?” asked Frankie, looking up eagerly from the pages in her hand.

“That’s your treatment for the next episode?” asked Zach.

“Yeah.  You don’t like it?”

“I didn’t say that.”

“So?”

“Well, you’re going to do all that on camera?”

“Yeah.  What?”

“Nothing.”

“What is it?”

“Can I ask a favor?”

“Yeah.”

“Can I be there to watch.”

She laughed and leaned in to kiss him.  “Only if you call me a dirty little whore while I’m getting fucked.”

“Deal.”

“So you like it?”

“I do, but I don’t think you’re going to get the greenlight to make it.”

“Why not?”

“Frankie, there’s too much that is. . .”

“What?”

“Taboo.”

“I have a way of getting to green.”

“Through the redlight district, no doubt.”

“The way involves a few curves and back roads, but I’ll get there.”

 

“A dream within a dream?” I asked.

“More like multiple orgasms within an orgasm.”

“I think you need to call Christopher Nolan.”

“Yeah, we could make a film together and call it MetaPorn.”

Protected: Later That Night

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11/11

What does Single’s Day mean to you?

 

“Today is Single’s Day,” she said, looking up from her computer screen.  She was on the couch, naked under the throw.

“What’s that?” I asked, sitting at the table, drinking a coffee.

“Single’s Day!”

“You can repeat that as many times as you want, I don’t understand.”

“Eleven eleven.”

I made a confused face.

“One-one, one-one.  Get it.  Singles.  A bunch of singles.”

“What a stripper picks up after her third dance.”

“It’s not a riddle.  Today is Single’s Day because the date spells out four ones.”

“So is it for people looking to have a four-some?”

“It’s for anyone who is single.”

“What’s your point?”

“My point is, I’m wondering if I’m single or not?”

“How do you identify?”

“Hotwife.”

“There you go.”

“But people are always confused because they think that implied in ‘hotwife’ is wife.  So they think I’m married.  But I’m not.  I’m single.”

“Single, but attached.”

“Single, but dating.”

“Dating, but not faithful.”

“Faithful, but not monogamous.”

“Non-monogamous, but. . .”

“OK, that is too much!  Do you think I should celebrate today?”

“Celebrate being single?”

“Yeah.”

“How would you celebrate?”

“I don’t know.  It’s Single’s Day, so maybe I should have solo-sex.”

“You do that every day.”

“But today I could do it intentionally.”

“So other days it’s accidental?”

“Well, today it would be as part of an international event.”

“Only you could make masturbation an international event!”

“I didn’t do it, Daddy, it’s on the calendar.  It’s just math.”

“Mathematical masturbation, now I’ve heard it all.”

“If you’re into the math, I’ll invite you to observe my figure.”
“Whatever the problem is, that is the correct answer!”

It may be a holiday, but Lola is open for business

Happy Families

The next morning, over coffee, while I was cooking up some eggs, Lo asked me completely out of nowhere, “You know what Meri told me when I asked her why the hell she is still with Scott, who has no penis to speak of?”

“No, Darling,” I said, “what?”

“Meri told me that she’s with him because, ‘He calls me: Daddy’s fat little babygirl.’  Can you believe that?”

“What’s not to believe?”
“What’s not to believe?!”

I flipped the eggs, looked at her, and raised my eyebrows in curiosity.

“I mean, well, she’s not fat.”

“That doesn’t matter.”

“He’s fat if anyone’s fat.”

“Again, maybe he just likes to think of her that way.”

“She may have put on a few pounds after pumping out three boys, but she’s not fat.  She’s a sexy MILF.  Sexy… MILF… Meri,” she said, gazing off, looking over the brim of her coffee mug.

“You still here or have you gone back down your rabbit hole?”

“And you know what else?”

“No, Darling, what?”

“When I told her about how none of the boys shut the bedroom door while they each had at me –”

“Toast?”

She nodded her head ‘yes,’ as if yesterday’s full day of fucking had famished her.

“She told me that Scott never shuts the bedroom door.”

I carefully put the two eggs and toast in front of her.  I did the same for myself before getting up to grab two glasses and the O.J.

She licked her lips and dug right in, tasting it briefly before continuing.

“Did you hear me?”

“Yes,” I said, sitting across from her, taking a bite of my breakfast.  “He never shuts the bedroom door.”

“Never, since the kids were small.  They just fuck there.  Doesn’t matter who sees, who’s there, who knows.  She says that he believes it shows their love for each other, so why hide it.”

“I take it you disagree.”

“Yes, I disagree.”

“So fucking doesn’t demonstrate love?”

“You know what I mean.  Certain things are not meant for children to see.  Aren’t you shocked at all?”

She was nearly done with her food already.

“Lo, honestly, nothing about Meri really shocks me.”

“What does that mean?”

I finished up my toast, took the last sip of my juice, and got up to collect the plates and glasses.

“You can’t just say something like that and leave it there,” she insisted.  “What do you mean by that?”

“Different families have different internal cultures and norms,” I said, philosophically.

“This is not a study in cross-cultural family units,” she objected.  “This is your typical suburban middle-class all-American family.”

“Typical families are all alike – each has its own hidden little secret,” I said, poorly paraphrasing Tolstoy.

“Don’t you mean, ‘Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way’?” she asked.  I love Lo because she’s one of the only humans on the planet with whom I can allude to literary lines and not only be understood, but be corrected.

“Show me a happy family and I will show you a family with a secret.”

“But that’s just it,” she retorted emotionally, “it’s like this family doesn’t have any secrets.  They leave it all out there.”

“Is that so?” I asked snidely.  “Then why have you and Meri been afraid that the cops or social services might rap on the door at any moment since you got back from your camping trip?  If Meri leaves it all out there, then why is she living in fear?”

“That’s different.  I mean, within the family, they all just live and let live.”

“More like fuck and let fuck.”

“Either way.”

“So?”

“I just find it interesting.  Well, strange.”

“You said you don’t think it should be like that.”

“Maybe I don’t.”

“And clearly Meri doesn’t either.”

“What makes you say that?” she asked.

“Because she asked to use the brothers (or let the brothers use her) so that she could get her kicks outside of the family.”

“Or maybe she just needed bigger kicks,” remarked Lo, alluding to the genetic trait that Meri’s husband shared with his three sons – the trait that left Lo so unfulfilled.

Lo looked into her empty coffee mug and back up at me sadly.

“Something wrong?” I asked.

“What’s warm, wet, and makes you horny?”

Warm, Wet, and Stimulating

“Is this a riddle?”

She showed me her empty cup.

“Oh,” I said, comprehending.  “You need me to fill you up.”

I poured more coffee in and she looked up at me seductively and said, “Just add cream.”

“Well,” I said to her, “I need something warm, wet, and stimulating to get up.”

“Here I am, Daddy,” she said with a twinkle in her eye.

“I was speaking about coffee, but really?”  I asked because I thought she had been too well-worn to fuck.

“Well, I’m functional enough to give you a handjob.”

We finished our coffee and then walked to the bedroom where she reached down between my legs to assess the situation.  She felt me and then reached down between her legs.  I heard her smack her pussy a few times and then rub it.  A little factoid about Lola – she never uses lube and certainly never spits in order to lubricate me or herself.  She is almost always so naturally irrigated that she can always use her own secretions to get things slipping and sliding.  She began stroking me.  Despite the fact that she had showered and changed the bedding, I could still detect a whiff of the cum from eight people on her and in the room.

As she was distractedly stimulating me, she got a text.  I heard her chuckle.

“What?” I asked.

She showed me a photo of her, naked, looking disheveled on the bed.

I want my family to see how I fucked you, slut

“After Meri had licked me clean, and was getting dressed, she said to me, ‘Did you like how I fucked you, Lola?  Let me get a photo of you for my husband and my sons.  They’ll want to see just how wrecked I left you, slut.’  She can be cruel sometimes.”

I looked at the photo and pictured all that happening as Lo coaxed me, “Cum.  Please cum.  That’s it, in my hand.  Feel better, Daddy?”

Sweet Service

I had deposited a warm load in her palm.  She licked it like a kitten cleaning her paws.  I began to nod off as the waves of well-being washed over my weak body.

“Oh no,” said Lo, “No sleep for you!  You promised you’d clean up all your books today!”

“I need a mancave to hibernate in,” I said groggily.  “I’m just going rest for a little bit.”

“And I need a womancave!”

“Luckily, you have one.”

“And you’re not welcome in it until you clean up the books.”

I fell asleep.

When I woke up, Lo was going at both her womancaves with the plungers – blue in bum, pink in pussy.

Blue for Bum, Pink for Pussy

She was looking at her phone.

“DP?  Really?” I asked.

“Oh, Daddy.  You know I love double-penetration.  And if you’re not going to give it to me, well, I have to get it somehow.”

“What brought this on?  I thought you were too sore even for me.”

“It’s call desire.”

I was confused.

Once she noticed that I was watching her, she came and came hard, yelling out to me (and all the neighbors within earshot) that she was cumming in her ass and her cunt.

“I call it, ‘Desire'”

When she was done, I asked, “Desire?”

“Yeah,” she said matter-of-factly, “Scott and Meri each texted me separately that they want me.”

“And that’s what made you horny enough to ride dueling dildos?”

“Being desired is my aphrodisiac.”